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KITCHEN PARTY BUBU….. Nafasi ya MKE ndani ya NDOA (Kwa wanawake tu!!!) With Love to You Cheusie…

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by AshaDii, Nov 18, 2011.

  1. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #1
    Nov 18, 2011
    Joined: Apr 16, 2011
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    Habari JF Ladies and gents (ambao najua lazima mchungulie...)


    Huu Uzi ni “in courtesy of Cheusi Mangala (fellow JF Member ambae kapata Mchumba na anatarajia kuolewa soon” na pia ni speacial kwa akina dada/mama ambao ni wanandoa AMA wanaotarajia kuolewa AMA wanatazamia kuolewa in the Future…

    Ni wazi kua Taasisi ya NDOA imebadilika saana, hasa nafasi ya Mwanamke katika nafasi ya Mke. Mimi AshaDii nipo “Old fashioned kidogo katika sector hio” hivo basi huu Uzi natoa kwa vigezo ambavo Bibi na Mama zetu walikulia/lelewa/Kufundwa ikiwa imechakachuliwa sehemu chache saana; which is inevitable katika ulimwengu wa leo unaobadilika kila kukicha na in every aspect. Cheusie/watarajiwa et al… Zingatia kua niloorodhesha hapa chini IMO ni muhimu saana kuzingatia kama Mke thou kweli kabisa it is not a Universal belief… Hivo kila mmoja yupo huru kuchukua AMA kuachia….


    MAENEO MUHIMU KATIKA NDOA….


    "MUME"

    IMO mtihani woote uko hapa… Kuishi na hawa baba/kaka zetu yahitaji nguvu ya ziada… Hio nguvu hua at Minimal kama kweli wampenda – ikiwa otherwise believe me you ni mtihani…. Mie naamini kua kama Mke; Mumeo lazima humjali kwa yale yalo ya msingi kama hasa yale home based personal needs… Ukijumuisha emotional, psychological na Sex pia. Niseme tu muhimu kuliko yooote kwa mumeo kuliko hata kupenda ni kumsoma na kumuelewa; Hio itakusaidia kujua akichukia, akichoka, akiongopa, akikwazika, akiwa na dalili ya kusema he is about to get sick, akifurahi na akiridhika katika kila aspect iwe chakula, Sex, tendo ulofanya or whatever…. Na ukifaulu hapo furaha ndani ya nyumba ina high probability…

    "NYUMBANI"

    No matter mna hali gani ama mpo level gani ya Maisha, nyumbani kwako ni sehem muhimu saana kupaweka mazingira ambayo yanaita. Hapo nina maana ya Usafi na mpangilio wako (yaani kua organized)… Usafi na good organization ya vitu husaidia saana kuficha hata kama mnahali mbaya hasa kifedha… Make nyumbani the most comfortable place to be kwako mwenyewe na hata mumeo na familia yako. Yaani akiwa kachoka, kakwazika, kafurahi iwe ni a condusive place to be….

    "BUDJET"

    Ni moja ya sehemu ya muhimu saana katika ndoa…. Mara nyingi basis ya ugomvi mwingi ndani ya ndoa moja ya chanzo ni kutokuwepo kwa pesa ya kutosha Ama the Misuse of it…. Mwanamke mwerevu IMO ni lazima awe mjanja na awe bega kwa bega a mumewe hasa on the use of Money na mipango ya maendeleo ya hapo badae…. Wanawake wengi saana twaponzwa saana na tamaa (hasa vitu vya mwilini) – na hata ile tabia ya kununua kitu hata uhitaji sababu tu eti umekuta kipo cheap… Hio upelekea kujaa ndani kwa vitu ambavo hata havina umuhimu wowote…. Jitahidi kua na vitu ambavo kweli vyahitajika…. Take note: Sisemi uwe bahiri...

