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Kumuuliza mtu afya yake sio ustaarabu?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by The Boss, Dec 12, 2011.

  1. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Dec 12, 2011
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    Unakutana na mtu unamfahamu
    lakini hujamuona siku nyiingi...
    but unashtuka unamuona amekonda saana
    amebadilika kiafya.....je kumuuliza ni sawa?????
    naona watu wengi siku hizi hawapendi kuulizwa
    mbona umekonda saana....
    mimi huwa najifanya sija notice ....nakosea??????
    kipi ni sahihi ?kuuliza au kutouliza?????
     
  2. Kiranga

    Kiranga JF-Expert Member

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    Unaweza kuuliza kinamna isiyokuwa direct. Kumwambia mtu "mbona umekonda" si ustaarabu kwa sababu unaweza kumfanya ama adanganye au akwambie ukweli wa kushtua.

    Suppose mtu amekonda kutokana na H.I.V na hataki watu wajue, ukimuuliza hivyo akujibu vipi?

    Mara nyingine ni muhimu kuheshimu privacy na kumwacha mtu akwambie mwenyewe kama anataka.Unaweza kuuliza "mzima kabisa?" Lakini "Mbona umekonda?" ni swala linaloingilia undani kabisa wa mtu na si ustaarabu.

    Kuna Profesa wangu mmoja wa Uchumi alikuwa anasema yeye hawezi hata kumuuliza mtu "unafanya kazi wapi?" Kwa sababu huwjui kama kila mtu ana kazi, na unaweza kum-embarrass mtu asiyetaka watu wajue kama hana kazi.

    Bottom line, ukimpa mtu nafasi ya kusema anayotaka na kuacha asiyotaka mtu atakwambia anayotaka na kuacha asiyotaka.
     
  3. Viol

    Viol JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Dec 12, 2011
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    Inategemeana na jinsi anavyochukulia,kama amekonda kwa magonjwa basi anaweza akajisikia vibaya.
    but sometimes unakuta ni macho yako tu na hajakonda na hana tatizo basi atachukulia poa,
    cha msingi angalia na jinsi afya ya huyo mtu ilivyo.
     
  4. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

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    Kama mkeo/mumeo muulize vinginevyo unataka manundu ya hiari.
     
  5. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

    #5
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    Utakondaje kwa macho ya mtu mwingine?

    unless mtu awe kwenye mission ya kupunguza uzito ndo ukimwambia amekonda ana-appreciate, otherwise ni uhasama tu

    Yaani mfano mtu aje aniambie mie nimekonda, kweli namtandika navyopenda kunenepa ivo ili nitoe supu nyingi, sitaki kuwa ka starter afu uniambie nimekonda?!!!
     
  6. L

    LAT JF-Expert Member

    #6
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    upo sahihi mkuu, muhusika inabidi awe wazi kwanza, yawezekana amekonda kwa raha zake
     
  7. King'asti

    King'asti JF-Expert Member

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    Ni muhimu kuheshimu privacy ya mtu. Actually ni tabia mbaya mtu akikuambia anaumwa ukamuuliza anaumwa nini as if unataka kumpatia matibabu. Ni ustaarabu kuuliza 'umepata matibabu?' kwa ajili ya kufungua maongezi. Asipoona haja ya details, u shld respect and not pry. Na sio issue tu ya afya, its rude kuuliza mtu bei ya kila alichonacho (watch, shoes, ring, car aaaghhrr!), kama kaoa, ana watoto wangapi and personal questions. Ukiuliza tu 'how have u been doing?!' Kama anataka atakueleza.
     
  8. Kiranga

    Kiranga JF-Expert Member

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    Hahaha, umezibuka.

    Nchi nyingine, hasa zenye tatizo la obesity, mtu kukwambia "umekonda" inaweza kuwa compliment. Unaonekana unafanya mazoezi, una keep fit etc.

    All in all mtu mwenyewe ajisemee, sio miswali kama kituo cha polisi.
     
  9. King'asti

    King'asti JF-Expert Member

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    Kongosho, mtu akifanya mpangilio 'anapungua' na sio kukonda. Actually loosing 10% of ur body weight inachukuliwa una tatizo la kiafya kama TB, HIV/AIDS ama diabetes
     
  10. Viol

    Viol JF-Expert Member

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    lol basi we umepungua,sasa hivi unabebeka
     
  11. m

    mzabzab JF-Expert Member

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    mkandamize swali tuu...aibu ya nini
     
  12. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

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    We mwambie tu umepungua /ongezeka siku hizi/ndugu/mtu wangu.Kwasababu hiyo yaweza kuchukuliwa kama compliment, alafu kama ni mgonjwa au ana matatizo memgine na yuko comfortable kukueleza atakujibu "ahhh acha tu ndugu yangu, malaria hii/matatizo/mawazo haya". Hapo hatojisikia vibaya.

    PS
    Kama hujali afya/matatizo yake usiulize, hamna haja ya kiwa nosy wakati mtu hata akikwambia mama mwenye nyumba wake kapiga mlango wake kofuli utaishia kufurahia moyoni badala ya kumsaidia hata kwa mawazo, GENUINELY.
     
  13. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

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    We ni Basata bakita
    anyway najua umenipata swala la kusifia kupungua hadi mtu awe alikuwa anataka kufanya ivo
    utumie kapungua, kakonda
     
  14. Kongosho

    Kongosho JF-Expert Member

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    Najua umentukana na hiyo zibuka
    will deal with u later

     
  15. BADILI TABIA

    BADILI TABIA JF-Expert Member

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    wabongo ..... Ukikonda atakuuliza mbona umekonda
    ukinenepa atakuuliza mbaona umenenepa...
    Ukikohoa atakuuliza vipi mbona kikohozi...

    Sasa ole wako mkutane ukiwa umekonda na unakohoa.......

    All in all hzipendezi, binafsi huwa siulizi hilo swali
     
  16. Kiranga

    Kiranga JF-Expert Member

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    Actually kuzibuka kwangu ni compliment.

    Zibuka = husikii, una namna ya kufikiri yako mwenyewe bila kujali noise za nje.Capable of transcending the common dialogue and even starting a paradigm shift/ attaining the required escape velocity.

    Highly recommended.

    Bila kuzibuka hamna maendeleo.
     
  17. King'asti

    King'asti JF-Expert Member

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    Mie bakwata. Kukonda sio neno zuri sana banaa, eboo!
     
  18. Matola

    Matola JF-Expert Member

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    Inshort maswali ya kijinga jinga huwa hayafai kama una issue ni umuulize mtu lete mpya maana hamjaonana siku nyingi labda anaweza kukupa jipya.
    kuna jamaa yangu alikuwa anaumia sana nikifuatana nae akikutana collegues wake na maswali yao ya kizandiki eti vipi shemeji mbona haonekani siku hizi? sasa sijui walikuwa wanaonana wapi wakati mshikaji na demu wake wameshamwagana na hapendi hata kusikia jina la yule binti.
     
  19. BAK

    BAK JF-Expert Member

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    Inategemea BOSS ni jinsi mlivyozoeana na pia na mtu wenyewe alivyo....Wengine anaweza kukujibu mpaka ukajuta kwanini uliuliza swali hilo.
     
  20. Freema Agyeman

    Freema Agyeman JF-Expert Member

    #20
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    in addition, je kumuuliza ntu hali yake ya afya pale inapokuwa 'imedorora sana' ni utu au kukosa utu?
     
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