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Kwa nini wanaume huwa ni wenye kujisifu sana katika mahusiano kuliko wanawake?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Mzee wa Rula, Oct 18, 2011.

  1. Mzee wa Rula

    Mzee wa Rula JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Oct 18, 2011
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    Kuna kitu huwa kinanishangaza sana toka kwa wanaume, yaani inapotokea mwanaume ana uhusiano wa kimapenzi na msichana basi tulio wengi hujiona kama ndiyo tunanafaidi sana na kupelekea kujisifu wazi wazi. Hii ya kujisifu kuwa fulani labda ni demu wangu inaweza isiwe kero , kero yenyewe ni pale mtu anaposijifu jinsi alivyofanya mapenzi na huyo mtu wake na kujikuta anatoa siri za chumbani ambapo hazijafuata mkondo sahihi kutoka. Mkondo ninauokusudia ni kama vile, kuomba ushauri, kusuluhisha ambapo katika kutafuta ushauri au kusuluhisha baadhi ya siri za wapenzi hujikuta zimetoka. Hili limejithibitisha sana kwa vijana ambao bado hawajaoa na wanaume wengi wenye ndoa lakini wana nyumba ndogo.
    Swali langu kwa nini wanaume tunakuwa tunajisifu sana kama vile wanawake hawafaidi kabisa katika mchakato wote wa mapenzi? Sababu ni nini hasa?
    Nawasilisha kwa mabingwa wa saikolojia na mahusiano waniweke vizuri.
     
  2. m

    mkalagale Member

    #2
    Oct 18, 2011
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    demu anafanyiwa dume linafanya kuna tofauti kubwa sana japo kuwa sio ustaarabu kujisifu ila demu hawezi kujisifu kwa sababu anafanyiwa
     
  3. mikatabafeki

    mikatabafeki JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Oct 18, 2011
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    ni ulimbukeni tu na kutojiamni mbele za wenzie
     
  4. Mzee wa Rula

    Mzee wa Rula JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Oct 18, 2011
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    Kwani akifanyiwa harufahii? Kama mnafurahi wote iweje wewe uanze kujitapa kama vile wewe ndiyo umefaidi sana kuliko yeye? Logic yako ya kufanya na kufanyiwa bado naikataa,
     
  5. Mzee wa Rula

    Mzee wa Rula JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Oct 18, 2011
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    Sasa ina maana wanaume wengi basi hatukui maana ulimbukeni kuna kipindi unakwisha, what is so special hapa jamani?
     
  6. Mzee wa Rula

    Mzee wa Rula JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Oct 19, 2011
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    Vipi mabingwa wa saikolojia mbona siwaoni mnisaidie kwa hili.
     
  7. Cantalisia

    Cantalisia JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Oct 19, 2011
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    Ni ushamba tu kwa mwanaume wa kujisifia anavyofanya mapnz na mpnz/mkewe,coz huna uhakika km anaaenjoy km unavyofikiri na kujipa sifa kibao,utakuta anakutwisha misifa kibao kumbe kuna mwingine ndio anamkuna kuliko ww na katulia pemben anakuchora tu,achen tabia mbaya ya kutoa siri za chumbani hadharani km vipi elezeeni na madhaifu yenu na sio sifa tu!
     
  8. Mabagala

    Mabagala JF-Expert Member

    #8
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    hivi wadada huwa hawaongei kweli na mashost zao baada ya mechi? hasa mechi za mchangani!
     
  9. gango2

    gango2 JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Oct 19, 2011
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    sio wanaume wote ni kundi fulani la vijana wakiume. tena wale wanaoishi katika makundi
     
  10. Safety last

    Safety last JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Oct 19, 2011
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    Kuna dada mmoja alijisifu kwa wenzake kwamba ninamkuna na kumtwanga vizuri kila mmoja alinitafuta kwa wakati wake na nikawakuna ,nilipenda aina ya wivu wanawake walionao walihisi mwenzao anafaidi sana kukunwa kumbe ni swala la kutimiza wajibu wako tu ktk huduma za kimwili.
     
  11. BPM

    BPM JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Oct 19, 2011
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    hili lipo kwa wanaume na wanawake wao hudhani wanajisifia au wanapata sifa kuonyesha kwamba wana watu sahihi au wana kilichobora .. lakini kiuhakika ni ulimbukeni fulani unawasumbua
     
  12. P

    Pawaga JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Oct 19, 2011
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    mi ntaacha leo tabia hyo
     
