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“KUTONGOZA” - Kukubaliwa AMA Kukataliwa…. What gives??

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by AshaDii, Oct 25, 2011.

  1. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #1
    Oct 25, 2011
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    Habari Wana JF....

    Kumekua na topics once in a while hapa MMU of guys complaining kua Kila mwanamke amtongozae anakataa…. Or kuna wengine ambao ni vice versa na husema kua wanawake wamekua rahisi saaana na kila anaemtongoza anakubali. I have got news for both guys from these two groups.

    Kabla sijaenda mbali tokana na ufikiri wangu ambao umeishia hapa…. Inabidi tukubali kua katika jamii tumetofautiana katika kila aspects na hali kimaisha… Iwe kielimu, ki uwezo, kitabaka ama ki level za kazi. Na mara nyingi katika jamii birds of the same feathers flock together… Ndo maana tuki observe utakuta kua watu wa kundi Fulani hutoka saana within that group thou it’s once in a while ambapo wahusika within a group huweza toka beyond their group. Mfano mdogo Sharobaro (awe wa kike ama kiume) versus a Born again Christian (awe wa kike ama wa kiume).

    Ikumbukwe pia kua kwa Mwanaume kutongoza vitu kama Mvuto, intelligence ama pesa ni ziada tu kwa zile sababu ambazo zaweza pelekea Mwanamke unaemtongoza kukukubali ama kukukataa…. After all mara nyingi kusomana huja baada ya kukubaliana. Hivo you as a guy saying hukubaliwi na wanawake sababu tu kua sina mvuto, pesa or maybe intelligence hizo ni excuse tu and Please put out your lights in the air!! For kuna guys hawana mbele wala nyuma na wanabadilisha wadada kila siku (kumbuka kua sio kwamba nashawishi utongozaji wa mara kwa mara – I just want the concerned aelewe ni kwa nini anajikuta katika hio hali ya kukubaliwa kila mara ama kukataliwa kila mara)

    A]. Wale ambao hupata wanawake wa kuwakataa daima.


    • The type ya wanawake ambao wanakuvutia ni way beyond your league… Na kwamba as much as wapenda jionesha kua you are in the same group na wao – everybody around you knows you are not except you. Sorry budy… Shtuka.
    • Yawezekana kua ni wazi kwa woote kua masikio yamekusimama na hujatulia kabisa BUT ironically as it is to most men wanawake wanaokuvutia ni wale wapole, walotulia na wastaarabu. Hilo hupelekea kila utongozapo your reputation na attitude precedes over you… Hivo kaka tulia na walau badilika.
    • Yawezekana kua personality yako (from a glance) ndo zile ambazo zimekakaa kihatari hatari… yaani mtu akikuona for the first time umekaa ka’ jambazi vile. Worse enough alama kibaousoni utafikiri ulipigwa kipigo cha mwizi (kumbe ukute walah!); Pia yaweza kua sababu ya wewe kukataliwa. For as much as kuna wanawake wengi wavutiwa na bad boys – yako inakua imekubuhu!
    • Na most importantly ni kua huna art ya talking… (hapa wanaume wengine huenda beyond na kutoa uongo kibao ili tu mwanamke aingie line-NOTE that sisemi kua useme uongo… NO!) hapo ina maana huna art of seducing.. kwamba ni maneno gani mwanamke wa aina Fulani anapenda asikie, kwamba ni namna gani utaonesha you will take care of her bila kusema the exact words… kwamba ni namna gani unaonesha umevutiwa na yeye bila kutamka the exact words… Na unapoongea nae – how much does your body language support your words?? Yoote hio ni muhimu, na to me hio ni moja ya factor ya kwanza kabisa kuweza shawishi a lady kukukubali kabla hata hajajua uwezo wako upo vipi.
    • Alafu nyingine simply tu yawezekana kua ni moja ya wale ambao hawapendeki… thou siamini kua utakosa hata mmoja wa kukupenda.

    B]. Wale ambao hupata wanawake wa kuwakubali Daima.


    • Yawezekana kua wewe Mwanaume ni Player… Na a true player knows all the tricks and rules in the book. Yaani as in kila aina ya mwanamke awe mke wa mtu, awe single, awe gate kali, awe born again, awe mswalihina, awe bado hajaanza hayo mambo, awe mtoto wa pastor/Obama/Gaddafi…. In short yeyote Yule ambae yupo katika definition ya under female; wewe mwanaume unajua kua huyo mwanamke ni nini anataka, hivo unajua ni nini anataka asikie, which means unajua ni nini uwakilishe which at the end of the day unajua ni vipi umpate.