    "NDUGU NA JAMAA"

    Ule msemo wa kusema kua ni wewe na Mumeo tu wengine hawana umuhimu as much as mwapendana….. Haupo safe in the Long run.. Kuishi vizuri na ndugu na jamaa (hivo uvumilivu wa madhaifu yao hata yakivuka mpaka ni muhimu) Mtu ambae huishi nae anakuboa kila mara, ni rahisi kumvumilia. Na hata hivo zingatia kua sio ndugu woote wa Mwenza wako wana hila, saa ingine Mke ndo huanzisha na kusababisha hizo hila… Wakija wageni wake unavimba… Unataka wa upande wako tu, Usithubutu dear…. Kuna ile pia ya ngugu wa mumeo (i.e dadake, Mamake) kutaka shindana saana kuchukua attention ya mumeo, to hell with it – utapoingia tu katika hio competition anae umia zaidi ni mumeo na wala sio hao mnaokomeshana…. Zingatia pia kama mama wa Mumeo yupo bado; usijiandae vita but radher conquer her with Love… kama wewe waelewana na Mamamkwe kwisha kazi wanandugu wengine watakua wanampigia mbuzi guiter… Kumuelewa mkweo nimeeleza kwa kirefu katika This thread (Understand your Mamamkwe – it is worth it)

    "UPENDO/MAPENZI NDANI YA NDOA"

    Mapenzi ndani ya ndoa hayapo consistent kila siku, hua yanabadilika na sometimes hadi almost hata mchukiane (God Forbid) but you have to be ready – maana walo ndani ya ndoa wanaelewa fika kuna stages Mapenzi yaweza kufa kabisa (Rut stage) BUT baadae yakarudi ajabu… Mpaka nyie wenyewe wahusika mkashanga…. Hivo sio umefika hio stage, tayari upo tayari kuachia ngazi, Kua mstahimilivu, kua mvumilivu, kua mwerevu na jitahidi saana kua mke mwenye busara na asokurupuka…. Na hio yawezekana tu kwa kumhusisha Mungu katika ndoa yako…. HOWEVER Zingatia, mumeo anakupenda, anakujali, anajali familia na yupo responsible kwa kila kitu (as in a good hubby & Father) I tell you Mng’ang’anie; labda kama una hakika there is no hope na hawezi kupenda pia…
    My Motto “My Man remains to be my MAN!!!!” Kama ni mume wangu, tena wa Ndoa…. siwezi mwachia eti tu sababu my fellow woman kanizidi kete! Nitamuachia for only for concrete reasons…. Hanithamini na wala hanipendi (for hivi vitu hufanya a man asiwe resiponsible wala asijali welfare yako) Hapo let him GO – For he is not worth it….

    "UGOMVI NDANI YA NYUMBA"

    Usije jisahau ukajiona you are so special na kwamba wee tu ndo mwangombana na mumeo (incase ikatokea); Usipende saana kuhusisha mambo ya ugomvi wako na watu wengine – unless otherwise issue ni kubwa saana. BUT hata hivo inabidi unakua makini ni nani umhusishe… Yahitaji sana mtu mwenye busara, hekima na nia njema juu yako kuweza kusaidia kweli matatizo yaliyopo ndani ya ndoa yako. Na ule mtindo wa kusimulia saa ingine wajichora na kumfanya mtu ambae unamsimulia afurahi katika roho yako – na pia wewe mwenyewe unakua unajenga upenyo wa kuletewa mambo ambayo yaweza athiri ndoa yako.

    "MARAFIKI/MASHOGA"

    Cheusie beware of Marafiki dear hasa mashoga (tena shoga zako ambao hawajaolewa ndo sumu kabisa for believe me you – your interests zimeshatofautiana; In rare cases wapo ambao hawajaolewa but wana heshima zao, Tread carefully with this group (shoga)…. Cross the line wapi wapite, Shoga anakua shogaa mpaka mwazoeana aje nyumbani hadi chumbani kwako na mumeo…. Aingie apike jikoni hicho chakula aandaliwe na mumeo (na hali huna lolote la kukuzuia wewe mwenyewe kufanya)….. Shoga ajue siri zako zoote za wewe na mumeo hadi zile intimate as in what makes him tick…. Shoga wa kuja kila week nyumbani kwako…. Shoga wa kumuachia wana hug, tia story (bila uwepo wako) na mumeo, peana lift za ovyo ovyo (in the name ya usasa or whatever) HAKUFAI Period!! Hawa in most cases ndo hugeuka the next wife to your hubby, na ndo wasaliti wakubwa ambao hata akimkamata mumeo aweza shindwa furukuta for tayari ajua the inns na outs zoote za huyo mwanaume…..

