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Msaada Kwenye Tuta Jamani: Ni Vizuri Kulijua Hili Kabla ya Kuingia Kwenye Ndoa?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by KILITIME, Dec 15, 2009.

  1. KILITIME

    KILITIME JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Dec 15, 2009
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    Wapendwa wanaJF, nimekuwa nikijiuliza mara kwa mara kuhusu kabla mtu hajaingia kwenye ndoa akaambiwa ukweli kwamba mwenzi wake alikuwa na tabia ambazo sio nzuri, kwa mfano umalaya, uhuni, ulevi, kutoa mimba, nk. Je, ni vizuri jamani au itamfanya awe mbali zaidi na mwenzi wake kuliko kujua undani wake? Kwa ujumla: Lipi bora, kujua au kutokujua juu ya tabia au mambo hayo kabla? Msaada tafadhali, msiniulize kama yamenikuta au la!
     
  2. KILITIME

    KILITIME JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Dec 15, 2009
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    Wadau nasubiri hoja zenu zenye nguvu!
     
  3. Penny

    Penny JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Dec 15, 2009
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    Hivyo vyote ulivyotaja bila hata kujificha utavijua tuu maana havijifichi. Ila kwa upande wa kutoa mimba hio ni personal issue, maana wanawake wengi wanaofanya hivyo unakuta ni kwa sababu zisizoweza kuzuilika mf. baba mkali, mimba kukanwa na mtungaji, umri nk. Ni vizuri kujua hivyo vingine maana itakusaidia usiingie kwenye matatizo na ukaamua mapema kufanya uamuzi wa busara.
     
  4. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #4
    Dec 15, 2009
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    Ukali wa baba, mimba kukanwa na mwanamme, umri, n.k. kama ulivyosema sio sababu zisizoweza kuzuilika hadi kufikia uamuzi wa kutoa mimba (kuua binadamu). Ni bogus kabisa kutumia visingizio hivyo na kuondoa uhai wa binadamu asiye na makosa na aliye defenseless!! Shame on all the people who use those lame a.ss excuses to kill unborn babies. Abortion is so wrong on so many levels.
     
  5. Penny

    Penny JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Dec 15, 2009
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    Nikweli kabisa na usemayo my shem, ila vikizidi humchanganya mwanamke kufikia huo uamuzi. Sema unabahati umezaliwa mwanaume...ungelikuwa hata wewe ulishafanga pia. Hakuna binadamu asiyekuwa na dhambi bwana na hii ni moja wapo inayowapa wanawake challenge kubwa sana.
     
  6. Njowepo

    Njowepo JF-Expert Member

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    Dec 16, 2009
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    Kumjua kwa undani zaidi mwandani wako mazuri na mabaya yake ni jambo la maana unaweza kuta alishabort ten times na uzazi umeisha kwa adhabu ya mola.
    Kuna mshikaji yamemkuta baada ya kuoa then ikabidi ampige chini atafute mwingine hasa baada ya kugundua alimdanganya eti yeye bikra wakati alifanya series of abortion
     
  7. IronBroom

    IronBroom JF-Expert Member

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    Dec 16, 2009
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    Utajikiaje ukijakuyafahamu hayo yoote wakati tayari upo kwenye ndoa?My take:ni bora uyafahamu kabla ya kuingia kwenye ndoa ili kama huwezi kuyakubali ule kona.....na kama utaweza kuyakubali na kuishi nayo basi iwe unafanya informed decision ya kuingia kwenye ndoa!In that case nawe usimfiche kitu...akujue!Sio kumjuajua tu mwenzio wakati yako unayaficha.Kila la kheri.
     
  8. Sipo

    Sipo JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Dec 16, 2009
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    Penny, hivi ni bahati kuzaliwa mwanaume? Sababu ni zipi?
     
  9. Ndahani

    Ndahani JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Dec 16, 2009
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    Duuuh! I can imagine.lakini pamoja na yote sioni justification ya kutoa mimba especially kweli ulimwengu wa leo. Ina maana bado watu wanafanya mambo blindly?
     
  10. Ndahani

    Ndahani JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Dec 16, 2009
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    Mimi niligundua kitu fulani ambacho sikukifahamu baada ya kuoa, kilinipa wakati mgumu sana! Kwahiyo kama unaweza kufanya due diligence ambayo iko balanced na itakusaidia kuamua, that is well and good.
     
  11. carmel

    carmel JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Dec 16, 2009
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    Dah, ngoja kwanza!
     
