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Kijana miaka 38 amempenda mwanamke wa miaka 44 leta maoni ya busara

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Zogwale, Oct 18, 2012.

  1. Zogwale

    Zogwale JF-Expert Member

    #1
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    Wanajamvi, kuna ndugu yangu ana miaka 38, mtoto wa baba yangu mkubwa tunaelewana sana. Aliweka appointment na mimi kuwa ana jambo la kunieleza na anaomba sana nimpe nafasi hiyo. Jana nilionana naye na jambo lake kubwa ni kuwa ana mwanamke anampenda sana ila ana miaka 44!!! Nilipatwa na butwaa japo sikutaka kumwonesha. Nikamuuliza tu taratibu, kinachokupeleka kwa mwanamke wa umri huo ni kitu gani? Alijibu kuwa amempenda kwa kuwa ametulia na yeye anataka mwanamke aluetulia kwa sababu hataki usumbufu wa kukimbizana na mabinti maana anataka ajenge uchumi imara ambao unahitaji mwanamke mtulivu. Ni kweli amejiariri mwenyewe na tayari alishazaa mtoto na mwanamke mwingine, ana miaka 6.

    Mimi inaniumiza japo sikumwambia maana kama mwanamke ana miaka 44 je wataweza kuzaa hata mtoto mmoja wa kuwaunganisha? Ila nilimwambia anipe wiki moja kuanzia jana nitampa ushauri anaoutaka barabara. Ninajua JF ni kisima cha mawazo, kuna weledi wa mambo hapa. Ninawaomba sana changia mada hii kwa ukweli na busara maana ni kitu cha ukweli si cha kufikirika ili nipate mawazo yako nipate kumshauri kijana ipasavyo. Asante sana na karibu kwa maoni na ushauri. Mimi Zogwale.
     
  2. Mamndenyi

    Mamndenyi JF-Expert Member

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    madameb njoo utoe maushauri hapa.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  3. snowhite

    snowhite JF-Expert Member

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    whats the big deal then?mbona wanatoshana tu jamani!
     
  4. snowhite

    snowhite JF-Expert Member

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    Mamdenyi huyo mwali wetu yuko ndani leo jamani kwanza unaitwa na gfsonwin kule mkoleni!
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  5. Zanta

    Zanta JF-Expert Member

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    Very contradict.. wewe umeshapewa sababu ya yeye kumpenda huyo mwanamke wewe ishu ya mtoto unatoa wapi?
     
  6. Mu-Israeli

    Mu-Israeli JF-Expert Member

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    Inaweza ikawa vigumu kutoa ushauri kama hao wahusika wameshapendana sana.
    Katika hali hii, labda huyo ndugu yako anatafuta uungwaji mkono katika swla lake hilo, na hatafuti ushauri.
    Mambo hayo huwa yanahitaji uangalifu mkubwa sana, maana unaweza ukajikuta unaonekana kuwa wewe ndio 'adui' wa mahusiano yao!!
     
  7. k

    kakada Member

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    Oct 18, 2012
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    Me ninavo ona kamawamependana na nimpango wa mungu waache waowan make ya mungu mengi na kama we mkristo unakumbuka sarah na mzee wa iman yaani ibrahim so kama
    nimapenzi ya mungu waache
     
  8. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

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    hivi nani kasema kwamba hawawez kuzaa? na je wanandoa waliooana wenye umri unaoshabihiana lkn wakakosa mtoto inamaana hawajaungana? na nai kasema mtoto ndo anawaunganisha tu?
     
  9. kalou

    kalou JF-Expert Member

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    Hata sijui tukushauri nini,
    anataka kumtongoza huyo mmama?
    anataka kumuoa?
    anataka kuishi naye ki-hawara?
    hebu fafanua kidogo.
     
  10. Mu-Israeli

    Mu-Israeli JF-Expert Member

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    Oct 18, 2012
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    Hapo kwenye blue,
    Mimi nimeshaona mwanamke aliolewa akiwa na miaka 48 !!
    Akapata mtoto akiwa na miaka 49 !!
    Mama na mtoto wako 'fresh' mpaka sasa, na mtoto yuko primary school hivi sasa.
    Hapo swala la kupata mtoto ni jepesi sana.
     
  11. Asprin

    Asprin JF-Expert Member

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    Oct 18, 2012
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    Age aint nothing but a number....!

    Maisha ni leo bana. Nani alikuhakikishia utafika kesho? Kama amependa akamate mchuchu ajie raha zake. Watoto kitu gani bana. Unaweza pata watoto ukajuta kwanini umewapata.

    Mwambie jamaa raha ajipe mwenyewe atii.
     
  12. a

    assuredly4 JF-Expert Member

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    nimesoma mada yako lakini ushauri wako kwake asikubali kumuoa huyo mwanamke kwasababu kuuzifuatazo-
    1. Katika mahusiano umri una msingi mkubwa wa kudumisha au kubomoa ndoa, kwa kuwa mwanamke ni mkubwa kiumri mara nyingi mwanaume hawezi kupata heshima anayotakiwa kupata, kwani wakati mwingine atakuwa anamtreat kama mdogo wake badala ya kuwa treated kama mumewe. Hili litazusha ugomvi kwani wanaume hatupendi kudharauliwa.