  13. Pdidy

    Pdidy JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Oct 19, 2011
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    Tatizo la wanwake wengi awana shukrani na ndio maana wanaume wameumbwa kuwasemea ..sasa linapokuja kwenye kusuluhishana nafikiri ni utashi wa mtu na akili yake ..ninao ushahdi mwanamke mmoja ofisini alikorofishana na mumewe wakakalishwa vikao na kila kikao kilichokuwa kikifanyika ofisi nzima tuliambiwa kinaendelea nini mpaka akakutana na wajinga wakamshauri angangane na talaka Leo yuko mwenyewe simcheki anajitibu na Hiv..so waakti mwingine ni kuomba Mungu akupe ufahamu naandikaga hata kwa watu wanaokuja kuomba ushauri wa ndoa haapa mtaambulia vichapo nyie wawili mkae mmyamalize..samahani naambiwa kuna wengine wana wanne anyway kaeni naao hao wanne kama umekorofishana nao wote...

    kuhusu

    Hili limejithibitisha sana kwa vijana ambao bado hawajaoa

    sina comment kwa wazinzi hata siku moja labda wakioa wakaachika waje jamvini tuwape msaada
     
  14. feis buku

    feis buku JF-Expert Member

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    tue!!! wataalamu wanakaita hako ka ugonjwa ''UZUZU'
     
  15. King'asti

    King'asti JF-Expert Member

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    Oct 19, 2011
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    wakati mwingine mtu anajisifia ili kujihakikishia mwenyewe (self reassurance), ni kama badala ya kujipa moyo kwa kujiangalia kwenye kioo na kujisemesha anaamua kusaka audience ya wanaume wenzie. when it comes to siri za kimapenzi,dont u agree wanaume huwa ni wambea kuliko wanawake? no offense meant,my observation
     
  16. Pdidy

    Pdidy JF-Expert Member

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    Kingast tutaken radhi kutuita wambea jamani!!loh
    kuwasifia imekuwa shuruba!!
     
  17. ndetichia

    ndetichia JF-Expert Member

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    Oct 19, 2011
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    na hili nalo neno..
     
  18. ndetichia

    ndetichia JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Oct 19, 2011
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    kuna kitu hapo sio nyie ndio balaa
     
  19. C

    CYPRIAN MKALI Senior Member

    #19
    Oct 19, 2011
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    Mimi nafikiri wewe unaongelea wavulana na si wanaume. Kwa wanaume nadhaani hili iltakuwa ni hulka ya mtu kama walivyo baadhi ya wanawake ambao wanapenda sifa za kijinga pia.
    Kwa wavulana, wanahitaji wenzao wawaone wakali na kupunguza ushindani kwani kipindi hicho bado wanakuwa wapo kwenye foolishage lakini baadae wakikua wanaacha. Binafsi sijawahi msikia rafiki yangu aliyetulia anaongelea siri za mpenzi wake hata kama stori zimenoga vipi labda wale wavijiweni ambapo kijiweni mtu uwa hakui.
     
  20. CPU

    CPU JF Gold Member

    #20
    Oct 19, 2011
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    Mzee wa Rula
    Mambo yako hivi kaka.
    Wanawake kisaikolojia approach zao ktk suala zima la kimahusiano na hata ktk kufanya mapenzi ni tofauti kabisa na wanaume. Hapa nazungumzia wanawake wenye asili ya afrika ambao ndio nimeishi nao muda mrefu zaidi na kuwafahamu. Mfano, mwanamke wa kiafrika ni ngumu sana kumtongoza mwanaume (hata ampende vipi) kwa namna ambayo mwanaume anavyotongoza. Wao wana namna yao ya kipekee jinsi ya kumtongoza mwanaume. (Refer thread ya Miss Judith kuhusu Utongozaji wa mwanamke)

    hali iko hivyohivyo pia ktk kufanya mapenzi. Kwa mwanamke wa kiafrika, NI AIBU KUBWA KUTAMKA HADHARANI KWAMBA CPU ALIMKUNA SANA SIKU WALIPOFANYA MAPENZI. Japo wapo wanawake wanaothubutu kusema hivi siku hizi (sijui kutokana na utandawazi au usawa) lakin bado still majority wanayo hii asili ya kutoweza kutamka hayo mambo hadharani, hata awe na shoga zake.
    Kwa wanaume, hali ni tofauti. Kwao kujisifia ni sehemu ya kuonyesha YEYE NI MWANAUME KAMILI, hasa anapokuwa na wanaume wenzake. Mwanaume anaweza kujisifu amemfanyia hivi na vile mwanamke na amemridhisha (hata kama si kweli mwanamke karidhika) ili kujiongezea heshima ya UANAUME. Simaanishi wanaume wote wanapumbazika na sifa za aina hii, bali wapo ambao kujisifia namna hii ni UANAUME KAMILI KWAO.

    Lakin kumbuka pia wanawake wanafanya mapenzi kwa hisia. So ili aridhike kimapenzi, atapenda kupata mwanaume ambaye atajua kusoma hisia zake na kuziridhisha. Japo mapenzi pande zote mbili hufurahia, lakin kwenye kuridhika kila upande huridhika kwa namna tofauti.
     
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