    "SEX"

    Dear yalo ya msingi katika 6/6 nakutembelea PM hasa ni jinsi gani ujiweke sawa na katika hali nzuri sehemu husika - daima, Siwezi anika hapa… Sielewi upo vipi… But kwa mwanamke yeyote yule if you LOVE sex…. Then hii sector is so simple for you. Ni lazima uwe mtundu (take note sio mtukutu mpaka utake kutoa back door), ni lazima upende the act na ni lazima u-play part yako… Msome nini anapenda, na ni namna gani anareact ukifanya kitu gani…. Msome akichoka ama ana energy ya kutosha ni namna gani ipo more comfortable na relaxing kwake; Learn about Sex and the art of it…. Epuka porn movies, zile ni kwa ajili ya biashara na upuuzi mwingi wa mle ni for sale… You want porn inayo faa wanandoa tafuta Kamasutra (Drawn from the Indians)… Kama kuna kitu chakusumbua hapa, you just PM me and I will try my best na kama nimekwama kuna al-maarufu Faiza Foxy……

    "CHAKULA"

    Hapa dear ni mtihani mmoja wapo… Bahati nzuri nina makala ndefu kuhusu hii Sector na kama sikosei hukuwepo…. Nime copy na kupaste hiki kipande but ukiwa na mda pitia Link….

    Ni wazi kua kaka/baba zetu wanapenda Sex, Great Food, Good Drinks mengine ndo hufuata… Wadada/wamama We love Good Life, Attention, Hivyo basi with Great Food you can say volume of words… Show the extent of your affection and Say the words I Love you… and this Dears is with food – Not only food, But Great Food… Chakula waweza onesha intensity ya mapenzi yako saa ingine kuliko maneno… It has that power..

    Chakula pia kinaweza haribu mahusiano hasa kati ya wenza/wapenzi… Hii hutokea saana pale mdada/mmama mapishi nyumbani kwake yamemshinda kabisaa… In short hajui kupika… wakaka/baba wengine hawana makuu na huvumilia na kuona sawa tu… (ni wachache by the way…) BUT Issue ni kwa wale ambao kalelewa katika familia ambayo they are Great Cooks… yaani kazoea chakula kizuri na kitamu pia… yaani hata kama kala tu Ugali na dagaa… huo ugali ni ugali umesongwa hasa!… na hizo dagaa mazagazaga yoote from kitunguu saumu, nazi, nyanya/hoho/carrot/vitunguu, curry powder to perfection. (Huyu akipata nyumba ndogo anajua wajibu wake katika sector ya chakula usishangae ukitangaziwa mke mdogo….)salads. Of course bila kusahau Matunda na Home made fresh Juice – for vitu kama soda, wine, beer not recommended kuenda sambamba na food…

    "YOU"

    Cheusie dearest… Jitambue, Jipende na be happy… Na you can not be happy hata kama una kila kitu plus huyo mume if you do not appreciate yourself, if you do not know what you want, if you do not know kuandaa Mazingira ya furaha ndani ya nyumba yako na wale walo kuzunguka, na if pia you are not appreciative of the little you have. Nenda mpenzi, mpe haki Mumeo na Mpende pia but isivuke mpaka ukaona ndo Mungu wako… Narudia Muelewe his ins and outs… Narudia pia mhudumie responsively, akivuka mpaka draw your claws out na show kua you are capable as long as ni once in a while… Ukiwa na tabia ya kununa, kuchukia, kulalama hata kwa vitu vidogo – atazoea hio hali kiasi kwamba atakua anaku ignore mpaka yaweza kudrive to madness… Yalo mengi katika ndoa sio mapya… yatakiwa tu uwe makini… Na kumbuka the way you want to be treated by your hubby starts now. You want to be kissed kila akiingia (demand hilo sasa); Unataka once in a while awepo nawe jikoni (demand hilo sasa)… Ili mradi usiwe too demanding katika matakwa yako mpaka ikawa kero kwa mwenzio…. BEST OF LUCK!!

