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Mke wangu simuelewi kwa miaka 10 ya ndoa, naomba msaada

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by MVUMBUZI, Mar 25, 2011.

  1. MVUMBUZI

    MVUMBUZI JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Mar 25, 2011
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    Rafiki wangu wa karibu sana amenieleza tatizo lake nikaona si vyema kulileta hapa kwa wahenga kwani palipo na wengi hapaharibiki jambo.

    Anasema ameona na mkewe ndoa ya Kikristo miaka 10 iliyopita na kipindi chote cha uchumba aliamua kuto onja chochote hadi ile siku ya ndoa yao ili heshima, uaminifu na adabu iwepo. Baada ya kuona kila mmoja alimweleza mwenzake tabia ambazo hazipendi kama kufokeana hadharani, kupigana n.k. na wakakubaliana kwamba kila mmoja atajitahidi asimwudhi mwenziwe. Miaka 5 ya ndoa ilikuwa mizuri na waliishi kwa kuzingatia misingi waliyoiweka. Baada ya miaka mitano mkewe akaanza zile tabia ambazo ni kero kwa mumewe huku mume akimkumbusha kuwa anakiuka maagano lakini mkewe anaziacha wiki then anarudia tena.

    Mbaya zaidi kuna kipindi mume alisafiri na katika kumpigia mkewe simu kumtakia hali na kumweleza habari za safari mkewe akashindwa kuwa seriuos kuhusu ule ujumbe kwani inaonyesha alikuwa ametingwa labda na TV au na kitu kingine. Hii hali ikawa imemuudhi mumewe na wakawa wanajibizana ki ugomvi ugomvi na hata aliporudi akawa amerudi na uso wa chuki.

    Ilipofika usiku kitandani kana kwamba haelewi kilichomuudhi mumewe mkewe akaamuuliza mbona huongei na mimi kwa furaha? nini kimekuudhi?

    Maswali haya yalimuudhi sana yule mume kwani hakujua mkewe haelewi nini wakati wamegombana jana kwenye simu na hawajasuluhisha.

    Naomba mawazo yenu wana JF je mwanamke kama huyu utamwelewaje? amekupuuza? ameku ignore? au ana matatizo gani?. Na nini cha kumfanya ili awe na approach sahihi?

    Hii ndio maana huyu rafiki yangu amesema hamuelewi mkewe hata baada ya kuwa kwenye ndoa kwa miaka 10 sasa. Naomba msaada wenu,
     
  2. sweetlady

    sweetlady JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Mar 25, 2011
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    mwambie ampeleke kw babu akapate kkombe atamwelewa! Icjekuwa ni wewe then wajfnya ni rafk yko?
     
  3. Mzee wa Rula

    Mzee wa Rula JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Mar 25, 2011
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    Wamezaa watoto wangapi? Je mke wake ameongeza kipato zaidi kabla ya hiyo miaka 10 ya ndoa? Alishawahi kumfumania mumewe kisha jamaa akaomba radhi? Amfuatilie kwa umakini ili ajue source ya kiburi chake. Wanawake wengi japo si wote hujikita katika kutafuta ndoa lakini wakizipata husahau juhudi kubwa waliyotumia katika kujishape ili waonekane wake bora.
     
  4. Mphamvu

    Mphamvu JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Mar 25, 2011
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    Mhm, sidhani kama ni jibu zuri wangu, kuwa serious na matatizo ya watu. Kuhusu kujifanya, unajua kuna watu huwa marafiki kiac kwamba prob ya rafiki wako inakuwa kama yako. Hebu tumpe ushauri mzuri iwezekanavyo bana...
     
  5. Mphamvu

    Mphamvu JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Mar 25, 2011
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    Unajua wakati mwingine kujinunisha si kuzuri sana, mapenzi mema ni pamoja na kuwa muwazi kwa mwenzi wako. Kama mwana aliulizwa ni nini kimemuudhi, halafu badala ya kumueleza wife akakimbilia kwako, kuna walakini hapo. Kingine ni maisha ambayo wamekuwa wakiishi siku zote, inawezekana mshkaji hakuwa mtu wa kukaa na vitu rohoni, thats y wife akachukulia poa... Enewei, mshauri mselako ajaribu kusema na wake kuhusu hilo la juzi waangalie possible measure...
     
  6. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Mar 25, 2011
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    Sasa kama anajua fika mkewe alikua distracted na tv anategemea vipi mkewe achukulie hasira zake serious?Si ajabu hata wakati wanagombana bado akili yake ilikua kwingine!Angekua muungwana kama asingerukia kukasirika zaidi kwa swali la mkewe na badala yake angemwambia kwamba hakufurahia tukio lililopita!Maana inawezekana kabisa mama hajui kuna tatizo!Alafu sijaona kubwa la kufikia kusema hamwelewi mke aliyeishi nae miaka 10..pia ajue watu wanabadilika na muda hivyo afanye hima kubadilika na mkewe!
     
