Dismiss Notice
You are browsing this site as a guest. It takes 2 minutes to CREATE AN ACCOUNT and less than 1 minute to LOGIN

Miongoni mwa mambo yanayomdalilisha Mwanamke,hili limo!!!!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Eiyer, Mar 3, 2012.

  1. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Apr 17, 2011
    Messages: 27,196
    Likes Received: 643
    Trophy Points: 280
    Nimejaribu kufikiria sana kuhusu ndoa zenye mateso na kusababisha vifo,mara nyingi wahanga ni wanawake!Na moja ya mambo yanayosababisha ni MAHARI.Wapo wanaume pengine kutokana na malezi yao au akili zao kuwa na matege wamekua wakiwafanya wanawake kama punching bag,punda wa kazi(hii iko sana vijijini,mwanamke ndie analima huku mume anashinda vilabuni),wanawafuja n.k,haya na mengine wamekuwa wakitendewa mama zetu,dada zetu n.k kwa sababu tu walilipiwa mahari.Nimejaribu kuitafuta mantiki ya mahari nimeikosa!Mahari ni gharama ya nini?Je ni gharama ya makuzi?Kama ni hivyo basi ulipaji mahari ni biashara kama ilivyo biashara yoyote!Na kama tujuavyo unapo NUNUA chochote kinakuwa MALI yako!Je ni halali hii?Si kuwadhalilisha wanawake?Na kama hii siyo tafsiri sahihi ya mahari ipi ni sahihi?Wanawake wamekuwa wakihesabiwa MALI ya wanaume na wamekua wakipata kila aina ya uchafu kwa sababu tu mwanaume anamhesabu mwanamke kama bidhaa yae,hivyo anaitumia kama atakavyo!Naamini kila mmoja akichunguza hili ataliona.Sasa,hivi haiwezekani mahari ikaondolewa?Je kwenye dini mahari ni lazima?Ni nini tafsiri ya mahari kwa mujibu wa dini?Je ukiacha kutoa mahari ni dhambi?Mi nafikiri tutoke kwenye mazoea na tufikiri tofauti.Mahari kama inaleta matatizo kwa wanawake iondolewe!Mtazamo wangu!
     
  2. MadameX

    MadameX JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Dec 27, 2009
    Messages: 7,848
    Likes Received: 41
    Trophy Points: 145
    Kama ni muislam mahari ni sunna, yaani inaulazima fulani. Haifungwi ndoa bila kutolewa mahari, tofauti inakuwa ni kile kiwango, mahari hasa tafsiri yake ni zawadi kwa mwanamke na ubora wa mahari ikiwa ndogo. Hii ni kuepuka mambo ya udhalilishaji na katika sheria za mahari huwa haigawiwi kwa babu, bibi, mjomba wala mama, hii ni kwa binti zaidi ili anunue anachokitaka kwa maandalizi ya harusi.

    Na pia kuna tamaduni za kitanzania ambazo mahari/mali hutumika kama desturi na si kidini. Swali langu ni hivi, udhalilishaji wa mwanamke ni tabia ya mtu/mume, kuna wale wanaokotana vichochoroni wakaamua waishi kama mke na mume hapo hakuna mahari wala mali iliyotolewa lakini pia unakuwa tabia ya UDHALILISHAJI wa mwanamke bado upo. Bwana kurudi usiku wa maanane huku amelewa na kuanza punching his wife na mengineyo mengi including masimango hata kwenye chakula.
     
  3. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Apr 17, 2011
    Messages: 27,196
    Likes Received: 643
    Trophy Points: 280
    Thanx Madam x,but kumbuka kuwa watanzania wengi wanaishi kijijini ambako imani za dini ni kama hazipo na kama kuna mahali zipo bado mila zina nguvu zaidi na hapo ndipo unakuta mahari za ng'ombe mpaka 70!Sehemu kama hizi nini kifanyike ili kumwokoa mwanamke anaeteseka kwa mgongo wa mahari?
     
  4. G

    GENDAEKA Member

    #4
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Feb 27, 2012
    Messages: 98
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    Mahari 1.m!hii ni biashara!na ukitoa c unatoka kwenye umasikini na kuwa hohehahe?
     
