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Mwanamke anayejituma au mtafutaji......

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by MadameX, Sep 25, 2012.

  1. MadameX

    MadameX JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Sep 25, 2012
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    Ni kwa utafiti wangu nimekuja kugundua kuwa, iwapo unafanya kazi au ni mtafutaji wa maisha, hapa ninamaanisha ya kuwa wewe si tegemezi au goalkeeper mara nyingi unakuta kuna haki zinapotea au hutendewi na mumeo.

    Maisha ya sasa ni sawa kusaidiana, lakini ndoa za leo ukiwa unafanya kazi unakuta jambo la mume kukuhudumia wewe halipo kivile. Kuna zile huduma ambazo ni za joint account kama mambo ya nyumba na watoto. Lakini mume anawajibu hata kama sio kila mara ni lazima kumnunulia mke nguo, salon expense au time to time to provide with her needs can be anything, hapa simaanishi physical needs. Hii inatoka directly katika mfuko wa mume.

    Lakini siku hizi ukiwa una kaincome kidogo sahau mume kukupa hata pocket money, mume bora anaweza kupimwa na hizi three Ps; Profess, Provide and Protect kama alivyosema Steve Harvey. Na hii issue inagusa kwenye providing.

    Wataalamu hebu tiririkeni
     
  2. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Sep 25, 2012
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    madame x, unalosema ni ukweli kabisa, wanaume wengi sana huwa wanajisahau kuhusu kuhudumia wake zao na hii husababishwa na wake zao ambao wanajiweza kimapato kutokudemand hizo needs kutoka kwao. sababu ya wao kufanya hivyo ni kuona niombe za nini?

    mfano mimi huwa nasemaga pesa yako siombi ila ukinipa nitapokea. siombi kwasababu ukininyima nitaumia sana na pia ukinipa kisa nimeomba utasema nilihitaji tok kwako. as a man you should feel that you owe your wife her good personality and happiness. wavesheni vizuri na wapeni matunzo mazuri kifedha. achilia mbali what you give for family development.

    inapendeza basi hata gari unamnunulia mkeo na mafuta ya kazini kama unazo hii inakupanulia wigo wa kuonekana baba anayewajibika zaid kwenye familia na hukuza upendo zaid.

    but on the other hand, wanawake nasi tuwe mara chache chache tunawafanyia suprise basi, siku uiangalia wallet coin ndo zimebaki basi unamboost na hata ka laki naye ajione kama ana mtu anaye mjali zaid.
     
  3. Watu8

    Watu8 JF-Expert Member

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    Sep 25, 2012
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    ngoja nijibanze hapa kando nione wengine wanavyochangia halafu baadae nikirudi nitaririka...hii thread kuchangia inahitaji kichwa kiwe stress free
     
  4. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #4
    Sep 25, 2012
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    Siku zote nasema na nitazidi kusema kuwa Mwanamke ndio hu determine nyumba, familia na ndoa itakuwa inaendeshwa kwa namna ipi. Katika jamii zetu za Kiafrika kiutamaduni imejengeka kuwa mwanaume anatakiwa a provide kwa ajili ya familia yake.. (ni kitu ambacho kinaendelea hadi sasa thou kikienda kikipungua kwa kasi tokana na sababu mbali mbali).

    Ndio maana ni bora toka mwanzo mkaweka mazoea ili yajijenge. Sio wanaume wote wanapenda kufanya majukumu yao in the line of 'family responsibility'. Ni wachache (God Bless their souls) ambao HUJITUMA kwa dhati kuwa ni wajibu wake kujali familia no matter mkewe ana kipato ama Lah. Wengine hufanya sabababu ni obligation... Mke ukilegeza kamba ukajifanya unaweza bila yeye, then imekula kwako...

    Hivo unapokuta mume mvivu, mtegevu, mpenda kujirusha hasa kimagenge na nadra na familia, asiyokuwa na focus hasa katika maendeleo, asiyefanya bila kusukumwa ndio mumeo na wewe wajituma. Unaweza kuta unasimamia familia yenu na mwisho wa siku anakopa hadi hela kwako akichacha (na hali ha provide).

    Mie naamini katika kugawana majukumu (hasa kama mwanamke na wewe wajishughulisha); sababu at the end of the day he is human too... Kuna wakati anachoka nae anahitaji support. Hapo ni bora kabisa mkagawana majukumu tokana na kipato chenu, mjue kabisa tuna joing account ambayo hiatakiwi kugusa (ni kwa ajili tu ya family emergencies) nje ya wajibu kama chakula, bills, na the like. Hio inasaidia hata kuwepo na amani ndani ya nyumba... Sasa hivi ugomvi wa wanandoa wengi upo 'economically based', hivo hio sector ikisimamiwa vema inaweza kuwa msaada sana kwa wana ndoa...
     
  5. Smile

    Smile JF-Expert Member

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    Sep 25, 2012
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    Mke ni msaidizi tukumbuke
    ila siku hizi wababa loh sio wa kusaidiwa tena ..ni mizigo
     
  6. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Sep 25, 2012
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    Kazi ipo.
    Wanawake wenyewe wa sasa mmekuwa ma-CEO, tena wengine wa makampuni yenu wenyewe.
    Mnatutisha wame zenu kuwanunulia SIMLA wakati nyie level zenu zishakuwa Givennchy, DKNY, au Dior.

    Tupeni uhuru na hakika ya kisaikolojia kwanza ili tuweze kwenda sambamba
     
  7. BADILI TABIA

    BADILI TABIA JF-Expert Member

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    Sep 25, 2012
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    subiri wakusikie.............

    kama hawajaukimbia huu uzi.......

    ila ndoa ni vile mnavyoijenga, kutegemeana na kipato cha wanandoa na mazoea yao.....





