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Kuungama Noma!!!!!!

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by Bundewe, Apr 19, 2012.

  1. Bundewe

    Bundewe JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Apr 19, 2012
    Joined: Jun 14, 2011
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    Jamaa alienda kwa mchungaji kuungama...
    "Nihurumie Mungu wangu, nimetenda dhambi nyingi saana..."
    Mchungaji: "Mwanangu, usihofu... Mungu ni mwenye huruma saana...
    Atakusamehe tu..."
    Jamaa: "Mchungaji nimezini na wanawake wengi sana hapa kanisani...."
    Mchungaji: "Usihofu kabisa mwanangu, utasamehewa tu... Ila
    ili usamehewe vyema inabidi uwataje na useme umezini nao mara ngapi
    ili nao pia tuwaombee..."
    Jamaa: "Daaah, hapana mchungaji... Naona aibu saana, siwezi ongea..."
    Mchungaji: "Owky, sawa basi.. Baada tu ya ibada kuisha tutatoka lango kuu wote na ukimuona yoyote uliyewahi zini naye we sema 'ALELUYA'... Kama umezini naye mara moja, utasema 'ALELUYA' mara moja... Kama ni mara tatu hivyo hivyo..."
    Wakakubaliana na ibada ilipokwisha wote wakawa lango kuu la kutokea...
    Waumini walipoanza kutoka, akapita mke wajirani yake mmoja...
    Jamaa: "ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA,ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA....
    Mchungaji: "Mungu akusafishe na kukusamehe kabisa mara saba zote mlizozini..."
    Punde kidogo akatoka mke wa kiongozi wa kwaya taratiibu...
    Jamaa: "ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA!!!!"
    Mchungaji: "Mungu awasamehe saana mara tatu zote mlizozini..."
    Mke wa mzee wa kanisa akapita huku kashika biblia...
    Jamaa: "ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA,
    ALELUYA,ALELUYA.....
    Mchungaji: "Bwana akusamehe na kuwasafisha kabisa wote mara 5 zote ulizozini naye..."

    Mara akapita mke wa mchungaji...
    Jamaa: "ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA,ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA...

    Kabla jamaa hajamaliza Mchungaji akamzibua KOFI na kumwambia...
    "PUMBAVUUUUU... . Tena SHENZI kabisa!!! Na ulaaniwe kabisa SHETWANI mkubwa we!!! NaMUNGU asikusamehe
    milele na moto wa JEHANAMU ukufanye kuni kabisa mbwaaah weeeeh...
    Tena TOKAAAAA =$@€*%# zako ...... na nisikuone tena unakanyaga kanisani kwangu!


     
  2. PhD

    PhD JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Apr 19, 2012
    Joined: Jul 15, 2009
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    ndo akome huyo mchungaji, dhambi inaondolewa kwa toba ya kweli na sio mbwe mbwe
     
  3. dazu

    dazu JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Apr 19, 2012
    Joined: Feb 26, 2011
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    Du!!!! Nimecheka sana.
     
  4. m

    mjasiria JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Apr 19, 2012
    Joined: Jan 10, 2011
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    hahahahahahahah dah huyo jamaa ni kimeo balaa
     
  5. c

    chen Member

    #5
    Apr 19, 2012
    Joined: Feb 12, 2012
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    dah! cna mbavu
     
  6. driller

    driller JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Apr 19, 2012
    Joined: Aug 25, 2011
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    dah so jamaa alikutwa na swahibba kubwa eeeh..! dah so wife alikua ni kitanda cha mchizi yani.. kudadadadeki
     
  7. Baba V

    Baba V JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Apr 19, 2012
    Joined: Dec 29, 2010
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    Aleluya teh teh
     
  8. Prof Gamba

    Prof Gamba JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Apr 19, 2012
    Joined: Jun 10, 2011
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    Duh! Yaani nimecheka hadi machozi. Afadhali nipo peke yangu, wangeniona watu wangenishangaa sana. Jamaaa alikuwa balaa sana mpaka Mchungaji alichanganikiwa.
     
  9. SIMBA WA TARANGA

    SIMBA WA TARANGA JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Apr 19, 2012
    Joined: Feb 14, 2012
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    akapime ngoma, he must be ifected with hiv/aids
     
  10. N

    N series Senior Member

    #10
    Apr 20, 2012
    Joined: Jul 14, 2011
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    hahahha......teh tehe tehe tehe....... kwi kwi kwi kwi kwi...........
    u made my night, nimecheka sana kwa kweli
     
  11. MziziMkavu

    MziziMkavu JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Apr 20, 2012
    Joined: Feb 3, 2009
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    Mara akapita mke wa mchungaji...
    Jamaa: "ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA,ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA, ALELUYA...


    Kabla jamaa hajamaliza Mchungaji akamzibua KOFI na kumwambia...
    "PUMBAVUUUUU... . Tena SHENZI kabisa!!! Na ulaaniwe kabisa SHETWANI mkubwa we!!! NaMUNGU asikusamehe
    milele na moto wa JEHANAMU ukufanye kuni kabisa mbwaaah weeeeh...
    Tena TOKAAAAA =$@€*%# zako ...... na nisikuone tena unakanyaga kanisani kwangu!
     
  12. Perry

    Perry JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Apr 20, 2012
    Joined: Feb 24, 2011
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    asa ndo nin unaquote thread nzma afu unaandka upuuzi ka huu?
     
  13. Bundewe

    Bundewe JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Apr 20, 2012
    Joined: Jun 14, 2011
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    Pole sana!
     
  14. bampami

    bampami JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Apr 20, 2012
    Joined: Nov 5, 2011
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    Copy and paste..Teh teh teh
     
  15. OTIS

    OTIS JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Apr 20, 2012
    Joined: Sep 7, 2011
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    ALELUYA imenichefua sana
    Unashindwa nini kuandika HALELUYA?
    OTIs
     
  16. A

    Aura reader Member

    #16
    Apr 22, 2012
    Joined: Apr 1, 2012
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    Yaani mie mbavu sina kabisa! Nashukuru maana kucheka ni tiba kubwa ya Hisia na Akili!! Keep it up Bundewe!!!
     
  17. m

    mmc Senior Member

    #17
    Apr 24, 2012
    Joined: Apr 9, 2012
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    dah,umenchekesha
    sn.
     
  18. SHIEKA

    SHIEKA JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Apr 24, 2012
    Joined: Dec 20, 2011
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    OTIS! Hili tatizo la 'a' na 'h' lipo sana hapa JF sawa na 'l' na 'r'. Badala ya 'hataki' utaona 'ataki' 'hamna' inaandikwa 'amna' nk. Hii ni mojawapo ya kero za kuvumilia hapa JF!
     
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