    2. Kipindi cha hamu ya tendo la ndoa kwa wanawake wengi hukoma mapema, hivyo endapo atamuoa, muda si mrefu hamu ya tendo la ndoa kwa mwanamke huyo itakoma na ataona mwanaume anamsumbua atakapokuwa anadai tendo hilo. mwanaume akikosa haki ya tendo la ndoa kwa kunyimwa na mkewe haya yanaweza kujitokeza
    (i) kumwamini mkewe kutapungua kwani atahisi ana mtu anatembea naye;
    (ii) upendo kati yao utaondoka, utakuwa mwanzo wake kuchelewa kurudi au kutafuta mwanamke mwingine nje ya ndoa ili amtimizie haja ya tendo la ndoa;
    (iii) ugomvi kati yao unaweza kutokea
    (iv)uwezekano wa mwanamke huyo kumzalia mtoto katika usalama ni mdogo, sasa amefikia katika kipindi ambacho kitabibu haishauriwi sana mwanamke kuzaa katika umri huo, kikomo wanadai 45 years, yy yuko 44 mpaka wafunge harusi apate mimba akijaliwa na kuzaa unaweza kukuta ana 46-48 years
    (v) wengi wa wananwake wa jinsi hii wamechezea ujana wao na wengine wana frustration zao, asije akahamishiwa hizo frustration na kupoteza future yake. mfano mpenzi wake aliyekuwa naye hadi yy akaingilia mahusiano ni vigumu kumuacha, wataendelea kuwa na mahusiano kwani mwanamke wa jinsi hii hawezi kumuamini yy kwa asilimia 100 kuwa atadumu naye,
    (vi) mwanaume hadi kupungua hamu ya tendo la ndoa inakuwa amefikia umri wa miaka 70, sasa je ataweza kuhimili kuishi bila tendo la ndoa katika kipindi chote kilichobaki.
    (vii) wanawake wa jinsi hii wana uzoefu mkubwa wa mambo mengi, yy atakapokuwa anaongea naye anaweza akadhani anaongea la maana wakati mwenzie anaona la kitoto, lini kitafuata, dharau na kujadiliwa barazani.

    3. kwa kuzingatia hayo ndiyo maana mwanaume anashauriwa kumuoa mwanamke anayemzidi umri kuanzia miaka 2 na isizidi miaka 10. ukweli ni kuwa mwanamke akizaa anapoteza vitu vingi katika mwili wake, hivi kadiri anavyokuwa mdogo kwako ndipo anazidi kuendana na ww kadiri anavyozaa. kwa ushauri wangu umzidi miaka kati ya 3-5 tu that becomes reasonable

    4. ili uweze kuwa baba na mwanamke akuheshimu unapaswa kuwa kiongozi na mshauri kwake. sasa kama yy anajua zaidi yako na ndiye anakuelekeza au kukushauri kila jambo, ubaba wako uko wapi?

    nitarejea baadae, ngoja nijenge taifa
     
  13. Z

    Zion Daughter JF-Expert Member

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    Wote wana age ya utu uzima tayari.Kama wamependana kweli hakuna shida.watoto matokeo ya Mungu..
     
  14. Zogwale

    Zogwale JF-Expert Member

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    Asante kalou. Anataka amuoe kabisa na ndiyo maana akaja kwa ushauri. Alichodai ni kwamba huyo mwanamke anampenda ila alimpa kazi ya kutaka jinsi ndugu watakavyompokea maana hataki kabisa kusikia maneno ya kumnanga na umri wake huo.
     
  15. Zogwale

    Zogwale JF-Expert Member

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    Asante Mkuu Zion Daughter. Kwa kweli umri wa kijana ni matured kabisa na anajua anachokitaka. Ninachotaka ni mawazo ya busara ili nimpe nguvu ya kuendelea naye. Yaani positive tu maana sitaki kabisa kumpa negative maana ameshaamua.
     
  16. telitaibi

    telitaibi JF-Expert Member

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    mwambie asikurupuke ajipange kimawazo na mtazamo wa kesho then akiamua kusuka fine.
     
  17. Zogwale

    Zogwale JF-Expert Member

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    Asante kwa mawazo mazuri sana mkuu. Ngoja na wengine wanipe mazuri kama ya kwako na nitayaweka vizuri kabisa kwake ilia baadaye asituletee matatizo ya mara mke vile mara hivi. Karibu tene kwa ushari baadaye mkuu. Umetoa mambo mazuri hapa.
     
  18. I

    Iwako Member

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    Oct 18, 2012
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    Zogwale, hapo ni heshima tu itawale umri haumati wamependana waacheni miaka nne tu,hy kaka nae pungu hy ilikuwa iwe siri yake binafc c kutangaza. Hayo tu.tupe kadi
     
  19. Z

    Zion Daughter JF-Expert Member

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    Oct 18, 2012
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    Kwa kweli hiyo ni very sensitive issue hasa kwa desturi zetu..Kwa wazungu sometimes huwa inakuwa kawaida..Cha msingi ni wao wenyewe kama wana amani moyoni.Mimi nilishawahi kuvunja mahusiano kama hayo kwa kuwa nilikuwa najihisi(nilijikataa mwenyewe) kuhusiana na hii issue ya age..Sikuwa na amani japo kijana alikuwa yupo ok...
    Labda muulize kama huyo nduguyo ana amani..Hiyo itamsaidia badae kuhimili vishindo kwa kuwa lazima watakumbana na opposition kutoka kwa ndugu na marafiki.. Japo baadae itakuwa jambo la kawaida
    Pia katika suala hili inategemea sana muonekano/mwili wa huyo mwanamke...wengine huwa hawazeeki na wanaonekana wasichana tu.. Hii pia itawasaidia kuongeza ujasiri wao....
     
  20. Kennedy

    Kennedy JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Oct 18, 2012
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    Kipenda roho!
     
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