Dismiss Notice
You are browsing this site as a guest. It takes 2 minutes to CREATE AN ACCOUNT and less than 1 minute to LOGIN

Jifunze namna ya kuwavumilia wengine!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Mtambuzi, Aug 1, 2011.

  1. Mtambuzi

    Mtambuzi Platinum Member

    #1
    Aug 1, 2011
    Joined: Oct 29, 2008
    Messages: 8,572
    Likes Received: 692
    Trophy Points: 280
    Jifunze namna ya kuwavumilia wengine!
    Ukianza kutazama tabia na matendo ya watu ambao unakutana nao kwenye maisha yako ya kila siku kwa kujiuliza kile unachojifunza kutoka kwao utajikuta unaanza kuyatazama kwa jicho tofauti yale uliyokuwa ukiyaona hapo kabla kama maudhi au yenye kukatisha tamaa. Utaanza kuhisi ukipungukiwa na kiwango cha kukerwa, kuchanganywa na kubughudhiwa na vitendo na mapungufu ya wengine.

    Kama tutawatazama wengine na matendo yao kama waalimu wetu tutajikuta tukiondoa hali fulani ya chuki na kukerwa ambayo huwa tunakuwa nayo pale mtu au watu wengine wanapofanya kinyume na matarajio yetu.

    Muuguzi anapotutukana au anapotukaripia, badala ya kukasirika inabidi tujiulize tunachojifunza. Huenda tunajifunza kwamba ni hatari kwa mtu kuchagua kufanya kazi asiyoipenda.

    Lakini pia huenda tunajifunza huruma, kuwahurumia wengine ambao wanafanya kazi ambazo siyo uchaguzi wao bali kwa sababu ya shida.
    Basi linapo haribikia njiani, badala ya kukasirika inabidi tujiulize tunachojifunza. Huenda tunajifunza kuwa ni vizuri kuwa waangalifu tunapoamua kuchukua jukumu fulani kubwa maishani, au huenda tunajifunza kwamba tunaweza kujiandaa na kujiamini lakini mambo yakabadilika bila kutegemea au tunaweza kujifunza kwamba hakuna kitu kisichoweza kwenda kombo hata kama tukiamini kwa kiasi gani.

    Mfanyabiashara tapeli anapotuuzia mali mbovu au zisizo zenyewe hatuna haja ya kukata tamaa na kuchanganyikiwa badala yake inabidi tujiulize tunachojifunza kutoka kwake. Huenda tumejifunza hatari ya mtu kujali fedha au maslahi yake zaidi kuliko kujali maisha na matarajio ya wengine. Huenda pia tumejifunza jinsi inavyouma pale tunapowadhulumu wengine.

    Inapobidi kusimama kwenye foleni muda mrefu kusubiri huduma fulani, hatuna haja ya kukasirika na kuanza kujilauamu na kuwalaumu wengine. Badala yake inabidi tujiulize kile tunachojifunza katika tukio hilo. Huenda tunajifunza kuwa na subira maishani. Mara nyingi kusimama foleni ni kipimo kizuri sana cha kiwango cha subira aliyonayo mtu.Hii ni nafasi muhimu kwetu kujifunza subira na uvumilivu badala ya kukasirika na kukata tamaa.

    Inawezekana wewe unayesoma hapa unaweza kuliona jambo hili kama kichekesho au lisilowezekana. Lakini ukweli ni kwamba sio kazi ngumu kuwavumilia wengine.

     
  2. M

    Mokoyo JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Aug 1, 2011
    Joined: Mar 2, 2010
    Messages: 13,442
    Likes Received: 825
    Trophy Points: 280
    Mimi nakubaliana na wewe kwa asilimia nyingi tu, ni mambo yanayowezekana kama mtu yuko serious na maisha/afya yake. asante
     
  3. Mr Rocky

    Mr Rocky JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Aug 1, 2011
    Joined: Oct 10, 2007
    Messages: 15,057
    Likes Received: 325
    Trophy Points: 180
    Mkuu nakubaliana na wewe
    Ila hebu fikiria kuwa uko kwenye folani kusubiri huduma may be ya benki au posta. Kweli umevumilia kukaa kwenye foleni kwa muda mrefu na hujaona ubaya wake. Una moyo wa subira na huna kinyongo na uwepo wa foleni ile. Ila mhusika wa huduma hiyo kule mbele anaongea na simu kama ni mwanamke anaongea na bwanake au mpenzi wake jinsi jana yake alivyofaidi ile outing au kama ni mwanaume wanapanga namna wakitoka ofsini waende kiwanja gani na namna walivyofurahi jana yake kutokana na service z awale wadada walizopata.

    Muuguzi umeenda hospital una shida na ni mgonjwa badala ya kukuhurumia au kukusikiliza anaanza kukufokea kuwa wewe ni mzembe kw anini uugue ugonjwa kama huo. Kweli umejitahidi ulivyohisi dalili tuu za ugonjwa ukakimbilia kw anesi au doctor badala ya kukusikiliza kwa upole unaporoimoshewa matusi yasiyo na mpango. Kweli subira itakuwepo
     
  4. The great R

    The great R Senior Member

    #4
    Aug 1, 2011
    Joined: Jun 7, 2011
    Messages: 142
    Likes Received: 0
    Trophy Points: 0
    umenena vyema
     
  5. Rutashubanyuma

    Rutashubanyuma JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Aug 1, 2011
    Joined: Sep 24, 2010
    Messages: 61,428
    Likes Received: 492
    Trophy Points: 180
    majibu kwa maswali magumu....kila hali itaamua umuhimu wa kuvumiliana au kupasuliana ukweli..........kuvumiliana kwaweza kuwa vilevile ni kulea unafiki...................................na mnafiki kamwe haendi popote pale..............na jingine unafiki ni uchoyo kwa sababu unazuia kumpa mwenzio somo ambalo litamsaidia maishani kwake........kwa kumdanganya ya kuwa kila kitu ni shwari wakati sivyo...........
     
