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Kama huyu ndo wakuoa!! Nishaurini jamani maana niko njia panda kwa kweli...

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by GODLIVER CHARLE, Jan 23, 2012.

  1. GODLIVER CHARLE

    GODLIVER CHARLE Member

    #1
    Jan 23, 2012
    Joined: Mar 2, 2011
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    Nisingependa nianzie mbali sana bali nieleze tu kwa ufupi na kwa ufasaha.

    Nimekuwa na binti mmoja miaka minne niliyempenda sana na hata sasa nampenda sana naamini hata nikimtaja kwa jina sio vibaya maana hata yeye kama ni mwana jf anajua nampenda sana (Elizabeth N. Natrovoki-El)

    Kwa kweli kwa kipindi chote hicho hatukuwahi kushirikiana koimwili (mapenzi) na tumeahidiana kuoana. Sote tulikuwa tunasali Anglican, na tulipatana sana, na tulishirikiana vilivyo ktk kupangilia maisha yetu ya baadae kielimu na kimaisha pia.

    Na moja ya mambo tuliyopangilia ni pamoja na kujiwekea mikakati ya kulinda uhusiano wetu pamoja na kuwa na ndoa ya furaha na amani kwa kuwa pamoja kwa kilakitu ikiwa ni pamoja na imani moja na kumtumikia Mungu kwa uaminifu sana mimi na mke wangu huyo mtarajiwa.

    TATIZO: Tulipofika mwaka wa pili wa masomo chuoni (TUMAINI UNIVERSITY) mwenzangu akabadilisha imani na kujiunga na assemblies of God kwa imani ya ubatizo wa maji mengi. NA HAPO NDIPO TOFAUTI ZILIPOANZIA. Jamani nilijitahidi kwa vipawa vyote na imani yote niliyonayo ktk Mungu na Ufahamu wa neno la Mungu kwa kadri nilivyojaliwa kumuelewesha mpenzi wangu huyo arudi tuendelee na uhusino wetu ila hakutaka bali kukawa na mivutano mingi sana na mara nyingine hata kutaka kuachana LAKINI kila tukifanya hivyo tunajikuta tupo pamoja.

    Wana Jf, hadi tumealiza chuo mwaka jana tupo tu twafutana. Kwa kweli nimekuwa njia panda toka 2009 hadi januari hii jamani. Mwaka jana mwezi Novemba nilitaka nikajitambulishe na kuaza kulipa mahali lakini lakini tofauti zetu hizi jamani za kiimani hazitufanyi twende sawa kabisa, nilitoka Dar kwenda kwao Monduli kwa ajili ya kufanya hivyo ila haikuwezekana. HATA HIVYO akasema atarudi ili tuwe na imani sawa (kwani mwanzoni alikuwa anataka na mimi vivyo nimfuate Assemblies ndo nimuoe) na hapo niliamua kumpa muda mfupi sana ili kabla ya januari niweze kwenda kwao na kuanza kufuata taratibu za kumuoa.

    LAKINI hadi inafika mwezi wa 12 mwaka jana jamani nilimuuliza kwa msg bado unaendelea kusali assemblies? HAKUNIJIBU hadi baadae sana nilivyompigia tukaongeaaaaaaa na baada ya maongezi kwa vile hakuigusia msg nikamuuliza ulipata msg yangu? akaitika ndio, nikamuuliza mbona hujanijibu? akasema jibu lake ni NDIYO. Wana JF sikutaka tena kujadili swala la imani wala kanisa, baada ya kutafakari sana nikamwambia tusipotezeane muda hapa palipofikia napotezea hata kama ni muda mrefu kumekuwa na uhusiano naasume hasara ya muda maana sasa nataka nioe lakini hauna mwelekeo. AKANIJIBU:"UNANIAMBIA NINI? SIKUELEWI NA SITOKAA NIKUELEWE, NINACHOJUA WEWE NI MUME WANGU, TUMEKUWA WOTE MIAKA MINNE NA NITAKUWA NA WEWE MILELE." WANA JF, na mara zote kila nikifanya uamuzi huu wa kuachana ananigomea hataki tuachane lakini hataki kufuata navyotaka tuwe. NA MIMI NATAKA SASA NIOE JAMANI NIMECHOKA NDUGU ZANGUNI KUNG'ANG'ANIA UBACHELA JAMANI HEBU NAOMBENI USHAUTI KWA KILA MTU AONAVYO YEYE THEN NITACHUJA NA KUJUA NI UAMUZI GANI NIFANYE. THIS IS SERIOUS HADI SASA SINA HAKIKA NITAMUOA YEYE AU NITAFUTE MKE NIACHANE NAE. Ila baada ya shauri zenu nitafanya maamuzi. ASANTENI.
     
