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ingekua wewe unge fanyaje?

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by MwanaFalsafa1, May 10, 2009.

  1. MwanaFalsafa1

    MwanaFalsafa1 JF-Expert Member

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    Una tokea kupendana na mtu tena sana. mapenzi yenu yanaanza tokea mkiwa sekondari. Wazazi waka jaribu kuwa tenganisha waka shindwa. Chuoni mkaenda nchi tofauti lakini bado hilo laliku vunja penzi. Mkapitia yote hayo na mkaya shinda. Mna ahidiana kuwa hamta achana kwa lolote. Baada ya kupitia yote hayo na kuyavuka maisha yakawa tenganisha. Kwa bahati mbaya mawasiliano yakafa na taratibu mkaona penzi liki potelea haweni. Kila mmoja wenu anaona mwenzie atakua ameshaendelea na maisha yake kwa hiyo nyote mnaamua kuendelea na yenu........

    Sasa basi wakati umesha ingia ndani ya ndoa mpenzi wako yule wa zamani anarudi maishani mwako. Mnaonana tu bahati mbaya mtaani na mnaamua kukutana sehemu kupeana mipasho ya kale........

    Unamtaarifu husband/wife kuwa unaenda kukutana na an "old friend" kwa sababu hautaki ajue kuwa mtu huyo ulimpenda zaidi ya unavyo mpenda yeye sasa. Mkisha kutana lunch mnaanza kupeana habari. Mwenzio ana kuambia kuwa miaka yote hiyo alikua ana kutafuta na haja oa/kuolewa kwa ajili ya kuku subiria wewe. Anakuuliza kwanini ulivunja ahadi. Unatoa sababu kuwa ulidhani alisha pata mwingine nawe ukaamua kujua hamsini zako. Anakuambia kuwa bado ana kupenda tena sana. Kumbuka huyu ni mpenzi wako wa kwanza, mtu wa kwanza kuujua undani wako na ni mtu ambae bado unampenda tena sana na siku zote ulikua una tamani arudi maishani mwako........

    Sasa ndiyo kasharudi na ana kukumbushia ahadi mlizo peana na ukiangalia wewe ndiyo ulizi vunja na yeye alizi tunza zote. Tayari upo ndani ya ndoa.Wewe na mkeo/mumeo bado hamna watoto. Je uta fanyaje? Moyoni unajua fika unampenda huyu mtu zaidi ya uliye nae sasa. Unajua fika huyu mtu alikua chagua lako la kwanza. Umemuwaza mara nyingi na kulia ukijua umpendae atakua ana faidi penzi la mtu mwingine. Je utamuacha mwanandoa mwenzio? Utamuomba huyu mtu muwe marafiki wa kifamilia ili walau muwe mnaonana? Would you take this person as a best friend because to you it's better having some of them then not having them at all?...........

    It's a very hypothetical question I asked the woman I love. She cried when i asked her the question because she said unajua fika nakupenda kiasi gani lakini pia unajua fika sitoweza kusaliti ndoa. Wala sikua na nia mbaya lakini hilo swali lilifanya nifikiri sana, je ikiwa hivyo itakuaje? To me it made me realise how much I love my sweetheart & it has made me work harder not to loose her. I want to assure this never happens because I know I will never love anyone else as much as I love her. Swali ni ikiwa hivyo wewe unge fanyaje?
     
  2. Kyakya

    Kyakya JF-Expert Member

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    Ningekuwa mimi ningeendelea tu na ambaye tayari nimemuoa. Kwakuwa nadhani aliyekuwa rafiki yangu na ambaye nadhani nilikuwa nampenda she was not meant for me in the first place. Angekuwa kwa ajili yangu ningemuoa kabla ya huyu, na MARA nyingi wapenzi wanaokuwa marafiki muda mrefu toka utotoni ama shuleni huwa hawafungi ndoa kuna katafiti kadogo nimekafanya nikagundua hivyo. Na si kwamba unampenda kama unavyoweza kufikiri ila ni ujana na utoto unawafanya mdhani mnapendana. Ningekuwa mimi ningefanya hivyo Mkuu.
     
  3. MwanaFalsafa1

    MwanaFalsafa1 JF-Expert Member

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    Mkuu nashukuru ila kumbuka pia nimesema bado unampenda sana huyu mtu mkuu so hiyo ya kuwa haumpendi as you think haiwezi kuapply kwenye swali hili.
     
