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Inakuhusu sana uwe kwenye ndoa au unaelekea, soma

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by juma sal, Jun 24, 2012.

  1. juma sal

    juma sal Senior Member

    #1
    Jun 24, 2012
    Joined: Dec 18, 2011
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    Inahuzunisha lakini kuna fundisho kuu kwetu sote.
    "Nilipofika nyumbani usiku ule, mke wangu aliponitayarishia chakula, nilimshika mkono na kumwambia, Kuna kitu nataka nikwambie. Mke wangu alikaa chini na kula chakula kimya akiwa tayari kunisikiliza. Tena nikagundua macho yake yalionyesha anaumizwa. Nilishindwa hata namna ya kuanza kufumbua kinywa changu. Lakini ilibidi nimwambie ili ajue nilikuwa nikifikiri nini juu yake.

    Nataka kukupa talaka. Nilianza kusema kwa utulivu. Alionekana kutokereka na maneno yangu badala yake aliniuliza kwa sauti ya upole ‘kwa nini?' Sikumjibu swali lake. Kutojibu kulimfanya akasirike. Akatupa kijiko na akanikaripia, ‘wewe si mwanamume!' Usiku ule, hakukuwa na maongezi kati yetu. Alikuwa akilia kwa kwikwi. Nilifahamu kwamba alitaka kujua ni nini kimetokea kwenye ndoa yetu. Lakini kwa hakika nisingeweza kumpa jibu wala sababu ya kuridhisha; alionekana si mali kitu kwangu penzi langu lilihamia kwa Jane. Sikumpenda tena mke wangu mawazo yote yalikuwa kwa Jane. Kwa kweli nilimdharau mke wangu!

    Huku moyo wangu ukijua wazi kwamba nafanya kosa, niliandika talaka ambayo ilionyesha kwamba yeye (mke wangu) angepata nyumba yetu, gari na atakuwa na hisa 30% ya kampuni yetu. Aliangalia talaka ile na kuichana vipande vipande.

    Mke ambaye tumeishi nami kwa miaka 10 alionekana mgeni machoni mwangu. Nilimuonea huruma kwa muda, rasilimali na nguvu alizopoteza lakini sikuweza kurudi nyuma kwa sababu Jane aliuteka moyo wangu kisawasawa. Hatimaye mke wangu alilia kwa sauti mbele yangu, jambo ambalo kwa hakika nilitarajia. Kwangu mimi kilio chake kilinipa nafuu.


    Wazo la kuachana na mke wangu limenisumbua kwa majuma kadhaa na sasa limeendelea kuimarika na kuwa jambo la hakika zaidi.

    Siku iliyofuata nilikuja nyumbani kwa kuchelewa sana nikakuta mke wangu akiandika jambo mezani. Sikutamani hata kula chakula alichonipikia nilikwenda moja kwa moja chumbani na usingizi ulinichukua mara moja kwa sababu nilikuwa nimechoka baada ya kula raha za kufa mtu na Jane.

    Usiku nilishtuka usingizini mke wangu alikuwa bado akiandika. Sikujali kabisa nikajifunika vyema shuka na kulala tena. Asubuhi yake alinikabidhi masharti ya talaka yake: hakutaka kitu chochote kutoka kwangu lakini alihitaji apate angalau mwezi mmoja wa kujiandaa kabla hajaachika. Akaomba kwamba katika kipindi hicho cha mwezi mmoja sote mimi na yeye tujitahidi kuishi maisha ya upendo au kawaida kwa kadiri itakavyowezekana. Sababu yake ilikuwa ndogo lakini muhimu: mwanetu wa kiume alikuwa akikaribia kufanya mtihani katika mwezi uliofuata kwa hiyo hakupenda mtoto aathirike kisaikolojia kwa sababu ya kuachana kwetu. Hili halikuwa tatizo kwangu, nilikubali mpango wake. Lakini alikuwa na sharti la ziada, aliniomba nikumbuke jinsi nilivyombeba siku za fungate yetu hasa siku ya harusi yetu. Akaniomba na kunisihi kwamba katika kipindi hicho cha mwezi mmoja niwe nambeba kutoka kitandani kwetu mpaka mlango wa kutokea kila asubuhi. Nilidhani anakaribia kuwa kichaa. Ili kufanya siku zetu za mwisho zisiwe na migogoro nilikubaliana na masharti yake ya ajabu.


