Dismiss Notice
You are browsing this site as a guest. It takes 2 minutes to CREATE AN ACCOUNT and less than 1 minute to LOGIN

Mume wa jinsi hii........kama mke utavumilia kweli?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Pretty, Feb 7, 2012.

  1. Pretty

    Pretty JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Mar 19, 2009
    Messages: 2,582
    Likes Received: 25
    Trophy Points: 135
    ........Wana MMU mambo zenu!! Haya leo kuna hili, wewe mdada umeolewa na mwanaume ambaye anakujali. I mean anakupa huduma zote kama chakula, malazi na mavazi. Yaani chochote unachotaka kama ana uwezo nacho anakupa.

    .......Ila sasa huyu mwanaume ana matatizo yake, nayo kama hivi:

    • Mvivu kukutana kimwili na mkewe, sio kwamba ana matatizo hapana. Yaani tendo la ndoa halipi kipaumbele sana.
    • Hapendi kutoka out, anaweza kumpeleka mkewe sehemu yoyote anayotaka kwenda, akifika huko yeye anabaki kwenye gari na kumuacha mkewe aende na watoto.
    • Wakialikwa sehemu, kama kwa marafiki kupata dinner au mkusanyiko wowote wa watu haendi, lazima atoe udhuru.
    Hana maneno laini, kama mjuavyo wanawake tunapenda kusifiwa. Hata mkewe ajitahidi kufanya kitu kizuri kama kupika, kuvaa vizuri hajui hata kumsifia mkewe. Watu wa nje watamsifia mkewe lakini si mumewe.
    Mkewe ameshamwambia muda mrefu kwamba hapendi hiyo tabia yake, na je watoto watajifunza nini kwa baba wa jinsi hii?

    Huyu mdada ameniambia mengi kuhusu mumewe, ila mimi nimeshindwa kumwambia achukue uamuzi gani.......nimebaki tu nimezubaa kwa hizi tabia za mumewe.

    Kuna mengi yakuandika kuhusu huyo mume wa mtu......sasa jamani mume wa hivi kweli anavumilika? Kama wewe mdada umeolewa na mume wa jinsi hii utafanyaje?
     
  2. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Mar 21, 2011
    Messages: 36,152
    Likes Received: 177
    Trophy Points: 145
    ukipata raha sana
    wakati mwingine unaanza kutafuta shida

    huyu mama kashiba!
     
  3. Pretty

    Pretty JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Mar 19, 2009
    Messages: 2,582
    Likes Received: 25
    Trophy Points: 135
    ......Kwa hiyo wewe huoni tatizo hapo?
     
  4. King'asti

    King'asti JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Nov 26, 2009
    Messages: 27,047
    Likes Received: 1,247
    Trophy Points: 280
    Huyo baba ana tatizo la low self esteem. Inawezekana hata hana confidence na mwili wake (si ajabu hata hizo mechi chache anangojea giza liingie na tanesco wam-support). Inawezekana malezi aliyopata na mazingira aliyopitia yamechangia. Dada ana kazi moja tu, vile wameshaoana, amjengee high self esteem. Amsifie mumewe mbele za watu na yeye akishuhudia kwenye mazuri yake, wakiwa alone amsifie ama na watoto wao amsifie pia.
    Kuna vitu vidogo tu, kama kumshukuru mwenza kwa kujali familia, kununua chakula, na hata sex; vitu vinavyochukuliwa kama wajibu lakini ukishukuru kwa kukubali kufanya wajibu wake itamsaidia kubadilika na kutaka kufanya ya ziada.
     
  5. King'asti

    King'asti JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Nov 26, 2009
    Messages: 27,047
    Likes Received: 1,247
    Trophy Points: 280
    Ni nani anatafsiri 'tatizo'? Counting ur blessings huwa inasaidia sana bibie! Kuna wanawake wanalalama hapa mume hanunui hata mboga, serial cheater, anamtukana na kumpiga, anamdharau, hapendi ndugu, hataki mke afanye kazi. Unajua kuna wanaume kama yeye hataki kutoka atahakikisha sio mkewe wala wanae wanatoka?
     
  6. Pretty

    Pretty JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Mar 19, 2009
    Messages: 2,582
    Likes Received: 25
    Trophy Points: 135
    ......ujue tatizo nililoliona mie ni mdada kuwa mpweke, sasa unaenda out na watoto mume hayupo.....huko huko outing unaona couple nyingine na watoto wao. Hapa lazima mdada ajisikie yupo lonely.
     