    • Unatambua kabisa traits na tabia za wanawake; na hulka yako wewe mwanaume ni kua ukimtongoza mwanamke ni lazima akubali. Hivo you are the type of dude ambae hutongoza pale tu ambapo ni rahisi kupata; hii sometimes hukufanya kua kuna wanawake hua unatamani saaana wawe wapenzi wako but ukijua the odds za kumpata iko tu chini ya 6 or 7; wala hata uhangaiki for chances za yeye kukataa ni kubwa kuliko kukubali.


    • Yawezekana una tabia hizi zoote na zimeambatana; For hizi tabia in one person is too much for most of us ladies…. Unamvuto (mtanashati na una uzuri wa kiume – sio wa kike), Uko care free huna majidai, Una mpunga wa kutosha, Uko single, Uko intelligent when talking (well exposed), Uko very care free and dynamic popote pale (ukiw 5 star hotel you are home… Ukiwa kijijini you are home… Ukiwa kazini you are home… Ukiwa among men you are home… Ukiwa among women you are home.. Ukiwa among elders you are home) Yaani haijalisha uko wapi; Daima you are a great person to be with kwa mtazamo wa walo kuzunguka toka Wale level ya juu kabisa hadi level ya Yule anae kusafishia viatu. Once in a while Mungu muhimu hivo kuna ibada hata kama ni hapa na pale.
    Mwanaume mwenye the above tabiaz can get any type of woman he wants… Hivo kama kweli ana nia ya kumpata Mwanamke of his choice… Katika odds za 10 ana odds za 9.8 za kukubaliwa…. For the simple reason kua whatever the lady is exposed to; Yeye the guy yupo flexible thus giving the lady what she wants kwake ni rahisi na in addition to that ni kua ni the type of guy ambae a lady is comfortable kua around kitu ambacho ni cha mhimu (for most ladies tupo so very self conscious around their men)


    Hivo basi ushauri kwa kaka zangu… Kama wanawake unaowatongoza wanakataa woote ama kukubali woote kabla hujatulaumu us ladies na kutuweka katika kundi moja woote Naomba kwanza jitazame wewe bila upendeleo na free of emotions the type of person you are, the type of ladies wanaokuvutia ili walau upate tatizo na ujue wapi pa kuanzia.

    Hata hivo kwa JF members nikiwa nimetoa a woman’s perspective, naamini saana kua kaka/baba zaungu mtanielewesha vizuri wapi nimekosea, ama kuongezea pale ambapo nimetaja with GREAT hope kua mtaongeza na zingine, walau sie species (wanawake VS wanaume) tuweze somana na kuelewa what the opposite sex thinks about in relation na topic. Na nategemea akina dada/mama tutapeana mawazo ni kwanini tunakataa ama kukubali tutongozwapo..... Na nategemea with GREAT hope pia kua fellow ladies watanipa support katika the whole discussion. Asanteni.


    Pamoja Saana

    AshaDii.

     
  2. v

    valid statement JF-Expert Member

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    Oct 25, 2011
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    Mtaa kwangu ninakoishi. Kila mabinti 7 ktk 10 ukimtongoza ANAKUBALI
    Huitaji kuwa na sifa ulizitaja hapo juu.
    Wao wanataka mradi tu uwe unaendesha gari.
    Gari la aina yeyote ile, ili mradi liwe gari, hata kama limeandikwa AMBULANCE , kama unakujaga nalo ku cruise mtaani, mbona utawapanga sana.
     
  3. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #3
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    Khaa!! Yaani umenimaliza nguvu kwa kicheko....lol.... Hata gari la Ambulance twende kazini..... Aisee that says a lot kuhusu mtaa wenu na kwa ufupi ina maana ni uswahilini.... In other words kama huna gari waweza kuta woote wanakataa??
     
  4. Roulette

    Roulette JF-Expert Member

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    Oct 25, 2011
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    Nimemaliza kusoma ila akili bado imekwama hapo... Mbona utawafanya kaka zetu kufikiria kua mtu kama huyo anaweza kuwepom(au anaweza kua ndio yeye?) but thakns for the thread... very useful indeed.
     
  5. v

    valid statement JF-Expert Member

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    kama huna gari, hata uwe sharabaro, uwe handsome, uwe unajua kutongoza, HAWAKUBALI. Lakini uwe na gari tu, utazani wamelogewa na madereva. Ukiwa dereva teksi. Ndo balaa.
    Leo nina ED.
     
  6. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

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    Roulette... wapo bana, thou one in a million.... Alafu out of curiosity what makes you think kua one think yupo hivo hali siio kweli?? lol
     
  7. Roulette

    Roulette JF-Expert Member

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    Ngoja kwanza waje na waseme kua they think they are the perfect guy (na ni wengi utawasoma). Wakisha ondoka, kwenye saa 2, sa tatu usiku, nitakwambia what makes me think they are not. kaa hapa hapa tu, watakuja.
     
