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Kama una wivu ujue huna upendo bali una tamaa ya mwili wa mwenzio!!!!!!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Mtambuzi, Sep 21, 2011.

  1. Mtambuzi

    Mtambuzi Platinum Member

    #1
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Tendo la ndoa linapopewa uzito mkubwa kwenye uhusiano wivu ni lazima utakuwa mkubwa. Mtu akiacha tendo la ndoa na wivu huondoka. Wapenzi ambao hawapendani na kufikia mahali hakuna anayetaka kusikia kuhusu tendo la ndoa, kamwe hawaoneani wivu. Unafikiri ni kwa nini? Ni kwa sababu wivu unatoka kwenye tendo la ndoa na siyo mahali pengine.

    Kwa hiyo ukitaka kuacha wivu inabidi ulibadili swala la tendo la ndoa liwe upendo. Kama ukipenda mtu ile kumpenda tu ni dhamana na usalama wa kutosha kuwa hatakwenda kwa mtu mwingine. Kama kweli unampenda mtu utajua kwamba huwezi kwenda kwa mtu mwingine. Lakini kama akienda ujue hakuna upendo na huwezi kufanya lolote ameamua kwenda ni yeye. Hata kama utaamua kumuua bado haina maana kwa sababu maiti haina matumizi yeyote ya maana huwezi kuipenda.

    Kama kuna wivu ujue kabisa hakuna upendo bali hapo kuna tamaa ya mwili ambayo imefichwa nyuma ya neno kupenda. Kilichopo kati yenu ni tendo la ndoa tamaa ya mwili lakini siyo upendo. Mtu anayependa analijua jambo hili kwa sababu hana wivu. Hivyo hana shida ya kukagua simu ya mwenzake kuchakura mifuko au mikoba yake au kumtumia watu wamlinde.

    Hatukufundishwa kupenda na hivyo wengi hatujui hata kupenda maana yake ni nini. Tumefundishwa kwamba watu wawili wakisema ni wapenzi jambo linalo wafunga ni tendo la ndoa. Ndiyo maana unaweza kusikia “yule mwanamke aliyemuoa alikuwa Malaya sana” nguvu inawekwa kwenye tendo la ndoa siyo mahali pengine. Lakini huyu Malaya anapopenda hawezi tena kuwa Malaya. Kama alikuwa Malaya ni kwa sababu hajawahi kupenda. Watu wanaishi kama hawaishi, wanaishi kwa kuogopana. Kila mmoja anamwogopa mwenzake anaamini kwamba atatoka atamwacha. Unajiuliza ni kwa nini hawa watu wanaishi pamoja kama wanaogopana? Lakini siku zinaenda na maumivu yanaendelea.

    Kumbuka kwamba uaminifu upo au haupo. Kama haupo huwezi kuulazimisha kwa kutumia wivu. Wivu ni dhana ya kujaribu kuleta uaminifu lakini haina nguvu hiyo. Kama uaminifu upo basi hapo kuna kupenda. Kama uaminifu haupo huwezi kuuleta wewe. Ni bora kujitenga kwa sababu huamini kwamba unaweza kuishi bila huyo mwenzio, kwa hiyo unajaribu kulazimisha kutafuta uaminifu.

    Kama hakuna uaminifu basi hakuna haja ya kufanya uharibifu, Una haja ya kujua tu kwamba huyo mwenzako ambaye unampenda hawezi kupokea upendo. Kumbuka upendo wako unapomwagika kila ukiutoa inachosha. Huna haja ya kuchoka au kuumia….. toka

     
  2. Angel Msoffe

    Angel Msoffe JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Mmmmmh! Kwahy upendo unatokana na tendo la ndoa? Au tendo la ndoa linatokana na upendo?
     
  3. K

    Kima mdogo JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Ni gazeti gani hilii?
     
  4. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Mhhhhhh
    interesting
     
  5. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #5
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Huu wivu naona imekua issue kukubaliana kama ni nzuri ama lah!
    Mtambuzi mie wangu ana wivu, kama ndo dalili ya kua na tamaa
    na mwili wangu sio mbaya saana - kwamba we have been married
    for long na bado ana tamaa na mwili wangu... What mo' would i want??
     
  6. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Sep 21, 2011
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    kuna kitu hapa hakipo sawa..
    mfano wale waliwa choka wake zao na kuwaacha bila sex kwa miezi..
    hawana wivu?wakijua unatoka na wake zao hawaumiii??????
     
  7. Husninyo

    Husninyo JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Kama kuna kaukweli vile.
     
  8. Roulette

    Roulette JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Mi sikubaliani kabisaaaa na mtoa mada.
    Watu mnaacha kupendana na ndio mnaacha kufanya mapenzi. hamwezi kupendana na msifanye mapenzi.
    Kwaq hiyo ukiona watu hawafanyi mapenzi jua tayari hawapendani na dio maana hawaoneani wivu.
    Wivu hupotea kutokana na mapenzi kutokuwepo na wala sio sababu ya kutofanya mapenzi. zote mbili ni consequences sema moja inaweza kuja kabla ingine ikachelewa kidogo
     
  9. A

    Ave Ave Maria JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Mapenzi mwenzie wivu jamani japo ukizidi inakuwa kero!
     