    Nilimsimulia Jane kuhusu masharti ya kuachana na mke wangu. Jane alicheka sana, aliona ni ujinga. ‘Hata akitumia ujanja wa namna gani talaka ni lazima', alisema Jane tena kwa dharau. Mimi na mke wangu hatukuwahi kugusana tangu nilipomweleza dhamira ya kumtaliki. Kwa hiyo nilipombeba kwa mara ya kwanza sote tulinuniana. Mwanetu alifurahi sana na kupiga makofi nyuma yetu, ‘aah baba kambeba mama mikononi mwake'. Maneno yake yalinichoma moyoni moja kwa moja. Kutoka chumbani kwetu hadi sebuleni, halafu tena mpaka mlangoni, ni zaidi ya mita kumi nimembeba mke wangu. Alifumba macho na kusema kwa sauti laini na ya upole; usimwambie mwanetu juu ya talaka. Nilikubali kwa kichwa, ingawa nilijisikia vibaya. Nilimuweka chini nje ya nyumba.

    Alienda kituoni kusubiri basi la kazini kwake nami nikaendesha gari kwenda ofisini kwangu. Siku ya pili, zoezi lilikuwa rahisi kwetu sote. Aliegemea kifuani pangu. Nilisikia harufu nzuri ya uturi aliofukiza kwenye blauzi yake. Nikagundua kwamba sijamuangalia kwa makini mke wangu kwa kipindi kirefu sana. Nikagundua hakuwa binti tena. Kulikuwa na mikunjo usoni na nywele zake zilianza kuwa nyeupe! Ndoa yetu imekula urembo wake. Kwa dakika moja nikafikiri kwa nini namfanyia hivi.

    Siku ya nne nilipombeba hisia za mapenzi kati yetu zilirejea. Huyu ni mwanamke aliyejitoa kuishi nami na tumeishi kwa miaka kumi sasa. Siku ya tano na ya sita ilikuwa wazi kwamba mapenzi yetu yalikuwa yakimea upya. Sikumwambia Jane kuhusu jambo hili. Kadiri mwezi ulivyokaribia kwisha niliona raha kumbeba mke wangu na zoezi likawa rahisi zaidi. Pengine kufanya kazi hii kila siku kuliniimarisha zaidi.

    Alikuwa akichagua nini cha kuvaa asubuhi. Alichagua mavazi kadhaa hakupata linalomfaa. Kisha akaguna, ‘nguo zangu zote zimekuwa kubwa'. Nikagundua kwamba mke wangu amepungua sana, nadhani ndiyo maana niliweza kumbeba kirahisi. Ghafla jambo likanichoma... mke wangu ana uchungu na maumivu makuu moyoni mwake. Bila kujitambua nikamgusa kichwa chake. Mara mtoto wetu akatokeza na kusema ‘baba ni wakati wa kumbeba mama muende kazini'. Kwake kumuona baba akimbeba mama likawa ni jambo la furaha sana. Mke wangu alimuonyesha ishara mwanetu asogee karibu na akamkumbatia kwa upendo mkuu. Niligeuza uso wangu nisije nikabadili mawazo katika dakika ya mwisho. Kisha nikambeba mikononi mwangu kutoka chumbani, sebuleni halafu mpaka mlangoni. Mkono wake laini ulikuwa umeizunguka shingo yangu kwa upendo. Nilimkumbatia mwili wake; ilikuwa ni mithili ya siku ya ndoa yetu. Lakini wepesi wake ulinitia mashaka.

    Siku ya mwisho nilipombeba nilipata shida hata kupiga hatua moja. Mtoto wetu alishakwenda shuleni. Nilimshika kwa karibu na kumwambia sikubaini kwamba maisha yetu yalikosa upendo. Nikaenda zangu ofisini…. Nikashuka garini hata bila kufunga mlango. Maana nilihisi nikichelewa tu ninaweza kubadili nilichoamua.... nikapand ngazi. Jane alifungua mlango nikamwambia, ‘Samahani, Jane, sihitaji tena kumtaliki mke wangu'. Akaniangalia kwa kustaajabu, halafu akagusa kichwa changu. Akaniuliza ‘Unaumwa?' Nikaondoa mkono wake kichwani kwangu. ‘Samahani, Jane, nimesema sitaki kumtaliki mke wangu. Nadhani ndoa yangu haikuwa na furaha kwa sababu sikuthamini undani wa maisha yetu, mimi na mke wangu, si kwamba hatupendani. Nimetambua hilo tangu nilipombeba siku ya ndoa yetu nilitakiwa kumbeba siku zote za maisha yetu, nampenda mke wangu sitamuacha mpaka kifo kitakapotutenganisha.'

