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Mistari itumikayo katika kutongozea!

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by KakaKiiza, Dec 8, 2011.

  1. KakaKiiza

    KakaKiiza JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Dec 8, 2011
    Joined: Feb 16, 2010
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    Hii ni baadhi ya mistari ambayo utumika kutongozea:-
    Kwa wanawake waliokuwa katika umri wakuanzia 25.......na anakata kinywaji mambo huwa hivi...
    • Dada za kwako samahani sijui hapa naweza kujoin na wewe kama hautajali??
    Dada:Hapana wekaa tuu!
    • Habari za kwako mzima?
    Dada:Mimi mzima siju wewe!
    • Mimi sijambo,mhudumu tafadhali naomba Castle ya barrriiidi msikilize dada anakunywa kinyawaji gani!
    Dada:Hapana kaka nashukuru sana mimi ninacho kinanitosha!
    • Hapana Dada kwani ukinywa moja kutoka kwangu utagombezwa??Please bwana tafadhali sana mhudumu mletee kinywaji anachokunywa!
    Dada:Dah yani yani nilitaka kuondoka naenda kwa fundi unajua asubuhi gari iliniletea matatizo hivyo nataka kuipeleka!!basi naomba Heinken baridi tafadhari.
    • Ahaa pole nini tatizo lagari yako??Basi baada ya hapa kama hautajali nina fundi wa magari yangu naweza kumwambia aje aiangalie tatizo au sijui wewe unaonaje??
    Dada: Hata mimi sijui ila kama unafundi ntakushukuru sana!!
    • Dada wewe unaitwa nani??Mimi naitwa Rejao fingafinga marwa 25 na kazi nafanyia JF
    Dada:Mimi naitwa fasibuku AshaDii!kazi nafanya kazi Jamii saccos Nanyie za kwenu zipo wapi??
    • Dah swali zuri Sisi zipo mjini pale samora utakapo kuta kibao kimeandikwa DELL,Toshiba,HP zote ni office zetu karibu!!
    Dada:Vizuri nimefurahi kukufahamu...................
    • Waiter tuletee kama tulivyo naniitie mchoma nyama,vipi utapenda nyama choma?kuna mbuzi,kitimoto,kuku! sijui utapendelea nini??Mimi binafsi napenda Mbuzi!
    Dada basi wote tule mbuzi.................
    ......................mmh mbuzi mtamu......mwambie mhudumu aniletee heinken hii ya tano ya mwisho na sijui kama nta weza kudrive.......naninakwambia leo wewe utanibeba na mpaka unidrive mpaka home!!!!!
    • Usijali Fasibuku kwakuwa umeshakuwa usiku basi twende na gari yangu hii tutaipaki kwa walinzi wa ofisini kwetu usitie shaka!!...............ulisema unakaa wapi??mwenge?? karibu tunafika.......
    DADA:Ndiyo ila nasikia kuchoka unajua kuchoka!!......unajua kudrive vizuri sijui nani kakufundisha.......kwanini na mimi usinifundishe leo kudrive kama wewe..................


    watalaamu endelezeni.....
     
  2. KakaJambazi

    KakaJambazi JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Dec 8, 2011
    Joined: Jun 5, 2009
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    Dada: Nipe buku tano nataka ninunue vocha,,make nimekuta miss call,,
    . Usijali,,nna hela kwe mpesa apa ,,,nakupunguzia ten kabisa.
     
  3. G

    Gud gud Member

    #3
    Dec 8, 2011
    Joined: Dec 1, 2011
    Messages: 33
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    Mmh demu mchicha kama c maharage ya mbeya!!!
     
  4. K

    Kifulambute JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Dec 8, 2011
    Joined: May 8, 2011
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    Dada: Dah halafu pale kwetu walinzi wananikeraga sana sipendi kama nini...ikifika mida kama hii huwa hawakubali kufungua geti
    . pole sana dada yangu mimi nakaa mwenyewe pale kwangu naingia muda ninaotak

    dada: dah! safi sana dear....kwa leo basi ntalala kwako
    . poa hakuna shaka dear twende tu
    Dada: Nioneshe bafuni bashi dear
    . unataka kuoga?
    Dada: njoo nikwambie dear...huku huku bafuni
    Poa ...mmmh dada umeumbika vizuriiiiii.......
    Dada: Jamani weeeee mtaaamuuuuu...dah! Aaaaaaaaaaaghh shiiiiiiiiiiiii ....mmmmmmmmmhhh.....Ass. As..Assaaaa...n ...nteee. Aaagh!
     