  5. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Apr 17, 2011
    Messages: 27,196
    Likes Received: 643
    Trophy Points: 280
    Wanaume tukiendelea na mawazo ya aina hii,tutamwona mwanamke kama bidhaa tu,utu wake utapotea!
     
  6. Angel Nylon

    Angel Nylon JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Jul 26, 2011
    Messages: 4,199
    Likes Received: 626
    Trophy Points: 280
    kawaida ni km sheria, utamwambia nani saivi kwamba kuwe na ndo bila mahari? Na mahari ya huko vijijini ndo hayasemeki na cha kusikitisha zaidi wazee hasa wa kiume ndo wasababishaji wakubwa wa kudhalilika kwa hao mabinti zao mana hutolesha mahari kubwa halafu sifkiri km hata huyo m'ke anafaidika kwa lolote kabla na baada ya ndoa. Kwa kweli tukifuata mahari km tulivoelekezwa kwenye dini ndo mpango mzima. Mwenyezi Mungu mwenyewe ana hikma juu ya kila jambo alopanga lkn sisi b'dam ndo wachakachuaji matokeo yake ndo km hayo.
    Na dunia ya sasa ukifuata dini utaonekana mjinga mshamba ushapitiwa na wakati, ushazeeka.
     
  7. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Mar 21, 2011
    Messages: 36,152
    Likes Received: 177
    Trophy Points: 145
    mahari ni lazima na ni heshima.
     
  8. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Apr 17, 2011
    Messages: 27,196
    Likes Received: 643
    Trophy Points: 280
    Fafanua uhalali wa mahari!
     
  9. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Oct 18, 2008
    Messages: 16,275
    Likes Received: 115
    Trophy Points: 160
    Mahari kweli ni janga,

    Kuna dada mmoja huko kijijini kwetu aliachana na mume wake baada ya kumfumania na nyumba ndogo mara kibao...Mume alipokuja nyumbani kuyamaliza, mke akakataa kabisa kabisa kurudi kwa mume.

    Baba mkwe akajaribu kutumia nguvu kumlazimisha binti yake arudi kwa mume kwa sababu bado alikuwa anadai sehemu mahali....Kama si baadhi ya ndugu kuingilia kati, dada wa watu alikuwa karibu arudi kwa mume na kuendelea na manyanyaso!!

    Babu DC!!
     
  10. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Oct 18, 2008
    Messages: 16,275
    Likes Received: 115
    Trophy Points: 160
    Dada Mkuu,

    Hata tohara kwa wanawake wa baadhi ya makabila ni lazima, halali na heshima.

    Unakubaliana nayo?

    Babu DC!!
     
  11. data

    data JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Apr 9, 2011
    Messages: 11,599
    Likes Received: 1,504
    Trophy Points: 280
    ..ntachangia J3... Jioni.
     
  12. King'asti

    King'asti JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Nov 26, 2009
    Messages: 27,045
    Likes Received: 1,240
    Trophy Points: 280
    Mahari ni utamaduni wa kiafriaka. Nadhani nia yake ilikuwa kujenga undugu na pia kujaribu kuona kama huko binti aendako wanaweza kumtunza walau? Inapotumiwa kama biashara madhara yanakuwa makubwa zaidi. Kabila langu, mahari ni kama symbol tu isiyotiliwa maanani sana (unaweza kudaiwa sh 100 kwa ajili ya kununua ng'ombe 6)
    Chanzo cha kumnyanyasa mwenza hakihusiani na mahari wala nini! Hicho ni kisingizio tu ku-justify ufirauni wa mtu. Watu wangapi hawajalipa mahari wala kufunga ndoa na wanawa-abuse wenza wao vibaya sana? Wanaume wangapi wanapiga girlfriends zao? Na psychologists wanasema abuser haachi, na atatumia sababu inayowezekana kuhalalisha. The first time ur partner hits you, take a walk! Waliokula mahari watajibeba walipe!
     
  13. BADILI TABIA

    BADILI TABIA JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Jun 13, 2011
    Messages: 28,293
    Likes Received: 3,069
    Trophy Points: 280
    mahari haimdhalilishi mwanamke kinachomdhalilisha ni uji-nga wa kukubali kukubali kuolewa na mwanaume abusive huku akiwa anajua kuwa mwanaume huyo ni mpigaji, muoneaji, mdhalilishaji nk.
     
