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Kati ya haya makundi; lipi linaongoza kwa.........?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Kaunga, May 4, 2012.

  1. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #1
    May 4, 2012
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    Kusababisha ndoa zivunjike?

    Ndugu wa mke au Ndugu wa mume?

    Na unahisi kwa nini?

    Kama hauko kwenye ndoa;
    kumbuka ulivyokuwa kwa wazazi, ni kina nani walikuwa wanahatarisha/waliosababisha ndoa ya wazazi wenu kuvunjika?

    Je mlikuwa karibu na ndugu wa upande gani? wa baba au wa mama?

    Na mwisho nini kifanyike ili ndugu wasiingilie ndoa zetu?

    Weekend njema wapendwa!
     
  2. Smile

    Smile JF-Expert Member

    #2
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    mimi naona kuvunjika kwa ndoa ni wanandoa wenyewe bwana....
    ndugu wanaweza kuleta kwekwere ila izo ni changamoto tu.....
    kuachana ni kitu ingine kabisa ... ilo ni la wenye ndoa wenyewe
     
  3. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #3
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    Smile
    Kweli wenye maamuzi ya mwisho ni couple wenyewe; lkn pale ambapo waanzisha vuguvugu ni ndugu, mara nyingi huwa ni ndugu wa mume au wa mke? Kwa uzoefu hata wa wazazi.

    Mimi wazazi wangu walifikia kutengana kwa miezi kadhaa, thank God walishinda na kuishi pamoja mpaka kifo kilipowatenfanisha!
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  4. Smile

    Smile JF-Expert Member

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    wa mume aisee
    wasione mtu unapumua? wspecially wanawake..
    sijui tumeumbwaje ..... jamani
    mamamkwe na mawifi mmmmh......
     
  5. HOPECOMFORT

    HOPECOMFORT JF-Expert Member

    #5
    May 4, 2012
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    Mapenzi ni kati ya wawili,hata kama atatokea mwingine wa zaidi hapo kama kweli mlipendana chokochoko lazima zigonge mwamba.

    Kuvunjika kwa ndoa sidhani kama kunaweza kusababishwa na ndugu labda kama hamkua serious na mapenzi yenu hapo hata kama sio ndugu mtamsingizia shetani
     
  6. MadameX

    MadameX JF-Expert Member

    #6
    May 4, 2012
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    Sometimes wa ndugu wa mkepia wanaweza kusababisha madhara ya ndoa ya ndugu yao. Kuna wanawake wengine ndoa zao au nyumba zao control ziko kwa mama zao na ni kitu ambacho kinakuwa kinamkera mume, from there the war starts.
     
  7. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #7
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    Mimi nimeshajiuliza WHY sipati jibu; wewe wafikiri ni nini kinachowakera ndugu yao anapoishi kwa Amani na mkewe? Utashangaa kabla hajaoa wanamzonga kwanini haoi; akioa wanataka kumseparate!
     
  8. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #8
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    Nini hasa chanzo chake; au hatukubali kumuachia binti awe na familia yake? Tunataka aendelee kuwa responsible nyumbani tu? Au ni WIVU?
     
  9. M

    Mwanaweja JF-Expert Member

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    kila jambo hutegemea natukio lakini kweli sisemi sana ila ndugu kwa pande zote wanatakiwa kujua ndoa sio yao ni ndoa ya walio amua kuungana na ktegeneza familia moja
     
  10. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #10
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    Mimi nafikiri wengi tunapata shida ya kulet her/him go. Yaani kwa vile mmekuwa wote; basi unafeel unammliki na pia ukiona kitu fulani unaona kama huyo stranger anamtesa kaka/dada yako!

    Maana sina explaination yoyote! Kwetu sisi wanasema kaka ni mume wa maisha, huenda mke wa kaka yako unamuona kama mke mwenzio? Just wondering!
     
  11. ndyoko

    ndyoko JF-Expert Member

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    May 4, 2012
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    wanawake bwana, ukiwafikiria sana ni kama hawajui wanajisema wenyewe. Hapa ina maana hata wewe unakiri kuchangia kuharibika kwa ndoa ya nduguyo, lol!
     
  12. mgeni10

    mgeni10 JF-Expert Member

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    Naona kuvunjika kwa ndoa ni kwaajili ya wana ndoa husika kutokua na MSIMAMO IMARA KTK NDOA YAO

    Vipi kama wana ndoa mkaamua kuziba masikia na macho na kuyadharau yote wanayoyaleta hao waharibifu????????????
     
  13. sun wu

    sun wu JF-Expert Member

    #13
    May 4, 2012
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    In the end its not the people outside who breaks people up..., but its people within (naamanisha wawili bwana na bibi)

    Mkiwa na busara na kupendana mtajua nafasi za ndugu, jamaa na marafiki na nafasi yenu wawili katika ndoa.. (hata kama ndugu na mashemeji wana matatizo ni vema mkaelewa matatizo yao na kuwachukulia kama walivyo kwa busara..) tatizo linakuja kutaka kushindana nao.., na kumpa mwenza wako ultimatum (mimi au ndugu.., mimi au wazazi..) wakati mgeweza mkaongea kando na kusema tuwapuuze hawa na tuwachukulie kama walivyo...