  5. Rejao

    Rejao JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Dec 8, 2011
    Joined: May 4, 2010
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    Dah..KakaKiiza yaelekea upo safi sana kwenye hayo masuala! Wengine midomo ishakuwa mizito tayari!!
     
  6. U

    Ulimakafu JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Dec 8, 2011
    Joined: Mar 18, 2011
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    Hapo hakuna mistari,pochi mbele hiyo.
     
  7. GAZETI

    GAZETI JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Dec 8, 2011
    Joined: Feb 24, 2011
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    Nafikiri jamaa anatafuta somo!
     
  8. Rejao

    Rejao JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Dec 8, 2011
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    Kuna ngoma nyingine haziangalii pochi, sasa hizo watu wenye midomo mizito tunazipataje?
     
  9. DAWA YA SIKIO

    DAWA YA SIKIO JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Dec 8, 2011
    Joined: Dec 8, 2011
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    Hapo tu tayari nimejifunza kutongoza... Unakuwa mpole,dada dada nyiiingi,afu mara kaingia mtaroni.
     
  10. T

    THK DJAYZZ JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Dec 9, 2011
    Joined: Sep 14, 2011
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    Mkaka>>Unajua dada unabahati sana kkutana na mtu maarufu kama mimi THK DJAYZZ sema utakacho nitakupa
    Mdada>>Jaman kumbe ni kweli wewe ni THK nilikuwa nakusikia tu jaman !
     
  11. mysteryman

    mysteryman JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Dec 9, 2011
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    Hahahahaha dah watu nuksi....darasa tosha hilo
     
  12. shizukan

    shizukan JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Dec 9, 2011
    Joined: Jan 16, 2011
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    Hiyo ni namna ya kutongoza kicheche, demu mtamu hatongozwi namna hiyo. Na ndio maana asali ya nyuki wa ulaya sio tamu kama wa hapa kwetu, kwa kuwa wa ulaya hawaumi
     
  13. ndyoko

    ndyoko JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Dec 9, 2011
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    Una uhakika na hiyo maneno ya nyuki wa ulaya kutong'ata.............usimwage upupu kwenye issue za elimu kama hiyo kamanda!
     
  14. kuberwa

    kuberwa JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Dec 9, 2011
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    najua hapo hakuna kuchelewa mtu anapewa dawa ya sikio! Duh wanawake tuko hatarini kweli hatuko salama hapa duniani!
     
  15. TANMO

    TANMO JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Dec 9, 2011
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    Hii mistari ngoja niisevu kwenye kamchina kangu, inaweza kunifaa huko mbeleni, lol.........
     
  16. tobycow

    tobycow Senior Member

    #16
    Dec 9, 2011
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    wote mmeongea lakin cjackia mtajo kondom
     
  17. Jaluo_Nyeupe

    Jaluo_Nyeupe JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Dec 10, 2011
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    unaenda kutongoza huku umebeba kondom usipofanikiwa utaigeuza pulizo?
     
  18. K

    Konya JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Dec 10, 2011
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    daaah!it sound like you did it yesterday, design kama ukawa unajirecord ivi.. we ni mkaree
     
  19. OLESAIDIMU

    OLESAIDIMU JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Dec 10, 2011
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    Dada; Yaani leo hata sijui kinanitokea nini jamani...unajua mi huwa simzoei mtu haraka kiasi hiki......we nimekuzoea na kukuamini leo leo.......unajua mi nishaumizwa sana na wanaume ndo maana huwa sitaki kuwazoea tena na kuwaamini ndo kabisaa sitaki tena mie...nyie wanaume hamuaminiki......!!!!!!!!
     
  20. King Kong III

    King Kong III JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Dec 10, 2011
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    Tobycow we ndo umetoa point::
    Chonde chonde ngoma nomaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ikifa uwezi sikia kabisa
     
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