    Cheusimaangala Dearest, napenda saana watu waliopo katika ndoa… I hate divorces… Nakuombea kwa Maanani (kama ambavo inabidi ujiombee) alinde hio NDOA iwe ya amani na upendo wa dhati…. Nakutakia kila la kheri, na naomba unisamehe kwa kuchelewesha saana kupost as promised, but hopefully hamna liliko haribika….

    JF Ladies...

    Nawaomba wapenzi tujumuike pamoja, yawezekana kuna sehemu nimeharibu (hivo ina maana hua naharibu) tuweze rekebishana…. Naomba pia Michango yenu ya ziada, na ujumbe zaidi kwa Mwenzetu Cheusie ambae anajiandaa na ndoa… Hopefully mtani accompany katika hili…. Natanguliza shukrani.


    "With LOVE to you Cheusie and all the Ladies to be married soon...."

    Pamoja Saana

    AshaDii.

     
  2. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #2
    Nov 18, 2011
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    You must have plenty of time on your hands..
     
  3. Zinduna

    Zinduna JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Nov 18, 2011
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    Ahsante Da, AshaDii, lakini kwani hawa viumbe wa kiume hawahitaji hili darsa, maana naona sie wanawake tu ndio twaelimishwa saana jinsi ya kuwa-handle. Ina maana wao hawana wajibu wa kuwa na hii ilmu ya mambo ya ndoa? au ndiyo yale ya kuambiwa mwanamke mjinga huivunja ndoa yake kwa mikono yake mwenyewe, mwanaume hapo hajahusishwa, maana yeye hawezi kuwa mjinga!? Duh! hawa viumbe wamependelewa kweli!
     
  4. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #4
    Nov 18, 2011
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    hahahaha.... Njoo uishi na mimi a week then you will know it is the exact truth, in fact sijalala more than 4 hours for over a week... Ule ushauri ulinupa asbh wa Insomnia naufanyia kazi for ova a year sasa...
     
  5. Smile

    Smile JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Nov 18, 2011
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    mimi namkumbusha tu kuwa na heshima na adabu kwa mumemuheshimu kwa moyo wako wote epuka madharau na kuwa na mdomo mrefu hata kama amekuudhipia epuka kujibizana nae mbele za watu hata kama yeye ndo mwenye makosakuwa mpole nyenyekea sio too much lakinikumbuka neno la bwana linasema enyi wanawake watiini waume zenumpe na maguud care ya ukweli nitarudi badae kumalizia
     
  6. arnolds

    arnolds Senior Member

    #6
    Nov 18, 2011
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    Napita tu, BUT well said Ashadii!..
     
  7. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #7
    Nov 18, 2011
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    Zinduna wanawajibu pia wa kupata darasa, yawezekana haitangazwi but believe me you hua wanafundishana haya mambo na kuelekezana haya mambo. Na ni muhimu pia for them kujua role yake as a Husband, na ndo maana waweza kuta Mwanaume anapata a good wife but hamu-appreiciate sababu tu anaona ka vile ni haki yake akisahau si wanawake woote hufanya hivo....

    Wanaposema kua Mwanamek mjinga huvunja ndoa yake mwenyewe.. Hapo maana yake ni kubwa saana. In the sense kwamba for any marriage to succeed ni lazima Manamke ndo agangamale from the simple truth kua "mwanaume akiamua afanye visa mkewe ili ondoke na ndo ivunjike - kama mwanamke hajaamua; Haitowezekana.... Where as Mwanamke akiamua afanye visa na ndoa yake ivunjike, hio ni in a day yawezekana!"
     