  4. Buswelu

    Buswelu JF-Expert Member

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    May 10, 2009
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    Bora kubaki marafiki na kuaaccept kila kilicho pita ni past kwa kweli....huyu bwana aliye muoa hujui upendo wake uko vipi?Anaweza kuwa hayuko tayari kumuacha kwa udi na uvumba....amedhamiria....so ni vyema na wewe kutafuta wa kwako...na yeye ambaki na mume wake....tena msijaribu hata kuibia penzi.Itawalinda sana kuendelea kuwa pamoja kwa amani ya roho hata mwili.
    Nime experiance hili....i had one since form 1 early 90s.Tukapoteza mpaka last 3 yrs tumeonana yeye hajaolewa na mie nimeoa....we had sometime out tukachat kumbusha one of those days tikakubaliana na yeye awe free kuolewa ingawa alisema yuko tayari nimpatie mtoto tu...then niendelee na maisha yangu...that is mistake....u can ever do..
    Kwani aliongoza kwa kunitumia card za birthday,christimas,love till namaliza O'level nilikuwa na card zake kama 700 hivi toka form 1.Tukapotezana since then nikakaa na picha zake na card wa two yrs..nikachoma card...nikabaki na card...after chuo nikachoma na picha nikabaki na moja..nilipo oa ikabaki moja kama kumbukumbu ya marafiki zangu...
     
  5. Buswelu

    Buswelu JF-Expert Member

    #5
    May 10, 2009
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    U have to accept the fact kuwa ameshaolewa mkuu....hakuna kitu kibaya kama kuiba cha mwanaume mwenzio put ur self kwenye nafasi ya huyu bwana aliye muoa unaye amini unampenda...love should not drive that far crazy....

    Mnaweza kubaliana kuoana jamaa kule akakataa kukubalia script hiyo akaleta vurugu...mpaka upendo wako huo ukaisha ukabaki wa kulazimisha...kumbuka hii sio movie ya kinaigeria ni really thing.
     
  6. MwanaFalsafa1

    MwanaFalsafa1 JF-Expert Member

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    Mkuu its a hypothetical question. Umejibu as if mimi nataka kuchukua mke wa mtu. Swali ni je ingekua wewe unge fanyaje? Yani wewe kama wewe ila ume jibu as if unanipa ushauri mimi. Kumbuka its a hypothetical question na ni wewe kama wewe unge fanyaje. Siyo kuwa I'm having that dillema.
     
  7. MwanaFalsafa1

    MwanaFalsafa1 JF-Expert Member

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    But all in all Busweli I get what you are trying to say. Nimeona tu nihakikishe kua unajua its a hypothetical question.
     
  8. Buswelu

    Buswelu JF-Expert Member

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    Nimejibu post kwenye post yangu ya kwanza.
     
  9. B

    Bibi Kizee JF-Expert Member

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    mimi ningekubali kubaki na huyo niliyenaye sasa maana mara nyingine kupenda unajifunza, kama ulipenda na mpenzi akakupotea na ukakutana na mwingine mpaka mkaoana ni kwamba umempenda au umejifunza kumpenda baada ya yeye kukupenda, hivyo ingawa humpendi kama yule wa mwanzo huna haja ya kusababisha maumivu kwa aliyekupenda na akakutoa katika upweke uliokuwa nao wa kupotelewa na mpenzi!!

    wa zamani ni kujitahdi kumtoa moyoni, na kumueleza ukweli kuwa ni vigumu kuwa naye kama mpenzi, naye atafute mwingine, ni ngumu ila inabidi ujilazimishe kubwa kucontrol nafsi,....kama ukweli ulimpenda na ulikuwa bado unamuhitaji usingeweza kuoa au kuolewa na uliye naye!!

    hayo ni mawazo yangu!!
     
  10. Andindile

    Andindile JF-Expert Member

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    Mi ningemkatalia kwa vile tayari ataniona kuwa nilishavunja uaminifu kwake. Pia hata kama anasema kuwa ananipenda kama nilivyo kuna obstacle kibao ambazo hapo baadaye zitakuja kuvuruga hayo mahusiano.
     
  11. Killuminati

    Killuminati JF-Expert Member

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    Ningekuwa mimi ningemkimbia kama ukoma, hakuna jipya goma lenyewe la long time kisha ushaoa, au ulioa kwa majaribio? Ingekuwa miaka ile ningemwambia pia kwa kuongezea kuwa imetoka ikirudi pancha.

    ....Ukikua naamini utaacha, nadhani unaelewa kinachokusumbua Mkuu.
     