  2. ndetichia

    ndetichia JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jan 23, 2012
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    mpige chini kwani huyo ni kigeugeu utakuja jutia uamuzi wako usiku mwema..
     
  3. PakaJimmy

    PakaJimmy JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Jan 23, 2012
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    Kikubwa kitakachokukwaza akiwa Mlokole ni nini?
    Mzee unaona ishu sana kuacha pombe siyo?
     
  4. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Jan 23, 2012
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    Duh
    Wote ni wakristu; utofauti wa madhehebu ndio uvunjd uchumba wenu? Yaani mimi sioni shida kabisa hap.
     
  5. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jan 23, 2012
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    Unaoa dini yake? Assemblies si ni wakristo kama Anglicans? tatizo ni nini tuelimishane.....au kumfuata huko assemblies?

    Hili linatatulika kama wote mna nia moja, ingekuwa muislamu na mkristo ningeona ugumu au anglican na msabato...

    Omba msaada wa watu wazima wazungumze nae pia....sioni kama hii ni sababu ya kumuacha!
     
  6. Amavubi

    Amavubi JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Jan 23, 2012
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    Kwa kuwa suala lako limekaa kidini kuna jamaa mmoja mpigie simu kupitia sekretary wake anaitwa Yeremia, angalia kwenye phone holly book namba ya huyo katibu muhtasi ni 33:3, ni mshauri wa Ajabu sana..............!!!Hutajuta ndugu yangu....kama sivyo nisingalikuambia........
     
  7. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jan 24, 2012
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    Inaweza ikawa kikwazo dearest. . .
    Kuna mtu alikua analalamika hapa kwamba mke wake anatumia ulokole kukataa unyumba, na hata akikubali hamna cha mautundu wala nini. Kama wataendelea inabidi waongelee hilo la sex kujua itakuwaje. Wasije wakabebana alafu jamaa akaishia kutafuta nyumba ndogo.
     
  8. Michelle

    Michelle JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Jan 24, 2012
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    Kwa misingi hiyo aweza kuwa sahihi kumkataa dearest....manake akinyimwa unyumba ndo atapata jaribu la kuzini nje ya ndoa,bora kumuepuka mapema kama nae ni extremist!
     
  9. Nyalotsi

    Nyalotsi JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jan 24, 2012
    Joined: Jul 20, 2011
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    kuna utofauti mkubwa kati ya mvulana na mwanaume. Kulikuwa na haja gani ya kutaja jina lake humu? Akiambiwa na shosti zake si atakuona *****? Huyu jamaa anaonekana anaogopa kuacha ze bingwa,hakuna sababu nyingine.
     
  10. Jestina

    Jestina JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Jan 24, 2012
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    oa kwa sababu mtu umempenda na sio sababu its covenient umri umefika na unataka watoto na mtu wa kukupikia nyumbani......mie sidhani kama huyo dada unampenda,uko naye kwa sababu na wewe unahitaji kuwa na mtu...which is wrong to me,.........
    sidhani dhehebu tofauti ni kikwazo,watu wameoa waislam na bado mambo yakaenda,simpooo kila mtu abaki na dhehebu lake,kama mlivyokuwa wachumba kila mtu na dhehebu lake na kwenye ndoa mbaki hivyo hivyo.....au la tueleze nini tatizo litakalotokea iwapo kila mtu atabaki na dhehebu lake ili tukusaidie zaidi....maana tunacoment hatujui nini tofauti ya hayo madhehebu mawili endapo kuna ugumu kuuoana ..................ningekushauri badilisha dhehebu nenda la kwake oa then rudi kny dhehebu lako baada ya watoto wawili lol ila nitaonekana mie wa kuzimu buree lol .......................watu mna msimamo mikali when it comes to dini mpk mnatisha kha!
     
  11. Husninyo

    Husninyo JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Jan 24, 2012
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    hizi imani jamani sometimes ni tabu tupu.
     