  8. A

    Ave Ave Maria JF-Expert Member

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    Mausia hayoooo........! Msifanye mzaha jamani.
     
  9. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #9
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    ....lol... Usipite tena.... Thanks for the acknowledgement.
     
  10. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

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    Kipipi acha Mzaha.... Say something.... Hebu nisaidie bana!
     
  11. Kaizer

    Kaizer JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Nov 18, 2011
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    Baby.....hapa hakuna substitution mpenzi....huyu FLY anaweza kutafuta sehemu nyengine tu ili aujue ukweli kama una muda au la.....besides...me ndo najua the exact truth so worry not.....lol

    leo walau tutakuwa na break from Bishanga's outburst.....
     
  12. Zinduna

    Zinduna JF-Expert Member

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    Ahsante Da, AshaDii kwa ufafanuzi wako mahiri, Sasa nakubaliana na maneno ya Nyanya yangu Almarhum Kijakazi, pale aliponiambia kuwa, ukitaka ndoa yako idumu wakati mwingine yapasa ujifanye mjinga. Kwa kujifanya mjinga mume atapata fursa ya kujifunza kupitia kwako na itakuwa rahisi kwake kugundua kwamba yeye ndiye mjinga! Ni kauli ambayo imenikaa kichwani hadi leo. Nakubaliana na weye kwamba sisi ndiyo tulio na uwezo wa kuamua kwamba ndoa zetu ziendelee au zisiendelee.
     
  13. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

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    Darling Kaizer.... what can i possibly say hapa?? Love naahidi to be at my best leo.....
     
  14. BPM

    BPM JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 18, 2011
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    zinduna si kwamba tunapendelewa lakini naamini nyie ndo mna mchango mkubwa sana kuleta furaha
     
  15. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

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    Hongera saana Zinduna you had an opportunity ya kumjua nyanyako.... Kuna mambo wanayo ambayo yapo so constructive katika ndoa thou mambo mengine sikubaliani nayo. Hivo basi nina imani kabisa u-binti ulofundwa, hopefully utayafanyia kazi kwa practical... Wanasema mafahari mawili hayawezi ishi zizi moja... haiewezekani woote muwe 50/50 na mkadumu.... na nani awe chini ya 50 kama sio mwanamke... Unless other wise hupendi ujisikie na uwe treated as a woman.
     
  16. Kaizer

    Kaizer JF-Expert Member

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    wapi unaenda sa ivi Smile....Neno linasema Enyi waume....wapendemi wake zenu......kama Kristu alivyolipenda kanisa.....wale mke asikose kumstahi mumewe.....(Efe 5:25-32)
    Nami nitarudi baadaye 'kumalizia'
     
  17. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

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    BPM naona umejileta... Naomba u-justify....
     
  18. The Finest

    The Finest JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 18, 2011
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    Mwambie Cheusi anitafute nimpe hiyo manual ya Kamasutra (Drawn from the Indians)......Don't ask me questions kwa sababu hii thread ni kwa wanawake tu nilikuwa napita kusalimia.....lol
     
  19. Eiyer

    Eiyer JF-Expert Member

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    Nov 18, 2011
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    Hodi humu!Samahani kwa kuingia,najua hatukatazwi hata kuchombeza,ngoja niangalie wachangiaji ili come january nijue mashambulizi nayaanzia wapi,(nimebadili msimamo!)
     
  20. MwanajamiiOne

    MwanajamiiOne Platinum Member

    #20
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    Sweetheart, Nice stuff babygal. But, I say but, I doubt its sustainability, especially when those little ones start to arrive in the family na majukumu ya mama kuongezeka. Then huyu Mfalme unayemfuga humu ndani kwa lusts zote hizi ataanza kuwa mbogo kwa kuona baadhi zimepungua. All I can say ni take the basics- Heshima, care na trust.
     
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