  14. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Mar 21, 2011
    Messages: 36,152
    Likes Received: 177
    Trophy Points: 145
    mahari haidhuru baiolojia ya mtu
    tohara inadhuru sana bailojia

    sioni kama vinafanana.

    Kuhusu mahari, ni appreciation kwa wazazi na binti mwenyewe.

    Tena ikiwa nyingi ndo napenda zaidi, lazima mwanamme anayetaka kuoa aoneshe komitimenti, sio kuanza oooh kubwa mara ooh sijui nini.

    Atatunzaje familia bila kuwa mtu wa kukomaa?

    Ni bora harusi iwe ndogo au ya watu wanne tu lakini mahari ilipwe kwa usahihi wake kulingana na tamaduni za eneo husika.

     
  15. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Apr 17, 2011
    Messages: 27,196
    Likes Received: 643
    Trophy Points: 280
    Mimi najiuliza sana,hivi mtu hawezi kuolewa bila mahari?Mahari inaonekana inatafsirika tofauti kwa watu,na namna ya kumtafuta kila mtu na kumuelewesha tafsiri sahihi ya mahari ni tatizo!Na tafsiri hiyo mbovu isababisha vifo kwa wanawake je jambo hili tuliache tu kwa sababu ni heshima kwa baadhi ya makabila?
     
  16. A

    Ave Ave Maria JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Apr 22, 2011
    Messages: 10,761
    Likes Received: 22
    Trophy Points: 0
    Mwanamke wa kupewa bure nae ni mwanamke?? Huyo hata kwao wamemchoka!!! Dah.....hayo ni maneno ya mwanamme mwenzio Eiyer, akimdharau mwanamke aliyeolewa bila mahari!!!
     
  17. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Oct 18, 2008
    Messages: 16,275
    Likes Received: 115
    Trophy Points: 160
    Mimi kwa jinsi ninavyowependa wajukuu zangu....sikuwahi kupokea mahari hata senti kutoka kwa mama zao...

    Afterall, sikutozwa mahari hata senti kumuoa bibi yao!!

    Nadhani tuanzie hapo, kila mtu mwenye binti aachane na mahari hata kama yangemfutia umasikini wake wote!!

    Babu DC!!
     
  18. Dark City

    Dark City JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Oct 18, 2008
    Messages: 16,275
    Likes Received: 115
    Trophy Points: 160
    Tena afadhali maneno kama hayo yasemwe na wanaume...katika jamii zetu, wanawake ndio wanaotumika kuwanyanyapaa wanawake wenzao...mfano mzuri ni mambo ya ukeketaji!!

    Babu DC!!
     
  19. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Mar 3, 2012
    Joined: Mar 21, 2011
    Messages: 36,152
    Likes Received: 177
    Trophy Points: 145
    huyo ni 'reject' ya ukoo

    huwezi hata jisifu mbele ya wenzio 'nimeoa'
    bure??? Heaven No.

    Hata hao wazungu ambao hawana mahari kabisa, bado kuna ma-abusive husband.

    Hiyo kupigwa ni akili ya mwanamme mwenyewe tu
    sioni mahari inachangiaje hapo.

     
  20. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Mar 4, 2012
    Joined: Apr 17, 2011
    Messages: 27,196
    Likes Received: 643
    Trophy Points: 280
    Babu DC,nakubaliana na wewe,mahari iondolewe kabisa kwani wengine wameifanya ni mradi,mkewe akijifungua mtoto wa kike anahesabu ng'ombe kadhaa ameshapata,halafu hizo ng'ombe zinageuka kilio kwa mtoto!Yakimshinda huko na kuamua kurudi kwa wazazi wake,baba anamrudisha kwa mumewe bila kuhoji,mtoto wa kike anarudi kwa mume katili anaendelea na ndoa ya mateso!Baba anaogopa kumhoji mwanae akihofia kunyang'anywa ngombe 40 alizopewa kama mahari.Kwake ng'ombe 40 zina thamani kuliko utu wa mwanae!Mambo ya namna hii yanatokea kwa wingi sana kwa kivuli cha ndoa na mahari!Mungu atusamehe sana kwa upuuzi huu!
     
Loading...