  10. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #10
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Naona Wivu una levels zake tofauti, as in what that man will do akijua
    hivo... But siamini kua eti sababu mke hana mvuto tena kwa mumewe
    basi atakubali tu na kufurahi the wife atapotoka... Bila kuumia...
     
  11. AshaDii

    AshaDii Platinum Member

    #11
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Kipipi hebu rudisha Avatar bana! (habari yako).... kwa hiyo wee unataka shem akutreat ka sister wake??
     
  12. Kbd

    Kbd JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Sep 21, 2011
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    I strongly disagree
     
  13. Kabakabana

    Kabakabana JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Sep 21, 2011
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    mimi ndo maana sinaga hayo mambo ya wivu
     
  14. A

    Ave Ave Maria JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Sema ukweli habari yangu leo haijakaa njema kabisa sijui kwa upande wako! Avatar nimejaribu kuirudisha lakini imegoma lol! BTW, mi sitaki kutreatiwa ka sister ndo maana nikasema mapenzi mwenzie wivu!
     
  15. nyumba kubwa

    nyumba kubwa JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Hiyo tunaita selfishness. Ndio maana wivu mi sifagilii kabisa maana anayenionea wivu ni ngumu kujua kama ni love yake kwangu au love yake kwake. Kuna mtu unakuta yeye ana vimada hata kumi lakini akimuona mkewe hata katabasamu tu na mtu ni kibano. Sasa hiyo ni love au kujipenda mwenyewe kupitiliza?
     
  16. Memo

    Memo JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Sep 21, 2011
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    Me maself and I, like u vere vere!
     
  17. M

    MORIA JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Sep 22, 2011
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    Dear.. jinsi ulivyotaja hivyo vimada 10 huo nao ni wivu...wivu nduguye mapenzi...wivu mzuri una afya ndani yake..
     
  18. Mtambuzi

    Mtambuzi Platinum Member

    #18
    Sep 22, 2011
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    Una haki ya kutokubaliana na mimi kwa sababu labda hukuelewa nazungumzia kitu gani. Ninapozungumzia wivu simaanishi kwamba watu wasiwe na wivu, la hasha, hili ni swala la kimaumbile zaidi na kulizuia nitakuwa napingana na kanuni za kimaumbile. kwa mfano, wanasaikolojia wamethibitisha kwamba wanaume wivu wao umeegemea zaidi kwenye tendo la ndoa tofauti na wanawake ambao wivu wao ni wa kihisia zaidi kwa maana ya kutaka ukaribu na wenzi wao. ni rahisi sana mke kumsamehe mume kama atamfumania na mwanamke wa aina ya one night stand au wale wa chapchap kama wanavyoitwa lakini sio kuwa na nyumba ndogo, hapo ina maana kwamba nyumba ndogo imepora ule ukaribu na mume wake. Kwamba kama mumewe alikuwa anataumia muda wake mwingi nyumbani baada ya kutoka kazini, ni dhahiri kwamba kuna muda utakuwa unaishia kwa nyumba ndogo......... kwa upande wa wanaume wao wivu wao umejikita kwenye tendo la ndoa zaidi, na ndio maana ni vigumu mume kumsamehe mkewe pale atakapomfumania......... kuna maswali mengi sana yataenda kichwani mwake.............'duh! yaani ndio keshamegwa, sasa kama jamaa ni mzuri kitandani zaidi yangu atamwacha kweli' ili mradi atajiuliza maswali chungu mzima lakini yakiwa yamelenga kwenye tendo la ndoa zaidi.............
    lakini pia kanuni ya maumbile inathibitisha kwamba wanaume huwa na wivu zaidi wakati wa zile siku za hatari za wake zao, kwa nini?
    Mimi sijui, kwani swala hili ni la kibailojia zaidi................
    Kwa hiyo wivu si dhambi, ila pale wivu unapokuwa kero na kulindana kwingi, basi ujue ndani ya wivu huo matamanio ya mwili yamechukua nafasi zaidi............................
     
  19. Mtambuzi

    Mtambuzi Platinum Member

    #19
    Sep 22, 2011
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    Upendo kwanza, kisha tendo la ndoa litafuata............... labda nikuulize swali, kama ikitokea mume au mke amepata tatizo la kiafya ambalo limesababisha ashindwe kufanya tendo la ndoa, ina maana hapo kutakuwa hakuna upendo? au ndio tuseme ndoa itabidi ife?
     
  20. Mtambuzi

    Mtambuzi Platinum Member

    #20
    Sep 22, 2011
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    AshaDii, nimekuelewa, nimejaribu kujibu hayo maswali kwa kujumuisha, pale nilipomjibu RussianRoulette.
    Kama utakuwa hujaridhika na majibu yangu, nakukaribisha kuuliza maswali zaidi. nitajitahidi kuyajibu kwa kadiri ya upeo wangu...........
     
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