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Mchaga apata ajali Switzerland

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by Sikonge, Mar 19, 2010.

  1. Sikonge

    Sikonge JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Mar 19, 2010
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    Kuna kaka mmoja wa Kichaga alikuja kumtembelea ndugu yake hapo Zurich.

    Kukaa pale kama siku tatu akaanza kuzoea na kuamua kutoka siku moja kwenda kutembea peke yake mjini. Jamaa kwa kuwa alikuwa mcha Mungu sana basi kabla ya kuondoka akasali kwanza na ndipo akaanza matembezi. Ila akajisahau kuwa huku magari yanaenda kwa kutumia mkono wa kulia. Akiwa hajui hili wala lile alibebwa na gari na mkanda wa film ukakatika. Ambulance ilikuja na kumchukua kumpeleka hospital.

    Mangi kaamka baada ya kama siku mbili. Akafungua macho na anashangaa kuwa kila kitu ni cheupe. Mashuka meupe, kuta nyeupe, kimya kabisaaa. Akaanza kujikumbusha nini kilitokea mara ya mwisho. Ndipo akakumbuka kuwa aligongwa na gari na ahhhh.................................
    Akaanza kusikia njaa kali na kwa mbali akamuona mwanamke kavaa nguo nyeupe na mwenyewe mweupeeeeeee...... Mangi akafahamu kuwa huyo ndiyo atakuwa mmoja ya wale alikuwa akiwasoma kwenye biblia.

    Akaamua kumwita : "Aiseee dada Malaika, hebu n-patie sahani ya mto..? mtori kweliii.........."

    Weekend nje? njema kweli.
     
  2. Chimunguru

    Chimunguru JF-Expert Member

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    Mar 19, 2010
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    Duh haya shemeji zangu kazi kwenu, kumbe mna dream mtaukuta mtori akhera haha tehe
     
  3. Maria Roza

    Maria Roza JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Mar 19, 2010
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    Hehhe hehhe lol!
     
  4. Sikonge

    Sikonge JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Mar 19, 2010
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    Kwani ungelikuwa wewe mkuu, ungelimuomba nini Malaika?

    Kuna kigogo mmoja hapa Bongo nina imani angelimuomba Malaika, mhhh mhhh!!!! Sorry, watoto hawajalala.
     
  5. Magulumangu

    Magulumangu JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Mar 19, 2010
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    kuna mhaya mmoja alikwenda huko Ulaya...sasa kuona snows kibao akauliza duh...kuna jamaa angu anafanyaga kabiashara ka mabarafu akija huku atafaidi kweli,halo itabidi nimpigia tunaweza fanya biashara kweli huku...haikuishia hapo...kwenda mbele akaingia kwenye underground cross road hapo ndo akatoa ya millenium aloposema >..HALO MAKARIAKOO HAPA YAPO MENGI sana...
     
  6. Magulumangu

    Magulumangu JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Mar 19, 2010
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    ningemuomba pipi ya kijiti tu au wanaita lollpopu vile...
     
  7. senator

    senator JF-Expert Member

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    Mar 19, 2010
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    Hivi kwa wachaga Mtori ndo main Dish katika mlo wao?
     
  8. Sikonge

    Sikonge JF-Expert Member

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    Mar 20, 2010
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    Ahh, Wachaga Mtori ni kwa kuanzia. Ni kama uji.

    [​IMG]
     
  9. senator

    senator JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Mar 20, 2010
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    Dah Upo juu Sikongee..mate yananitoka kwa kuona hiyo ndimu hapo:D Ndo maana wamama wakichaga wakitoka kwnye uzazi mwndo ni mtori tu basi wanafutuka haswaa...
     
  10. cheusimangala

    cheusimangala JF-Expert Member

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    Mar 20, 2010
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    namiss hii ki2 jamani.lol
     
  11. Z

    Zeddie Member

    #11
    Mar 22, 2010
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    Duh Mate kibao mdomoni hi kitu hii ni hatali sana ndani kuna nyama kibaoooo usipime
     
  12. Asprin

    Asprin JF-Expert Member

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    Mar 22, 2010
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    Dah kumbe ushaondoka sikonge siku hizi unabeba mabox Zurich?

    Tuwe tunaagana basi kiongozi.
     
  13. FirstLady1

    FirstLady1 JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Mar 22, 2010
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    hahaha ni Jmos tu nimetoka kuipelekea ooh home sweet home
     
  14. Injinia

    Injinia JF-Expert Member

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    Mar 22, 2010
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    And when waChagga come up with some nasty jokes about y'all what will you say? That they are tribalistic?
     
  15. Sikonge

    Sikonge JF-Expert Member

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    Mar 22, 2010
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    Mkuu Chrispin,

    Ndiyo matatizo ya Copy and paste.

    Sikonge nimuachie nani? Mie na Sikonge ni kama Mmakonde na kupenda chini, tetee (inasemekana Mtwara hakuna madangulo kwa sababu hiyo).
     
  16. Sikonge

    Sikonge JF-Expert Member

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    Mar 22, 2010
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    Huo utani aliandika Mchomvu anayeishi huko. Sasa ukitaka kumshambulia Mpare si wewe shambulia tu? Inanihusu nini mie? Mjumbe hauwawi ati.

    Ukija na utani wako mkali, tutameza tu mate kwa uchungu na kusema "that one was real good."
     
  17. U

    Ubungoubungo JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Mar 22, 2010
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    nimecheka sina mbavu.
     
  18. Jerome

    Jerome Senior Member

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    Mar 22, 2010
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    Du! Mwanangu ase huo mtori mate yananito-toka kweli,yaani hapo ungeweka na serenget bariiiidi moja au mbili huyo mchaga angpona tehe tehe tehe tehe,mpeni mpwa wenu Chris
     
  19. Sikonge

    Sikonge JF-Expert Member

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    Mar 23, 2010
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    Jirani yake Chris aliamua kuja Dar wakati wa likizo. Alipoteremka pale Railway Station (miaka hiyooo) basi akatoka hadi kile kituo cha mabasi karibu na Railway Station na akaamua kumpigia simu kaka yake aje amchukue:

    Kaka: Sasa Masawee, uko wapi sasa hivi n'je n'kufuate?
    Masawe: (akaachia simu inaning'inia na huku akionyesha kwa mikono)....n'lipotoka pale Station, n'lichukua mkunjo wa kwanza kushoto, baadaye n'kachukua mkunjo wa pili kulia na mwisho n'kachukua tena mkunjo wa tatu kulia na n'kaja hapa kwenye kijumba cha Posta (kibanda cha simu) n'kakupigia simu.
    .........................
    Baada ya mazungumzo ya shida saana, mwisho kaka yake kwa mbali akasikia jamaa alipo na akaja kumfuata. Baada ya likozo, Masawe akarudi Moshi na kufika huko akaanza kusimulia:
    Masawe: Asieee Dar, wana KENSHUU nyingi! Yaani zipo kila sehemu na ni ndefu kweli kweli (KNCU ni ghorofa pekee miaka hiyo Moshi).

    NB: Serengeti baridi siyo, hiyooo hapo chini.
    [​IMG]
     
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