  12. C

    Caroline Danzi JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Dec 16, 2009
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    Sisi kama wanawake we never consider those things why you guys? Hivi kweli kama ulikutana na mimi bar wewe unataka kuchunguza nini tena wakati jibu unalo. Kutoa mimba is none of your business, inawezekana ilitoka yenyewe, au mwenye nayo hakuwa tayari, uwezo mdogo kimaisha, shule kwa ujumla.

    Je source za wanaokwambia una uhakika nazo 100%? Ebu jaribu kuwa fair nyie wanaume huna sababu ya kuchunguza mtu kama unaona ana hitlafu ambayo hutaki quite wewe jichanganye na mtu mwingine. Unafikiri kama alitoa mimba wakati hamjuani itakudhuru vipi wewe. waoji hakuna ndiyo maana sababu nyingi zisizo za msingi.
     
  13. carmel

    carmel JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Dec 16, 2009
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    Ni vizuri kujuana, hilo halina ubishi! lakini practically huwa si rahisi mtu (awe mwanamke au mwanaume) kuelezea vitu vyote wakati wa uchumba hasa vile ambavyo ni negative. ni wachache sana watakaosema walikuwa malaya, wnavuta bangi au madawa ya kulevya, wameshatoa mimba tano nk. So kama mchumba wako yuko ready kukwambia hayo yote, pls msikilize, pima uzito wa issue na fanya decision. Lakini inaweza pia kukuathiri na kupunguza upendo au kukupa wakati mgumu kwenye relationship yenu. Lakini waswahili washasema ukimchunguza sana bata hutaweza kumla, everybody has his/her past, everybody has his/her dark side coz we are all sinners. So better stay on the safe side.
     
  14. Shishi

    Shishi JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Dec 16, 2009
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    sasa hii thread naona imegeuka kuwa kudiscuss utoaji mimba..... hivi nyie wanaume nasi tukiwauliza mimba ngapi zako zilitolewa??? mtajibu?? its both ways eti! is it the biggest crime or sin that a woman cd commit???
     
  15. Shishi

    Shishi JF-Expert Member

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    Dec 16, 2009
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    U nailed it baby... kila mtu na skeletons zake kibao in the closet...ya nini kuzitoa nje!!
     
  16. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

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    Dec 16, 2009
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    Kweli dada. Inakera sana mtu kutafuta taarifa mbaya za mwenzake wakati yeye hayuko tayari kutoa zake. Kuna vitu vya msingi ambavyo ni muhimu kujua mfano kama mmojawapo wa wapenzi ana mtoto au la. Ila kama alishanyofoa au walinyofolewa siyo issue. Suala la msingi kwangu ni kuangalia je, huyu mtu tunapendana (to avoid one sided love) na je, kuna prospects za kuwa na future ya pamoja. Mimi baada ya kuridhika kuwa mke wangu alionekana kuwa rafiki yangu mkubwa na sikuona wasi wasi juu ya mapenzi yetu nikasonga mbele! She wasn't a vargin and I wasn't either! Sikutaka kusumbua akili yangu na kuitesa nafsi kwa vitu ambavyo siyo vya lazima. Tutanatofautiana ila kuna mambo ambayo ni ya msingi. Ni muhimu kuhangaika na hayo badala ya kutafuta taarifa kama vile unataka kuandika vitabu!
     
  17. MduduWashawasha

    MduduWashawasha JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Dec 16, 2009
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    wanasema mtu aliyezoea umalaya,kucheat na vitendo kama hivyo ,she's likely kuendelea navyo hata akiwa ndani ya ndoa.kama unajua tayari ni vyema uchichomoe mapema kabla hayajakukuta yakukukuta.kama huna habari na kimapenzi uko kigoma mwisho wa reli unaweza kuingia.Manake waswahili wanasema "Kama hujui kama mkeo anatandikwa kipara..basi hata kama anatandikwa kwa siri kwako wewe hajatandikwa bado".manake tunayaona mengi mjini lkn tunashindwa kusema
     
  18. Shishi

    Shishi JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Dec 16, 2009
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    i like your name!!!!! halafu hapo nimepotea kidogo.... and i dont agree kuwa once a slut always a slut...watu hubadilika!
     
  19. MwanajamiiOne

    MwanajamiiOne Platinum Member

    #19
    Dec 16, 2009
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    Sijui unamaanisha kujua kwa kuambiwa na muhusika mwenyewe au kuchunguza mwenyewe but all in all I real beleve that some secrets are better remain secrets.
     
  20. Kunta Kinte

    Kunta Kinte JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Dec 16, 2009
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    Du! wakina dada wamekuwa wakali! naogopa hata kutia neno
     
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