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Kwa Wanandoa tu: "Vijimambo vya Kuifanya Ndoa Yako Iwe Kama 'Paradiso Ndogo!'"

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Buchanan, Jan 20, 2010.

  1. Buchanan

    Buchanan JF Diamond Member

    #1
    Jan 20, 2010
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    Wapendwa wanaJF ambao mmefunga pingu za maisha, vipo 'vijimambo' vidogo vidogo ambavyo wanandoa wanaviacha au kuvipuuzia na hatimaye kukuta upendo mliokuwa nao tangu mwanzo wa ndoa yenu graph yake inashuka siku hadi siku. Hapa nimetumia neno 'vijimambo' kwa sababu havionekani kwamba ni vya maana sana! Kumbuka hapa nazungumzia ndoa takatifu, sio ukimada!
    Nianze na mfano ufuatao: "Priscilla na Michael walioana kwa muda mrefu, lakini upendo wao wa mwanzo ulizidi kuporomoka na waligombana mno kila siku mpaka walifikia mahali pa kunyimana hadi unyumba. Priscilla alidai baadaye kwamba 'hajisikii' tena kumpenda Michael. Mwanzo wa ndoa yao walielewana sana, maneno kama 'sorry honey', 'I love you,' 'I miss you', nk yalikuwa hayaishi midomoni.
    Siku moja Priscilla alienda kwa Buchanan kuomba ushauri ili atafute namna ya kuachana na Michael! Buchanan alimshauri kwamba njia nzuri ya kumwacha ni hii ifuatayo: amfanyie mambo mazuri sana ndani ya wiki mbili, mambo hayo yawe ni yale ambayo hajawahi kumfanyia. Haijalishi kwamba Michael tabia yake imebadilika au la. Baada ya wiki mbili, ndipo amwambie kwamba anamwacha Michael.
    Kweli Priscilla alipokea ushauri na kuamua kuufanyia kazi. Na kwa wakati huo Michael alishaanza tabia ya kuchelewa kurudi nyumbani na mara nyingine alilala kusikojulikana! Baada ya Wiki moja ya Priscilla kumkaribisha vizuri, kumwogesha, kutokula chakula eti mpaka mume wake arudi, kumsimulia matukio ya siku ile, kumwomba msamaha kwamba eti hakusikia wakati anaingia, nk tabia ya Michael ilianza kubadilika ghafla.
    Baada ya wiki mbili Priscilla alienda kumwona Buchanan kama walivyokubaliana kwamba waonane ili kumjulisha kama wameshaachana. Walipoonana Buchanan alimuuliza kama walishaachana na Michael, lakini Priscilla alimwambia maneno machache: 'I have fallen in Love with Him Again, kwa hiyo siwezi kumwacha, ngumu sana kumwacha.' Ndivyo Buchanan alivyookoa ndoa ya Priscilla na Michael!"
    Ushauri: Wanandoa msisahau 'vijimambo' katika ndoa, vitaifanya ndoa yenu ionekanae mpya kila siku! Usisubiri u-fall in love out of nothing! Hiyo itakuwa ni tamaa ya mwili ambayo inakuwepo kwa kitambo tu na baadaye inatoweka. Acha hisia za mwili ziletwe na 'matendo mazuri' yaani 'vijimambo!' Honeymoon forever! Have a great day!
     
  2. drphone

    drphone JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jan 20, 2010
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    ndoa aina fomula maalumu anvyoishi fulana ukipaste kwakwo itakuwa tatizo
     
  3. Buchanan

    Buchanan JF Diamond Member

    #3
    Jan 20, 2010
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    Umeshaanza kuharibu mada hii!
     
  4. PakaJimmy

    PakaJimmy JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Jan 20, 2010
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    Good stuff!
    Inasaidia kuamsha moto wa penzi ndani ya wanandoa wanaojisahau!
     
  5. Pretty

    Pretty JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jan 20, 2010
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    .......Kweli kabisa ndoa mara nyingi inabomolewa na wanandoa wenyewe, ndio maana wanandoa watakiwa kila siku kuwa wabunifu ili kuweka ndoa yako ionekane mpya kila leo.
     
  6. Buchanan

    Buchanan JF Diamond Member

    #6
    Jan 20, 2010
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    Sure, ukiona mwanaume anaanza ktmwita mke wake "we mwanamke" badala ya "mke wangu" ujue chombo kimeshaanza kwenda mramba! Kuna mtu aliwahi kuniambia mkiwa wanandoa msikue, mbaki watoto siku zote! Alidai yeye na mkewe huwa wanacheza "ready" chumbani, wanafinyana, nk ili mradi wafanye maisha yawe happy! Hakuna "ubosi" chumbani!
     
  7. Teamo

    Teamo JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jan 20, 2010
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    Inaonekana hao couples hawakuwa na watoto..!halafu the whole marriage looks SO WESTERNISED...
     
  8. Buchanan

    Buchanan JF Diamond Member

    #8
    Jan 20, 2010
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    So?
     