  7. King'asti

    King'asti JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Nov 26, 2009
    Messages: 27,047
    Likes Received: 1,247
    Trophy Points: 280
    Mpenzi, tatizo letu binadamu ni ubinafsi na kujitanguliza wenyewe! Unadhani huyo baba wa watu kukaa kwenye gari alone yeye hajiskii kuwa lonely? Unadhani yeye hana moyo? Huyo shosti angekuwa akienda na watoto anabaki kwenye gari na mumewe na kumuambia na mie nataka ku-spend time na wewe coz I miss you! Unadhani baba wa watu angeacha kuchanuka? Na kuna sehemu naziita 'drive in', mnakaa kwenye gari mnacheka peke yenu na kufurahia mandhari. Sio lazima socialization na mumewe ijumuishe watu wengine. Muambie shosti aache kuangalia 'show time' afurahie maisha! Kama wengine wanatokea na waume zao wakicheza na watoto, wa kwake yuko tofauti. Hao wanaocheza na kufanya show ukiambiwa ya jana usiku nyumbani kwao utazimia!
     
  8. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #8
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: May 15, 2006
    Messages: 65,131
    Likes Received: 16,099
    Trophy Points: 280
    Kumbe hilo nalo ni la muhimu eeeh? Sasa kwa nini baadhi ya wadada huwa wanajifanya kama vile halina umuhimu? Au ni mapozi poziano tu?

    Wakati wa courtship jamaa alikuwaje? Manake kama jamaa alikuwa hivyo tokea mwanzo na mdada hakuona ubaya wowote hadi kukubali kuvishwa pete na kuruka ufagio, iweje sasa iwe ishu?
     
  9. King'asti

    King'asti JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Nov 26, 2009
    Messages: 27,047
    Likes Received: 1,247
    Trophy Points: 280
    Pretty umenikumbusha nikiwa mtoto (primary/sec), kuna familia tulikuwa tunasali kanisa moja. Yule baba alikuwa analeta familia yake kanisani, anapaki kwenye bar next to the church. Ibada ikikaribia kuisha anapaki kanisani na kulala garini. Babangu mie alikuwa na excuses za kutokuja church kila siku, lakini hakuwahi kutupeleka church. Imagine, nilikuwa na admire yule baba, na kutamani wangekuwa close na dingi ili wapige wote mtungi sie tukiwa church.
    Kuna familia baba ana ratiba yake ya wknd (labda small house inahusika,lol) na mama ana ratiba yake na wanae! Kuna kijana krismas anaenda mkoa mwingine kusherehekea na marafiki zake na anamuacha mkewe na mwanae washerehekee alone. Afadhali huyo mpelekaji na anasikiliza miziki yake garini. Heri nusu shari mamitto!
     
  10. Michael Scofield

    Michael Scofield JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Jul 30, 2011
    Messages: 1,213
    Likes Received: 3
    Trophy Points: 135
    Da Pretty kwahili mi nitawalahumu sana nyie wenyewe kinadada, Kama hautajishughurisha kwa mwenzi wako, sidhani kama lawama mnazotupa zinakuwa sawa!
    Mwambie huyo dada, Mumewe akirudi ajitahidi kuwa nae karibu, wakiwa pamoja azitafute sehemu chokozi, namaanisha amtie hashiki.
    Yeye mwenyewe ajiweke katika mazingira ya kumtega mzee.

    Sio analalamika kumbe anajifunga mikanga kama bibi, mtoto kamkojolea asubuhi.., mpaka jiono ajabadili nguo, anashinda mchafumchafu.
    Mzee akirudi anamkodolea macho tu! anajifanya yuko bize mpaka mzee analala!
    Akipanda kitandani ndio kabisa hataki kumpapasa mwenzie au yeye akipapaswa hataki.

    Maadamu umekiri hapo juu kuwa jamaa hana tatizo:
    Hile kitu sio mashine kwamba itasimama automatic ni lazima iamshwe.
    Alafu usafi ni muhimu jamani, msione mtu mpaka anazama uvinza ni usafi ule.
     
