Dismiss Notice
You are browsing this site as a guest. It takes 2 minutes to CREATE AN ACCOUNT and less than 1 minute to LOGIN

Mume bora ni yupi kati ya hawa

Discussion in 'Habari na Hoja mchanganyiko' started by mopaozi, Nov 28, 2011.

  1. mopaozi

    mopaozi JF-Expert Member

    Nov 28, 2011
    Joined: Nov 17, 2010
    Messages: 3,070
    Likes Received: 8
    Trophy Points: 135
    Ninyi mko pande ipi?!!

    TAFAKARI CHUKUA HATUA > > > > > ---


    MR MONKEY : >
    Mr Monkey is only married on paper but in reality he is still a
    > bachelor. He married because of some family pressures, maybe >
    impregnating the girl out of wedlock. Monkey is not responsible, he >
    doesn't realize he is now a man and has a wife and child (ren) to look > after.
    He still hangs around with his bachelor friends. They go out, > braai,
    drink and be merry with young girls and his car pumps out loud >
    music, it's actually a mobile disco. His house is like a lodge to him, >
    he only comes home to sleep. He sleeps out once in a while and has his >
    friends to testify to his wife that he slept at their place after drink > or
    when the car had broken down. He is really a nuisance to the family. > > >

    MR LION :
    He is very violent and is always boiling like acid and suffers >
    from mood swings. His home is run through intimidation and > dictatorship. >
    There are strict rules and regulations for the wife and children and >
    whoever breaks these is thoroughly beaten. His home is run like a high > school.
    There are strict meal times and heavy padlocks at the gate.
    He > takes pride in being in charge and behaves like a high school perfect. >
    Half the time he is engaging in compensatory behaviour verbally and >
    physically abusing his wife and children to compensat6e for his > inadequacies elsewhere especially at the workplace. > >

    This one wants to be treated like an "Igwe'' (a King).
    He > treats his wife and children like his subjects.
    He wants the wife and > children to perform some traditional respect gestures.
    He doesn't want > to be called by his first name. The children found out his first name >
    by > mistake on a utility bill and they enjoy using this name when he is > away >
    and they are gossiping about him. When his food is served, the wife >
    kneels and puts food in front of him and she retreats two metres and >
    kneels again and announces that she has brought the food, as if he is >
    not aware. He eats from plates that have lids. Only the wife knows what >
    he is eating. The children don't. Gorilla has a strong rural background >
    and has a number of beasts at his rural home/farm, where he goes almost >
    every weekend. The cattle are his friends, they are more important than >
    the wife and children for he spends most of his free time with them > than >
    with the family. The cattle are not sold to improve his life;
    he > delights in seeing them multiply and enjoys the numbers.
    He's a very > stingy man. > >

    He is that man who has a soft spot for women. They are his friends, >
    just friends; he has no relationships with them. He is a husband for > every women;
    he doesn't want to see a woman cry and is given to caring > for these other women
    than his own wife. He gives these other women > more > than his wife in terms of his
    resources and time. At the work place, > the > women know him and they take
    advantage of him and take loans they never > payback. > >

    He is very selfish, he thinks about himself first before the >
    family. He is the best dressed in the family. His favourite word is > '
    my'. Everything is HIS - my car, my house, my wife, my children, my > trees,
    my lizards (those that hang around his house). He is a very > greedy man.
    He is heavily involved in what happens in the kitchen, even > knows how
    may slices are in a sliced loaf of bread and how many oranges > are on his oranges tree.
    He doesn't consider the emotions of the wife > and the children. He is a dry man with no sense
    of humour and he rarely > smiles and takes life too seriously. > >

    MR FOX :
    He is a very cunning man. He doesn't care much about the > marriage.
    He is using his wife to solve his own personal and extended > family problems.
    He knows his wife's weaknesses and capitalizes on > these > to use the wife for his personal gain.
    When he needs the wife to do > something, he is friendly and 'loving' and when he gets what he wants >
    he > relapses to his usual dry self. His habits are very fast and his eyes > swift, he won't look at you directly
    in the eye, speaks very fast as if > he is reciting a poem. It's not clear what exactly he does for a living >
    but he is always in town running from one corner to the other. > > MR TICK :Is a very lazy husband.
    He lives off his wife; he is literary > hanging on his wife's skirt. He's stuck to the wife because of her >
    money. He is dependant on the wife as much as the children. He is very > loving in his own way -
    fond of calling the wife all sorts of little > nothings, honey, sweetheart, sweety, lovely and all but
    will siphon > money off the wife and spends it with other women. He has no initiative > and has negated his
    role as a bread winner in the family. > >

    MR PUPPY :
    This is a husband who is a cry baby, very childish and > irresponsible.
    He is mummy's boy. Behaves as if he is married to his > mother.
    He cannot make a decision without consulting his mother (and > sisters).
    His mother and sisters run his home and family. He is always > comparing
    his wife to his mother and expects the wife to behave like > his > mother.
    It is rumoured behind closed doors that maybe the mother > bewitched him
    to make him 'loyal' to her. His sisters are busy trying > to > get him girlfriends
    from among their friends so that they will even > spend more time with him
    through frustrating his wife. A very useless > husband. > >

    There is the visiting husband. Mr Python, a rare species.
    > His house is a lodge. He only comes to sleep. Leaves home when the >
    children are still sleeping and comes back when they are in bed. He is >
    always at work or making 'deals' to make money but unfortunately he has >
    no time for his family. He does provide materially for his family but > he > is always absent. > >

    MR ELEPHANT : Finally there is Mr Elephant, the man who is caring and >
    loving and provides for his family. He will not allow anything to come >
    between him and his family and will fight tooth and nail to protect his > family.
    He tries his best to fend for his family but only through > honest > means.
    He spends most of his spare time with the family and guides his > family spiritually as well.
    A very responsible man who treats his wife > as a partner and cares for the welfare of his in-laws.
    He values the > children as God given gifts to be cherished, with no gender bias. - and >
    I know that all husbands who read this column are Elephants.
  2. mopaozi

    mopaozi JF-Expert Member

    Nov 28, 2011
    Joined: Nov 17, 2010
    Messages: 3,070
    Likes Received: 8
    Trophy Points: 135
    MR MONKEY wapo wengi saaanaa juzk kuna mmoja kachelewa kurudi nyumbani kasingiziia aliibiwa gari hivyo katembea kwa miguu kutoka ukonga hadi ilala usiku wa manane cha kushangaza siku hiyo hiyo kalipata gari!!!
  3. Sniper

    Sniper JF-Expert Member

    Nov 28, 2011
    Joined: Mar 8, 2008
    Messages: 1,942
    Likes Received: 9
    Trophy Points: 135
    Hii ntaisoma asubuhi, saiv niko kilaji maandishi mengi sana

    Il Gambino.
  4. Tony Almeda

    Tony Almeda JF-Expert Member

    Nov 28, 2011
    Joined: Sep 18, 2011
    Messages: 397
    Likes Received: 1
    Trophy Points: 0
    Te te te! gari aliibiwa na kimada?

    BADILI TABIA JF-Expert Member

    Nov 28, 2011
    Joined: Jun 13, 2011
    Messages: 28,094
    Likes Received: 2,766
    Trophy Points: 280
    ilishapostiwa kitaambo MMU hii

    TIMING JF-Expert Member

    Nov 28, 2011
    Joined: Apr 12, 2008
    Messages: 21,798
    Likes Received: 46
    Trophy Points: 145
    mie naona wote wanyama tu, hakuna binadamu hata mmoja??