  12. m

    mzabzab JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Jan 24, 2012
    Joined: Aug 18, 2011
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    and the drama continues...sasa ndugu yangu mie nakupa pole sana kweli wanawake niwatamu tena sana ila wana drama..na hii ndio trela ndugu yangu full movie ukishaingia ndani ya ndoa (uzuri na sie wanaume drama yetu ni vimada hahahah) back to main point. mie naona hapa imani bwana ni kitu important na huyu ana haki kabisa ya kuchagua wapi kwenda yeye. wewe pia. sasa kama wewe una value sana imani kwamba wote muwe dini moja basi ni vizuri umuache na utafute wa dini kama yako.

    kuhusu yeye kuleta vitisho vya kutoachika...ebwana strange things have happend. ni kweli kuwa wewe hawezi kukulazimisha umuoe ila bana anaweza leta drama mpaka ata ukakosa raha maishani hapa. now wewe ndio upo kwenye position ya kujua kama huyu female stays true to her words ama ndio maneno na no action. 4 years ni mingi hivyo wapaswa kujua kama hiki kitisho ni real au tingisha kiberiti. all in all brother dnt marry her. pole once again for the drama
     
  13. T

    T.K JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Jan 24, 2012
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    Hope na wewe umetumia jina lako halisi maana umemtaja la kwake kitu ambacho huenda asikipende sana......naomba nikushauri kama ifutavyo:

    Wanaume/Wanawake wa kilokole wanaona kuoa/kuolewa na mvulana/msichana asiye mlokole ni kukosea.....atakapomshirikisha mchungaji swali la kwanza litakuwa huyo mwenzako amaeokoka? kama jibu no mzee tegemea kukatailwa.

    Ni vema pia na wewe ucije ukaingia ulokole ili tu kumpata huyo msichana, bali ingia ukiwa na nia thabiti juu ya imani hiyo.......Ushauri wangu ni kuwa kwa wakristu wengi Mwnamke hufuata dhehebu la mwanaume.. hapo swali ni je wewe unakubali imani ya wokovu?? kama jibu ni ndiyobaci sio shida maana unaweza ukaokoka ukawa unasali anglican au ukaamua kumfata huyo bibie huko au huyo bibie akakufuata huko (kitu ambacho nahisi kimeshashindikana).....La hasha kama wewe hukubaliani na imani ya wokovu bac achana nae huyo binti maana hatakukubali based on facts nilizokwambia hpo juu kabisa
     
  14. BrownEye

    BrownEye Member

    #14
    Jan 24, 2012
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    Mimi sina shida na Ulokole wala kuokoka, shida yangu kubwa hapa ni attitude ya huyo bint baada ya kuokoka, kinachotegemewa mtu akiokoka ni kwamba anakuwa anamjua Mungu vizuri pia anapata hekima (kwa neema ya Kristo) ya namna ya kuweka mambo sawa ikiwa pamoja na maamuzi na kuwaelimisha wengine(kupitia neno la Mungu) kuonyana na kurudiana kwa upendo na nk. Sio dharau, ubaguzi, vijembe,kujisikia bora kuliko wengine, vitisho na mambo mengine yanayofanana na hayo.

    Nachelea kuamini kwamba kama watu mlipendanda na hakuna baya lolote limetendeka eti mchumba akaulizwa swali na mchumba wake akabaki kimya hadi aulizwe tena meseji ulipoata? sikuona kama alitumia hekima kunyamaza bali angeweza kujibu kwa busara ingeweza hata kuwa sababu ya mwezi kutoa maamuzi ya kumjoin au vinginevyo.

    kuhusu yeye binti eti kujifanya bado anapenda na anahakika ni mume wake napo mhhh sijui!!!! maana watu huwa wanatumia 'kiroho'au dini au misimamo fulani kuwatoka wapenzi wao kiana na huku wanajifanya bado wapo kwenye penzi kumbe hamna kitu ila wanakurusha roho wee hadi ukate tu tamaa mwenyewe na uonekane wewe ndio umebwaga manyanga na sio yeye. kuna wengine huwa wanasingizia ukiniacha nitakunywa sumu kumbe hakuna lolote yeye mwenyewe tayari kishakuacha kitamboooooo.

    kijana wewe ni mtu mzima naomba suala hili nenda nalo polepole, usiwe na haraka ya kuoa wala kuacha, ipo siku utaujua ukweli ukweli huwa haufichiki muda siku zote huleta majibu yote. sikushauri ubwage manyanga nashauri umuombe Mungu akusaidie kukufungua macho vizuri uone ukweli wa mambo je ni dini au kuna jambo limejificha ndani yake?
     