     
  8. platozoom

    platozoom JF-Expert Member

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    Sep 25, 2012
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    Hapo sasa miye mfagizi ofisini kwetu mwanamke meneja wa kampuni fulani (alianza na u-supervisor pengine). Mshahara wake 900,000 take home...........Miye ndiyo kwanza nimegonga 150,000, nyumbani nina kamradi ka kiosk kanaingiza 3,000 faida kwa siku ambayo ni 90,000 kwa mwezi......Ukijumlisha na mshahara ndio inafika 240,000. Wakati huohuo mke wangu akipiga dili moja kwa mwezi anaondoka na 400,000 jumlisha na mshahara inakuwa 1,300,000.

    Gap kama la 900,000.......halafu bado unataka kwenye 240,000 yangu unichinje hela ya saluni, makeup, less wigi khaaa!! Kusema ukweli hapo mimi nitaprovide dushelele tu material things tuchangie in propotion
     
  9. s.fm

    s.fm JF-Expert Member

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    Sep 25, 2012
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    Ama kweli we really cant go against nature....and this we call gender inequality will never end! yani Mungu amesaidia umepata kazi safi maisha yanaenda! halafu tena nikuongezee eti 'pocket money' mwe..!
     
  10. Smile

    Smile JF-Expert Member

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    Sep 25, 2012
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    kuna kitu huwa najiuliza kongosho
    mwanamke wkend anaenda saluni
    kuosha nywele ...3,000
    kusuka less wigi....50,000
    ka less wig ka kichina....150,000
    mafuta yake ya kichina....25,000
    kuosha miguu....12,000
    kutinda nyusi.....2,500
    kubandika kope...12,000
    kula na soda hapo saluni.....10,000
    tena hii ni saluni ya uswazi kabisa
    kwanini wanaume wasihame nyumbani?
     
  11. Smile

    Smile JF-Expert Member

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    Sep 25, 2012
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    kama mtu analewa toka asubui tusemeje?
     
  12. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

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    Sep 25, 2012
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    inategemea na kipato cha mme au cha mwanamke huyo.

    Nilichotaka kusema kwenye post yangu ya awali ni 'changanya na zako'

    usije ukamkamua mmeo hadi damu wakati uwezo wake waujua.

    Mie mme akitoa chakula na malazi na shule ya watoto, vingine wala simdai, atatoa akijisikia.

     
  13. Smile

    Smile JF-Expert Member

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    tatizo wanawake wengi wabinafsi mno si uliona ile case ya jana?
    Maisha ni kushirikiana bwana
    mfano mimi nikitoka na mpenzi wangu akinunua chakula mimi nanunua maji ya kunywa
     
  14. Ndahani

    Ndahani JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Sep 25, 2012
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    Naamini familia inajengwa na watu wote wawili. Si lazima wote muwe na kipato sawa au la...ila kusaidiana katika kutafuta si kitu cha mwanaume peke yake kama mnaitakia mema familia yenu. Tatizo nilionalo mimi ni partners kushindwa kuenda sambamba kwenye level of thinking ya kitu gani kinahitaji kufanyika ili mapato ya familia yaende sawa sawa. Tukumbuke, gharama za maisha zimepanda sana na kama ni mtu mmoja tu anayefanya kila kitu hiyo familia haitakuwa sustainable.
    Tatizo lilipo wengi tumeamua kuwa average performers na hatuamini katika kujishughulisha kwa bidii ili kupata kipato cha ziada. haiwezekani kwa mshahara mdogo tu ule, ununue nguo, ujenge, usome watoto kama hutakuwa na bidii ya kufanya ya ziada kuongeza kipato.
     
  15. Kaizer

    Kaizer JF-Expert Member

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    Sep 25, 2012
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    Hahaa nakumbuka tumeahaijadili sana hii kitu hapa. Ngoja emotions ziishe


    Here we go again!
     
  16. K

    Kifulambute JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Sep 25, 2012
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    kabla sijakuoa ulikuwa unahudumiwa na nani hizo expenses
     
  17. MKATA KIU

    MKATA KIU JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Sep 25, 2012
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    Kwa hali hii bado tupo tupo sana,, sijawai kuona b mkubwa akiomba pesa kwa mzee na sitegemei kumpa pocket money wife kama ana kipato kizuri,, labda kama ana emergency ambayo kweli naona anahitaj pesa nying ndo nitamuongezea... Majukumu kugawana jaman baba atalipa school fees, kujenga nyumba, kununua magari etc na mama atashughulikia misos yote home, vyombo na hata mavazi ya watoto na mambo madogomadogo,,, zaidi ya hapo ndoa hio siwezi kusema kweli na sijazoea kuona mtegemezi wakati nae anatoka asubuhi kila siku kama mimi, kama ni hivyo ni bora abaki nyumban nijue moja nina house wife,,
     
  18. Lucci

    Lucci Member

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    Sep 25, 2012
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    ni kweli , siku hizi mambo yamebadilika sana, yaani huduma hakuna kabisa hata zile za kishkaji.
    simaanishi kila siku lakini hata mara moja kwa mwezi !!? unakuta mwanamke kila kitu umeachiwa kila unafanya kazi.
    Kuna nyumba moja mwanaume hata chakula hanunui eti kisa mkewe ana kipato?
     
  19. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

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    Sep 25, 2012
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    ha ha ha, acha emotions ziishe kwa kweli.

     
  20. Njowepo

    Njowepo JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Sep 25, 2012
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    It all depends na ninyi wenyewe makubaliano yenu!
    Bse kuna vitu mwanamke akikiona kizuri anamnunulia mumewe sio kila siku mwanamme awe wa kununua erase that mindset
     
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