    Every Family Have Them..... (The black sheep I mean...)
     
  14. M'Jr

    M'Jr JF-Expert Member

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    Dah kwanza kitendo cha kuachana huwa kinafanyika na wahusika wenyewe hivyo hivi vingine huwa ni vikorombwezo tu vya ziada. Ndio kuna external forces zikiwemo za ndugu hasa wa pande zote ambao huweza kuchangia migogoro (sio kuachana) kwenye mahusiano ya ndoa.

    Labda tuangalie hii migogoro hasa husababishwa na ndugu wa upande gani;
    Mara nyingi pande zote huwa zinachangia lakini hawa wafuatao ndio wanaoonekana kuchukua nafasi kubwa zaidi,
    Mama wakwe (Mama wa mume)
    Mawifi (Dada wa Mume)
    Lakini kwa sehemu kubwa zaidi ni wanandoa wenyewe hasa mke. Mke huchangia sana kwasababu kawaida baada ya kuwa kwenye ndoa majukumu mengi ya nyumbani huachiwa mke kuyatekeleza na mume hubaki na kazi ya kutafuta pesa (Hata kama mke pia anafanya kazi bado jukumu la mambo ya nyumbani hubaki kwake)

    Hali hii hufanya mke kuwa na maamuzi makubwa katika mambo yanayoendelea ndani ya nyumba kuliko mume, kiasi fulani hii hufanya mume kuonekana kama "kashikwa" na hapo ndipo mawifi na mama mkwe huweza kuingia ili kujaribu kumtoa kaka yao kwenye tatizo wanalokuwa wanaliona wao ni tatizo. Lakini pia wake wengi huchukua fursa hiyo kufanya mambo yaende murua kwa upande wao na ndio maana mtakubaliana na mimi kwamba katika nyumba nyingi utakuta ndugu wa mke ni wengi kuliko wa mume.

    Sasa mara nyingi waume kwakuwa hawashughuliki na nini kinaendelea nyumbani na kwakuwa mtu wanayekuwa naye karibu zaidi wakiwa nyumbani ni mke hufanya maamuzi mengi kulingana na maelezo ya wake zao ndio maana huweza kukuta anamfukuza mama yake mzazi nyumbani au ndugu zake. Sasa pale anapopata nafasi ya kusikiliza upande wa pili na kujua ukweli ndipo kuvunjika kwa ndoa kunapokuja. Ndio maana mtakubaliana na mimi kwamba wake wengi huwa hawapendi kabisa ndugu wa mume awe karibu na mume wake pale wanapowatembelea kwa namna yoyote ile.

    Huu ndio mtizamo wangu
     
  15. F

    Finallyheretoo Member

    #15
    May 4, 2012
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    Mimi kwa mtazamo wangu naona kuvunjika kwa ndoa kunasababishwa na wanandoa wenyewe na sio ndugu wa upande wowote ule, kama kuna upendo Kati Yao then ndugu wataona aibu kuingilia kati! Cz wanajua kabisa haawatasikilizwa!
     
  16. Prince Nadheem

    Prince Nadheem JF-Expert Member

    #16
    May 4, 2012
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    mi binafsi yangu nikiangalia naona mara nyingi source inategemeana na mlivyojenga mahusiano yenu maana yake kama ni ndoa ambayo ilifungwa huku kukiwa na loose ends somewhere basi ni ule upande ambao hawakubariki hilo tukio ndio watakao kuwa chanzo.
    mathalani wakati wa uchumba labda kulikuwa na tofauti za kidini au kabila au tofauti nyingine zozote za kijamii ambazo nyie mliridhiana kama ni wapenzi ila wao hawakuwa tayari kwa hizo tofauti zenu hivyo wao watalianzisha lolote lile ili wapate kujustify assumtion zao kwa hali yoyote ile so be it ndugu wa kiumeni au kikeni.
    nina hii experience kutoka kwa wazazi wangu ambapo ndugu wa baba hawakuwa tayari baba kuoa kutoka dini nyingine hivyo walijitahidi sana kuanzisha songombingo but thank God my parents stood firm to the end. so far mi naona hili jambo lipo subjective.
     
  17. Ennie

    Ennie JF-Expert Member

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    May 4, 2012
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    Ndugu wa mume ni janga kubwa sana.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  18. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #18
    May 4, 2012
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    M'Jr na Prince Nadheem

    Asante kwa kushare ecperiences zenu. Kweli wanandoa wakiwa firm, hakuna ndugu anaweza vunja ndoa. Ingawa lawama au hata kususiana kwaweza endelea.
     
  19. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

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    sun wu
    Ushauri nilioupata toka kwako, ni couples kuwa na msimamo juu ya nafasi ya ndugu katika mahusiano!

    Vipi hili la kukaa na ndugu wa upande wowote; halikaribishi maneno?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 4, 2016
  20. Evelyn Salt

    Evelyn Salt JF-Expert Member

    #20
    May 4, 2012
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    inanisikitisha kusema hadi mama smtmz yuko responsible na hili...aaaaagggggrrrrr
     
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