  6. Elia

    Elia JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Aug 2, 2011
    Joined: Dec 30, 2009
    Messages: 3,444
    Likes Received: 3
    Trophy Points: 135
    Nimeipenda hii mkuu, Yes a spoon should be called a spoon and not a spade...
     
  7. Tulizo

    Tulizo JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Aug 2, 2011
    Joined: Jun 13, 2011
    Messages: 842
    Likes Received: 18
    Trophy Points: 35
    Mkuu.. nimeipenda mada yako…

    Nakubali ni vizuri tukawavumilia wenzetu wanapotukosea. Lakini tukumbuke makosa mengine ni ya dhahiri na uzembe. Sisi kama binadamu tumeumbwa na hisia (emotions). Miili yetu ni rahisi kuguswa na hisia hizo (reaction) na hivyo kujikuta tunafanya matendo kwa haraka bila ya kufikiri.

    Naamini uvumilivu hauji kwa siku moja. Mwili unahitaji mazoezi, mwili unahitaji kujifunza jinsi ya kujidhibiti hasa wakati hisia (emotion) ziko juu. Kama tukiweza hili basi tutaweza kuwavumilia wenzetu wanapotukosea na pia tutaweza kuwakosoa mara moja. Kama mdau alivyosema hapo juu, uvumilivu unatakiwa usiwe wa kinafiki, ni upendo kwa binadamu mwenzako lakini sio kwa kumwacha aendelee kuharibu au kuharibika ila kumpeleka na kumnyoosha kwenda kwenye njia sahihi..

    Naamini, ili kuufundisha mwili kudhibiti hisia na changamoto za biolojia za mwili. Inabidi kwanza tujifunze ya kuwa, kumvumilia mtu inabidi kwanza wewe mwenyewe ujishushe na ulingane nae. Mfano mdogo ..mfagizi ofisi kila siku anachelewa kufagia nawe unakosa uvumilivu wa tabia yake. Hivyo basi wewe kama ni bosi inabidi ujishushe na kimawazo na kujiweka katika hali ya mfagiaji ili uje kwa nini kila siku ofisi inachelewa kufagiwa. Inabidi ujue maisha ya mfagizi, hapo badala la kukasirika utaweza kumsadia either kuondokana na uzembe, au kama sio uzembe kumpangia njia sahihi.

    Kama utaweza kujishusha, utaweza kuondokana na uvumilivu wa kinafiki. Utaweza kumvumilia na kumfundisha mtu kwa kujiamini; bila ya woga; jazba na kwa lugha ya kistaarabu. Utaweza kutoa fundisho kwa mkosaji au mzembe na kuchukua hatua zinazostahili hata kumwadhibu pale inapobidi.


    Kumalizia, nadhani uvumilivu ni kugumu kutokana na maumbile yetu wanadamu yaani muunganiko wa mwili na akili. Lakini kama tunaweza kuufundisha mwili kujidhibiti basi tutaweza kuwa na uvumilivu wa kweli na sio wa kinafiki. Kwa kujiamini tutaweza kuvumilia, kurekebisha na kuchukua hatua zinazostahili kumwadhibu mtu iwe kwenye daladala, hospitali, bank etc. Naposema kumwadhibu sio lazima kumpiga, lakini kumshtaki kwa bosi wake au Polisi kama hajajirekebisha ni adhabu tosha.
     
  8. Gaga

    Gaga JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Aug 2, 2011
    Joined: Jan 6, 2011
    Messages: 4,564
    Likes Received: 15
    Trophy Points: 0
    sasa kwa nn vitabu vya dini vinahubiri uvumilivu?au huu ni wa aina nyingine?na wahenga je waliposema mvumilivu hula mbivu!walikosea?
     
  9. BlackBerry

    BlackBerry JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Aug 2, 2011
    Joined: Mar 22, 2011
    Messages: 1,844
    Likes Received: 3
    Trophy Points: 0
    mi nashangaa
    <br />
    <br />
     
  10. Masikini_Jeuri

    Masikini_Jeuri JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Aug 2, 2011
    Joined: Jan 19, 2010
    Messages: 6,819
    Likes Received: 339
    Trophy Points: 180
    Mtambuzi na Tulizo endelezeni kutufunza na ningependa tuongelee hasa uvumilivu baiana ya wanandoa hopefuly mko kwenye kundi hili.......huko kuna shida sana!
     
  11. Mkirua

    Mkirua JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Aug 2, 2011
    Joined: Sep 9, 2010
    Messages: 5,658
    Likes Received: 5
    Trophy Points: 135
    Sure mkuu
     
  12. Mamndenyi

    Mamndenyi JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Aug 2, 2011
    Joined: Apr 11, 2011
    Messages: 27,250
    Likes Received: 1,929
    Trophy Points: 280
    thank u, nitarudi hapa.
     
  13. U

    Ulimakafu JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Aug 2, 2011
    Joined: Mar 18, 2011
    Messages: 16,559
    Likes Received: 254
    Trophy Points: 180
    Kweli mtu wangu.
     
Loading...