  8. Mamndenyi

    Mamndenyi JF-Expert Member

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    Mi vyakutongoza wanaume nimeanza kuviona miaka hii,
    enzi zetu tulijali upendo kuliko pesa na vitu vingine,
    watongozaji /watongozwaji hebu tuelezeni ya kileo ikoje, mi ndo sijui kabisa.
     
  9. Bishanga

    Bishanga JF-Expert Member

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    Oct 25, 2011
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    Asha una mambo!
    Nshawahi fukuzia mdada mmoja,nikafukuzia weeeeeeeeee,mara anipe matumaini,mara anigandishe bila sababu,mwisho ikawa obsession,nikajenga ile attitude kuwa iwe isiwe atanasa tu,kumbe lol,chenga zote kumbe anaishi kinyumba na mwanamke mwenzie.She just kept up being seen with me ili jamii imwone 'she is normal'.Na kibaya zaidi outing nyingi alikuwa anakuja na 'girlfriend' wake.Bongo ina mambo jamani.
    ngoja nikaoge kwanza kisha nitafute PC,nina mengi ya kusema hapa,haka ka nokia tochi hakafai kwa kibarua kizito cha ku comment kwenye uzi huu.
     
  10. Mwanakili90

    Mwanakili90 JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Oct 25, 2011
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    kwanza nitoe shukrani mingi sana kwa rafiki wangu kipenzi AshADII kwa useful post.

    Pili, mada ni nzuri inamashiko yake kwa namna yake ya kipekee.

    Mimi huwa naamini jambo moja,ili mwanaume au mwanamke aweze kupata mwenzake{thru kutongozana} ni lazima tabia zao ziwe zinashabiiana kwa 75%.

    25% ni mapungufu ambayo wanaweza kuyafanyia kazi na kuyarekebisha na penzi likasonga mbele.

    Pia historia kati ya watongonazao ni one of the factor inayoweza kuathiri majibu kwa mtongozaji/mtongozwaji.
     
  11. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #11
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    hahahaha..... hapa Roulette you are being naughty.... Hata hivo mimi very patient.....lol
     
  12. The Finest

    The Finest JF-Expert Member

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    Hahaha....lol....Valid mtaa gani huo unaoishi wewe dah nimecheka kweli asubuhi asubuhi
     
  13. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #13
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    Baba na Babu zetu walikua na raha saaaana wakati wa kutongoza... Vigezo na masharti yalikua ya maana na msingi....
     
  14. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #14
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    B' nimecheka mpaka baasi.... The imagination yenyewe imenifurahisha... Are you saying ulipogundua otherwise uliahirisha?? Kwani kungekua na ubaya gani??
     
  15. SMU

    SMU JF-Expert Member

    #15
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    Hivi 'siku hizi' bado kuna "kutongoza" (kwa maana yake hasa)? Kuna jamaa yangu (yeye ni 'senior bachelor') alikuwa ananiambia juzi kwamba hakumbuki mara ya mwisho ametongoza lini (tulikuwa tunaongelea mada inafanana sana na hii)!

    Hata ukiongea na baadhi ya wadada...mara nyingi hawasemi 'ametongozwa' wanatumia zaidi 'kutakwa' (utasikia fulani 'ananitaka')...well inawezekana ni mabadiliko ya lugha tu lakini kitendo ni kile kile!
     
  16. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

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    Mwanakili asante dear for the acknowledgement.... nimependa mtazamo wako wa kushabihiana kitabia.... Ila kuna ile ya vijana hawa ambao ni viruka njia kutongoza binti alotulia... Hapo wewe unasemaje??
     
  17. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

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    Hii nayo kali... ina maana anatumia teknik gani?? Kwamba wanaenda kibubu-bubu?? Naomba nieleweshe SMU....
     
  18. Safety last

    Safety last JF-Expert Member

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    Ashadii,ATRACTION HAS NO CHOICE,WHAT WOMEN WANT IS NOT WHAT THEY WANT,THEY WANT YOU (MEN) TO GIVE THEM WHAT THEY WANT WITHOUT TELLING YOU WANT THEY WANT.
     
  19. Smile

    Smile JF-Expert Member

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    wape somo sis asha dii mtu anakuja kukutongoza ana sura kama amelipuliwa na baruti bwana khaaaaaaaaaaaaa
     
  20. Mwanakili90

    Mwanakili90 JF-Expert Member

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    Kutulia kuna mtazamo mpana kidogo.labda ungeweka wazi huyo binti alivotulia ili niweze jua mwanaume ana mharibia vipi kesho yake?

    Ukwel binti alitulia ni lazima awe bikra.

    Juzi nilikua na my uncle akawa anataka akapate penzi from her new grl.
    Bt yule dada akamwambia mpaka aende kwa wazaz na amuoe ndo atampa akitakacho.
    Anko akamuuliza wewe ni bikra? Grl akasema hapana.
    Then akamwambia wazazi wanaumuhmu gani?
    So kutulia kupi dada ASHADII?
     
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