  11. Sunshow

    Sunshow JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Nov 11, 2011
    Messages: 943
    Likes Received: 7
    Trophy Points: 35
    Inaonekana mapenzi yamepungua. Je walikuwa hivyo wakati wanaanza mahusiano? Jibu ni hapana. Mwanaume hana tatizo ila inaonekana ana mipango mingi na mizuri tu ya jinsi ya kuitunza familia yake mfano kutafuta hela, kazi n.k na hivyo kujisahau kwenye majukumu mengine kama hayo. Mfano kama kila siku unatoka kibaruani umechoka sana huwezi kuwa na hamu ya tendo. Mwanamke ajaribu kuwa karibu na mumewe na ikiwezekana awe sehemu ya hiyo mipango.
     
  12. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #12
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: May 15, 2006
    Messages: 65,131
    Likes Received: 16,099
    Trophy Points: 280
    Ni kama vile ulikuwa kichwani mwangu!

    Sasa hapo huyo mdada usikute yeye ndiyo chanzo cha uhaba wa hayo makutano ya kimwili lakini kwa jinsi binadamu wengi tulivyo, yeye huenda wala hadhani kuwa anaweza akawa ndiyo msababishi wa mwenzake kupungukiwa na hamu ya kukutana naye kimwili aghalabu.
     
  13. Pretty

    Pretty JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Mar 19, 2009
    Messages: 2,582
    Likes Received: 25
    Trophy Points: 135

    .......jamaa kabadilika baada ya kuoana, enzi za uchumba walikuwa wanatoka wote out. Inawezekana alikuwa anajitahidi kufanya hivyo ili ampate mwanamke.
     
  14. cartura

    cartura JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Aug 13, 2009
    Messages: 3,053
    Likes Received: 8
    Trophy Points: 0
    tendo la ndoa ni muhimu na kama kuna tatizo inabidi wasaidiane kutafuta solution (jamaa anaweza kuwa bize sana au nature ya kazi ni so demanding; mazoea yametawala na hakuna tena hamasa kwenye tendo; mama hana initiative anasubiri 'kuombwa' tu kila siku; mazingira na nafasi ya nyumbani etc); mengine yaliyobaki siyo big deal, mama ajitahidi kumsomesha jamaa taratibu, akielewa well and good but ikishindikana asimshinikize coz kimsingi watu tumeumbwa tofauti na haiwezekani wote tu-behave the same way
     
  15. Pretty

    Pretty JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Mar 19, 2009
    Messages: 2,582
    Likes Received: 25
    Trophy Points: 135
    ......hili nalo neno, itabidi afundwe upya mdada.
     
  16. King'asti

    King'asti JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Nov 26, 2009
    Messages: 27,047
    Likes Received: 1,247
    Trophy Points: 280
    Whatever u had for dinner really works! U should avoid fast food,lol!

    Hivi, kama mdada nae anakosa appetite, can we blame the chef?!
     
  17. Losambo

    Losambo JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Nov 8, 2011
    Messages: 2,625
    Likes Received: 8
    Trophy Points: 0
    Matatizo ya huyo mwanaume ni madogo tu bora kama yote anayafanya kwa tabia yake na si kwa sababu ya ana mwanamke mwingine. Pili inategemeana ndani ya nyumba wanawasilianaje katika matatizo yao.
     
  18. Michael Scofield

    Michael Scofield JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Jul 30, 2011
    Messages: 1,213
    Likes Received: 3
    Trophy Points: 135
    Tena huyo mdada ashukuru kwani jamaa inaonyesha ana mapenzi kwa familia ndio maana bado ana care, na inaonyesha bado hajashikwa nje sasa mwache ashangae wajanja wamzidi kete! hata hizo huduma kama hazijaota mbawa.
     
  19. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #19
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: May 15, 2006
    Messages: 65,131
    Likes Received: 16,099
    Trophy Points: 280
    Much to your chagrin, I just had the baconator double topped with juicy applewood smoked bacon in between a premium buttered, toasted bun.

    I also topped it off with mayo, honey dijon mustard, ketchup, and American cheese. Now that's not just a sandwich, but a tasty treat.

    Kukosa hamu ya kula kunaweza kukawa ni dalili ya ugonjwa ama upungufu wa kitu mwilini. Ni vizuri kukaa na kujaribu kutafuta chanzo cha tatizo na ufumbuzi wake!
     
  20. Bishanga

    Bishanga JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Feb 7, 2012
    Joined: Jun 29, 2008
    Messages: 15,349
    Likes Received: 29
    Trophy Points: 0
    Ukute shost wake Pretty huwa anambonda mmewe na ndo maana jamaa anaishiwa nguvu.
     
Loading...