  15. jacjaz

    jacjaz JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Jan 24, 2012
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    jaman,kimsingi walokole hawatakiwi waolewe na mtu asiye na imani za wakovu!yaan,madhehebu mengine yasiyo ya kipentecoste!
     
  16. Dennismakoi

    Dennismakoi Member

    #16
    Jan 24, 2012
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    Mzee unaibisha,,
    kwani hao wanamwabudu nani na Aglican mnamwabudu nani?
    Siku wote Yesu Kristo,, sasa mnabishana nini, kila mtu was na uhuru wa kumwabudu Mungu ila mchague sehemu specific ya kufuata ndoa, mimi wa tunasali tofauti but tunapambana sana coz Yesu ni wa wote...
     
  17. MadameX

    MadameX JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Jan 24, 2012
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    Mimi naona kama wewe ndio unazidisha mambo, kusali makanisa tofauti sioni kama kosa kubwa. Ikiwa watu wa dini tofauti wanaoana na kuishi pamoja sembuse nyie. Mimi nahisi labda upendo baina yenu umepungua, but not religion issue.
     
  18. Lighondi

    Lighondi JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Jan 24, 2012
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    Mimi sioni tofauti ya madhehebu kama ni shida lakini naona shida katika mtazamo na mfumo wa kufikiri, kuamua, kutatua na kushirikisha. Kama wote wanaabudu kitu kimoja ilikuwaje ahame kanisa? Na kama ana sababu za kutosha za kufanya hivyo alishindwa nini kumshirikisha mtu wake kwa upole kabisa akaelewa na kufikia muafaka? Mimi ninamuona binti kama mtu ambaye hapendi kushirikisha mwenzie katika maamuzi yake. Na anaamini kwamba maamuzi yake ni sahihi na hayastahili kupingwa, na anaitaka hiyo ndoa kwa ajili tu ya status mtaani na yeye aonekane mke wa mtu. Nasema hivi kwa sababu kabla hajabadili msimamo alitakiwa kujadiliana na mwenzake au kufikiri mustakabali wa maisha yake ya ndoa hapo baadae. Hata ilipokuja kujulikana wazi kuwa kubadili kwake dini imekuwa tatizo kwao, haoneshi juhudi zozote za kuliweka sawa hilo (kwa mujibu wa mtoa mada). Kwangu mimi hii ni hatari sana kwa maisha ya ndoa ya badae. Hii inaleta maana gani katika mfumo wa maisha ambao tunasadikishwa kwamba watu wawili wanakuwa mwili moja (sharing almost everything). Imeandikwa wanaume wapendeni wake zenu na wanawake WATIINI waume zenu. Kama mwanzo ndio huu, Nina shida na utii wa baadae.Kwa maana hiyo mimi namshauri ampiga chini. Naona usumbufu mwingi zaidi toka kwa binti kuliko makubaliano siku za usoni.Mi maoni yangu tu jamani!!
     
  19. Cantalisia

    Cantalisia JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Jan 24, 2012
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    Mie hata con mnacholumbana,wote wakristo tofauti madhehebu tu!mie nahic wote mshachokana kilichobaki mnafanyiana vituko ili atakeshindwa aanze mbele!uchumba miaka 4??still mnazinguana kisa mathehebu?na huko ulokolen km kakutana na wale kina mama ushauri wanaowaona wasiookoka ni wadhambi con ndoa hapo labda na ww ukoke bac!
     
  20. Prof Gamba

    Prof Gamba JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Jan 24, 2012
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    Hicho kigezo cha tofauti ya madhehebu wala si tatizo. Tatizo ni ninyi na mipangilio ya future yenu na hasa huyo mwenzio aliyebadili dhehebu bila kujadiliana na wewe mapema. Mkitaka kuja kugundua kuwa hamkuwa sahihi na dhehebu haikuwa tatizo, piganeni chini then kila mmoja awe na mpango wake, baadaye mtakuja kujua kuwa kumbe hata mngesali sehem tofauti bado mngeoana na kufurahia maisha. Hautapita hata mwaka mtakuwa mmejifunza na endapo mmoja atakuwa kafanya maamuzi ya mahusiano mengine mtaumia tuu moyoni. Utaijua thamani yake baada ya kumpoteza aidha wewe au yeye. Ningewashauri mkae mlijadili vema kwa mapana na kwa maslahi ya future yenu, kama suala la kusali watoto na mengine. Kila la kheri na pole sana.
     
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