    Ikawa kama Jane alizinduka usingizini. Akanizaba kibao cha nguvu, akajiegemeza mlangoni na kuanza kulia. Nikashuka ngazi na kuondoka zangu. Nikaingia kwenye duka la maua nikaagiza maua mengi mazuri kwa ajili ya mke wangu. Muuzaji akaniuliza aandike nini kwenye kadi. Nikatabasamu na kuandika "Nitakubeba kila asubuhi mke wangu mpaka kifo kitakapotutenganisha". Jioni ile nilifika nyumbani na maua mikononi mwangu, tabasamu kubwa usoni nikakimbia mpaka chumbani, nikapokelewa na maiti ya mke wangu kitandani.
    Kumbe mke wangu alikuwa akisumbuliwa na saratani kwa miezi kadhaa nami nilishindwa kubaini kwa sababu nilihamishia akili yangu kwa Jane. Alijua kwamba angekufa karibuni na alitaka asiniingize katika chuki na mwanetu kama ningelazimisha talaka mapema.
    Angalau machoni mwa mwanangu naonekana ni mume mwema…

    Jamani vitu vidogo vidogo vizuri ni vya msingi sana katika mahusiano yetu... Siyo majumba au magari au fedha zilizoko kwenye benki. Hivi vitakupa tu mazingira ya kufurahi lakini vyenyewe siyo furaha. Kwa hiyo jitahidi kuwa na muda mzuri na mazingira rafiki ya kuwa na mwenzi wako, kuwa rafiki wa mwenzi wako. Fanya vitu mlivyofanya wakati wa uchumba na wa ndoa yenue ambavyo vitawaweka karibu siku zote. Muwe na ndoa yenye furaha. Mara nyingi watu hushindwa katika ndoa kwa kutotambua ni kwa kiasi gani walikuwa karibu wakati wa kujenga uhusiano wao
    Mungu awabariki nyote mliosoma na kujifunza hapa



     
  2. WALIMWEUSI

    WALIMWEUSI JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jun 24, 2012
    Joined: Nov 9, 2011
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    Asante kwa ujumbe mzuri
     
  3. mtotowamjini

    mtotowamjini JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Jun 24, 2012
    Joined: Apr 23, 2012
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    hii ni ka love story unaweza toa chozi
     
  4. sweetlady

    sweetlady JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Jun 24, 2012
    Joined: Dec 24, 2010
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    Duuuh.....umeniharibia jumapili yangu kwakweli!


    Imeniuma sana!
     
  5. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jun 24, 2012
    Joined: Nov 28, 2010
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    Pamoja na kwamba nilishaisoma habari hii b4, lkn again machozi yamenitoka!

    Inauma sana yaani.
     
  6. BantuGirl

    BantuGirl Senior Member

    #6
    Jun 24, 2012
    Joined: Apr 10, 2008
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    Duuh.. Inasikitisha lakini kuna somo nimepata hapo. Shukrani ndugu
     
  7. LiverpoolFC

    LiverpoolFC JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jun 24, 2012
    Joined: Apr 12, 2011
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    Duh! Si jukwaa langu lakini inafundisha sana jamani!

    Tunashukuru Jum sal.
     
  8. M

    Malolella JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Jun 24, 2012
    Joined: Feb 3, 2012
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    Du ngoja nimsomee na mkewangu.
     
  9. Mupirocin

    Mupirocin JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jun 24, 2012
    Joined: Jan 28, 2011
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    Dah mdau pole kama ni true story but i learned something today, you made my day
     
  10. N

    Nehondo JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Jun 24, 2012
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    Inasikitisha sana....sob.... sob
     
  11. charminglady

    charminglady JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Jun 24, 2012
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    asante kwa kuitafsiri,me nliƮsoma ikiwa kwenye lugha ya malkia!
     
  12. G

    GTesha JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Jun 24, 2012
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    umetransilate ile ya kingereza eeh? hakuna jipya
     
  13. A

    Anne deo JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Jun 24, 2012
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    Duh inasikitisha sana.
     
  14. Ruttashobolwa

    Ruttashobolwa JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Jun 24, 2012
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    Sijawai kulizwa na story lakini hii imenitoa machozi.

    So sad
     
  15. ERIC JOSEPH

    ERIC JOSEPH JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Jun 24, 2012
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    DU moyo unauma sana hii .machoz yanatoka
     
  16. gfsonwin

    gfsonwin JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Jun 24, 2012
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    mmh! nimeumizwa sana lol !
     
  17. L

    Lukwa Member

    #17
    Jun 24, 2012
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    Somo tosha kaka!
     
  18. Aisha Adam

    Aisha Adam JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Jun 25, 2012
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    Shukran ni story nzuri na yenye mafundisho ndani yake
     
  19. Rodcones

    Rodcones JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Jun 25, 2012
    Joined: Oct 16, 2007
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    This is constructive story
    Inaonyesha Jambo forum ilivyokuwa miaka ya 2007
    ilikuwa saaafi kabisa na sio sasa
     
  20. Mnama

    Mnama JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Jun 25, 2012
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    Its good to look back and do things that made you and your partner be together and happy.
     
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