  12. m

    manyusi JF-Expert Member

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    Ndugu biblia inatuonya juu ya kupenda mume/mke wa mwenzio kama hali hiyo imejitokeza ni bora ukachukua msimamo mwingine kumbuka huo sio mwisho wa dunia na unaweza pata mwingine mkapendana sana,inawezekana hiyo si mipango ya MUNGU wewe kuishi na huyo mume/mke na hujui unaepushwa nini mshukuru MUNGU na anza maisha mapya hijalishi ulimpenda kiasi gani.If you are a christian beliver read this;
    Luke 16:18 “Everyone who divorces his wife and marries 58 someone else commits adultery, and the one who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.

    Ephesians5:22-33
    Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord, 5:23 because the husband is the head of the wife as also Christ is the head of the church – he himself being the savior of the body. 5:24 But as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 5:25 Husbands, love your 33 wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her 5:26 to sanctify her by cleansing her 34 with the washing of the water by the word, 5:27 so that he 35 may present the church to himself as glorious – not having a stain or wrinkle, or any such blemish, but holy and blameless. 36 5:28 In the same way 37 husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 5:29 For no one has ever hated his own body 38 but he feeds it and takes care of it, just as Christ also does the church, 5:30 for we are members of his body. 39 5:31 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and will be joined to his wife, and the two will become 40 one flesh. 41 5:32 This mystery is great – but I am actually 42 speaking with reference to Christ and the church. 5:33 Nevertheless, 43 each one of you must also love his own wife as he loves himself, 44 and the wife must 45 respect 46 her husband.

    na hata kama umemkamata ugoni mkeo biblia inasema msamehe na umpende kama zamani. Hosea 3:1 The Lord said to me, “Go, show love to 1 your wife 2 again, even though she loves 3 another man 4 and continually commits adultery. 5 Likewise, the Lord loves 6 the Israelites 7 although they turn to other gods and love to offer raisin cakes to idols
     
  13. Exaud J. Makyao

    Exaud J. Makyao JF-Expert Member

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    MWANAFALSAFA,
    Kujichanganya ni hatari sana katika ndoa.
     
  14. MwanaFalsafa1

    MwanaFalsafa1 JF-Expert Member

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    Nakubaliana na wewe. It was a hypothetical question niliyo taka kujua majibu ya wengine. Haija nitokea tu binafsi ila nilitaka kujua maoni ya watu kwenye hili.
     
  15. Exaud J. Makyao

    Exaud J. Makyao JF-Expert Member

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    Nimekuelwa MKUU.
     
  16. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

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    ...dah, kwakweli umenichanganya. Huyo "sweetheart" wako ndio huyo old flame au unamaanisha Mkeo?
     
  17. Mbu

    Mbu JF-Expert Member

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    ...there is a reason for everything except love, kama ilivyo tofauti baina ya kuwa "in-love with someone" na "loving someone." Ingekuwa ni mimi katika scenario hiyo, ningebakia kwenye ndoa yangu na kujipa moyo, "huyo kimwana hakuwa riziki yangu!"
     
  18. Kaniki1974

    Kaniki1974 JF-Expert Member

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    Umepiga hatua nzuri mbele, wataka kurudi nyuma tena? Lt her/him go on.
     
  19. MwanaFalsafa1

    MwanaFalsafa1 JF-Expert Member

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    No Kaniki it was a hypothetical question na nimetoa scenerio tu. Siyo kuwa yameni kuta hayo. Ni kwamba mimi nina mpenzi wangu na nikajiuliza tu je mtu akimpoteza mtu aliye mpenda sana akarudi baadae ata fanyaje? Siyo kuwa yameni kuta mkuu sijaoa kwanza nimetoa tu scenerio.
     
  20. MwanaFalsafa1

    MwanaFalsafa1 JF-Expert Member

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    Asante mkuu mbu kwa kuhigh light hypothetical. Inabidi mtu anipe tafsiri ya hypothetical maana nawaeleza watu siyo kuwa yameni kuta ila nauliza tu hiyo scenario angei handle vipi. Ila kila mtu anaona kama aidha nataka kuvuruga ndoa ya mtu au yangu ahahaha. Nazani nisinge ongezea hicho kipengele cha mpenzi wangu maana watu wana shindwa kuelewa.

    Ila nimependa jibu lako. It's true maybe hakua ridhiki yako but is it right to leave everything to fate? Je kila ukishindwa kitu basi it was meant to be that way? Ila I get what you are saying man mtu akisha oa/olewa siyo wazo vuri kuingilia. Lakini kama bado mnapendana will you both be able to move on au ni kusettle tu for what you got?
     
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