  7. WomanOfSubstance

    WomanOfSubstance JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Mar 25, 2011
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    Mwanaume hanuni ovyo!
    Mwambie ndugu yako aache tabia za kitoto za kununanuna.Atapoteza heshima zaidi kwa mkewe.
     
  8. Next Level

    Next Level JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Mar 26, 2011
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    Duuh mshikaji km hilo nalo tatizo, kazi ipo! Ungesimuliwa matatizo tuliyopitia wengine ungeondoka mara moja na kumbusu mkeo! Huyo hana kiburi, hana kinyongo kabisa! Mmegombana jana yeye mwenzio yaliisha jana hiyo hiyo, kumbe we mwenye matatizo bado unalo donge! We dume ndo mwenye kasoro na unahitaji upewe kikombe cha babu!
     
  9. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Mar 26, 2011
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    mimi kuna mzee aliniambia all women are sycopath.....

    dawa ni wewe mwanaume kudharau tu.
    akikuudhi sana ongeza mke...
     
  10. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Mar 26, 2011
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    You are right...that's why y'all are here today!
     
  11. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Mar 26, 2011
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    lizzy huo msemo sio wangu but upo.
    unaweza hata ku google.....
    so usifikiri ni mimi ndie ninaesema....

    but kudharau mambo madogo ndio dawa.au we unaonaje...?
     
  12. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Mar 26, 2011
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    Bwana wee...watu mia wakirudia kosa hawaondoi kosa!Nwyz mzee anadeka huyo anaonekana...ajifunze kudharau na kupotezea mambo yasiyo na maana kama BOSS alivyosema!
     
  13. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Mar 26, 2011
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    sio mke ajifunze kumdekeza mumewe?????

    au ni wanawake tu ndio wanatakiwa kudeka?
    ha ha lol

    mapenzi ni kudekezana sio???????
     
  14. kisukari

    kisukari JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Mar 26, 2011
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    kama tatizo lenyewe ni hilo tu,naona kama si tatizo kubwa,labda kuwe na mengine.kwa kuwa aliulizwa,badala ya kuendelea kununa,ni vizuri akamfahamisha,isije ikwa na huyo m.me akawa na kasoro zake vile vile,kwani story ipo kwa upande mmoja tu
     
  15. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Mar 26, 2011
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    Mzee kazidi..yani ye anadeka kuliko mama!Tena si ajabu alishaacha kumdekeza mwenzie ndo maana kapotezea malalamiko yako!Ila uko sahihi..mapenzi kudeka na kudekezana!
     
  16. u

    uporoto01 JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Mar 26, 2011
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    huy jamaa f*l* kabisa vitu vidogo kama hivi anataka ushauri wa rafiki yake ? akikuta sms ya mapenzi kwenye simu ya wife si anaweza ua ?
     
  17. C

    Coletha Member

    #17
    Mar 26, 2011
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    yan hiyo si suluhu ni kujiongezea matatizo tu
     
  18. Dena Amsi

    Dena Amsi JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Mar 26, 2011
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    Huyo jamaa ni f*a*a sana ananua wakati mkewe kashamaliza tokea jana yake?? Mie mwanaume wa kununa ananiudhi mimi kha!!! Sijui hajifikirii yeye ni baba wa nyumba?? Dume zima eti limevimbisha mashavu kha kichekesho kweli.

    Mwambie huyo rafiki yako aache ujinga wa kununa hovyo inakuwa kama anamuogopa mkewe kumwambia chochote.
     
  19. Raia Fulani

    Raia Fulani JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Mar 26, 2011
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    Biashara ya kukumbushana viapo inakera. Mtu akikosea kidogo unasikia, 'unakumbuka?' waishi kulingana na siku iliyo mbele yao na wala si vigezo vya zamani. Wanagombana wachumba sembuse hao maveterani?
     
  20. BlackBerry

    BlackBerry JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Mar 26, 2011
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    Looooo dumehili dume gani lika siku makelele,,,,...... nami nalibembeleza kwa kulipikia mchele....... sipendi wanaume wa kununa! unanuna halafu nyumba wakati umenuna nani anaiongoza? utakuta lingine wiki mbili halimsemeshi mwenzake na sie tufanyaje sasa hapo? mke huy kafundwa ya jana kayaacha jana mume karudi anaulizia haki yake hahahahahha
     
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