  9. Fisherscom

    Fisherscom JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jan 20, 2010
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    ....ni ushauri wa msingi sana huo. Ili ndoa idumu inatakiwa ionekane kuna 'vijimambo' vipya mara kwa mara. Kukosoana kwenye makosa kwa amani,kujadili matatizo ya famikia kwa uwazi na kuyapatia ufumbuzi kabla ya kulala ili mtakapoaka asubuhi mnaanza na mapya mazuri angalau kutaja machache.
     
  10. O

    Orche Senior Member

    #10
    Jan 20, 2010
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    Kinga ya ndoa ni upendo wa kweli, na sumu ya ndoa ni ubinafsi. Ndoa ni kila moja kujitoa nafsi yake kwa ajili ya mwenzake kwa kila namna na kila hali ya maisha.
     
  11. Buchanan

    Buchanan JF Diamond Member

    #11
    Jan 20, 2010
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    Umenena maneno machache lakini yamejaa ujumbe mzito sana ndugu, ubarikiwe na BWANA!
     
  12. Jayfour_King

    Jayfour_King JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Jan 20, 2010
    Joined: Nov 15, 2009
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    Kuna vitu katika maisha havihitaji mazoea na badala yake yanahitaji ubunifu, ubunifu ukishindikana umakini unatakiwa kwa maana ya kufanya yale yale mazuri ambayo tayari yanafanya vizuri sokoni.

    Uzoefu wangu mdogo katika mambo ya ndoa na sio yangu pekee ni pamoja na marafiki zangu wachache ambao niko huru kuwaambia ninavyofanikiwa katika ndoa, ninavyoshindwa katika ndoa, ninavyokwazwa katika ndoa etc. Nao hufanya hivyo kwangu.

    Kubwa ni pale ambapo mama anakuwa na majukumu mengi ya kikazi na kifamilia kwa pamoja. Kinachotokea hapa ni kwamba wao ni watu wawili (mke na mume) na mwili mmoja kama inavyofahamika na ilivyorejewa kwenye maandiko.Pamoja na kuwa mwili mmoja (kinadharia) ki kweli kwa sababu za mama nilizoeleza hapo juu they sharing different experience in a real times.

    Mama kutokana na majukumu yake mengi na hisia ya kibinadamu inamtuma aone kwamba kwa kuwa anachofanya ni tangible na mwenzake anaona, haoni shida wakati baba unapapasa akwambie kwamba kwa kweli leo nimechoka! Naamini shida yaweza kuanzia hapa kwa sababu mdau (mume) kama kwa kawaida huna makuu waweza kaa kimya ukiwa umekwazika!

    Katika hili wengine huamua kiafrika zaidi (anahitaji mwenzake huyu) na hisia kwamba mwenzangu hanijali huanzia hapa. Kikweli mama wakati mwingine yuko busy na watoto hata kama ni mama wa nyumbani, mzee unakuwa umetoka kwenye yale mambo yetu (maongezi ya jioni) yaliyojiri huna taarifa wewe unataka mambo, yakishindikana unahukumu (nyumba ndogo).

    Ingekuwa rahisi sana kama mama angekuwa kwa mfano, kwa sababu za kibinadamu akamkwaza baba na akajua hivyo, basi japo kwa wasaa mwingine ajaribu kumueleza mwenza hali halisi kwamba baba chanja huwenda jana nilikukwaza nisamehe sikuwa na nia mbaya ilinitokea kama binadamu, ikapatikana nafasi hiyo naamini mambo yanaweza kwenda vyema tena. Vinginevyo kila siku, kila mtu atamuona mwenzie anamkwaza na ndio huwa mwanzo wa matatizo.

    NAWASILISHA.
     
  13. FirstLady1

    FirstLady1 JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Jan 21, 2010
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    Buchaman mie pia nataka ndoa yangu iwe paradise ndogo ever ..
    lakini huwa kuna vijimambo ,vidudumtu na mengineyo vinaingilia ndoa ndo inapotokea mmomonyoko wa maadili katika ndoa
    Tusisahau kukabidhi maisha yetu kwa mungu
     
  14. Teamo

    Teamo JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Jan 21, 2010
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    ni mawazo tu mkuu wangu!
    jazba za nin sasa?
     
  15. FirstLady1

    FirstLady1 JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Jan 21, 2010
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    bwana harusi mtarajiwa pole
     
  16. Buchanan

    Buchanan JF Diamond Member

    #16
    Jan 21, 2010
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    Sorry, FL1, kama hutajali, naomba ufafanue juu ya maneno (in red) hayo hapo juu ili niweze kutoa ushauri wangu, kama nitaweza!
     
  17. Buchanan

    Buchanan JF Diamond Member

    #17
    Jan 21, 2010
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    Sio jazba, ni kaswali tu ka kawaida!
     
  18. Lyangalo

    Lyangalo JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Jan 21, 2010
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    Swali la msingi wengi wetu tunaingia kwenye ndo kutokana na upendo wa kweli au kwa sababu umempiga mimba mtoto wa watu sasa unazima moto?
     
  19. T

    Tongue blister JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Jan 21, 2010
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    Mkuu Buchanan !! wewe upo kwenye fungu gani katika hili ? Na una amini nini katika ndoa ?
     
  20. b

    benedicto New Member

    #20
    Jan 21, 2010
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    Thank u for graet massage about marriage and Love does not ask why always.
    have a nice day.
     
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