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Haya maneno.. Jelous...insecure.... Ina maana unanifuatilia

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by sarikoki, Aug 27, 2012.

  1. s

    sarikoki JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Aug 27, 2012
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    Sina uakika kama haya maneno yanatumika kama inavyotakiwa... kwa udadisi wangu na baada ya kusuluisha ndoa mbili tatu... nimegundua watu wengi waliokua kwenye mahusiano sanasana wanandoa wanatumia haya maneno kujikinga na madhambi wayafanyayo (cheating).
    Unakuta mume anamuuliza swali la msingi kabisa mke wake badala ya kujibiwa vizuri...atakuta anaambiwa you'r so jelous..au Insecure...Unanifatilia.. basi mwanaume/mwanamke akiambiwa hivyo huyong'ongea na hata siku nyingine anaogopa kumuuliza kitu mke/mme kwa kuogopa ataonekana namnagani vipi. Inaathiri sana psychological.

    Mimi kwenye ndoa yangu sikuyakaribisha haya maneno toka mwanzo na kama nataka maelezo mke wangu lazima anipe na si vinginevyo na mimi vivyo hivyo kama kuna maelezo natakiwa niyatoe lazima nitayatoa bila hasira, kinyongo wala chuki maana huo ndio wajibu wa wanandoa.
    Ukisia unajibiwa kati ya hayo maneno hapo juu.... jua kuna kitu. amka na shika bango mpaka upate jibu la swali lako na si vinginevyo.
     
  2. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #2
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    Kuna mazoea mabaya sana ya kutotumia maneno ipasavyo miongoni mwa jamii yetu.

    Unakuta mtu anatumia neno 'romance' visivyo kabisa. Halafu ukimsahihisha ama anakuambia unajifanya unajua au anakuja juu na kuanza kutoa povu.

    Na hasa hii hutokea sana kwenye hayo maneno ya Kizungu.
     
  3. kapistrano

    kapistrano JF-Expert Member

    #3
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    Tatizo ni kuiga tamaduni za watu na siyo hayo maneno kuna mengi sana.
     
  4. The Boss

    The Boss JF-Expert Member

    #4
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    mimi principle yangu ni moja tu
    'kama mali ni yangu nina haki ya kuwa jealousy au kuuliza chochote kile'
    hata kama cha kijinga...
     
  5. s

    sarikoki JF-Expert Member

    #5
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    Asiee The Boss.. yaani mimi uzungu kwenye ndoa yangu hamna aisee... nimekuoa lazima unipe jibu la swali ninalokuuliza.. tena kwa kunyoosha maneno... hawa watu ukijifanyau naeka uzungu utaua kichaa ati.
     
  6. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #6
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    Hivi ni utamaduni wa watu gani ambao mke au mume hatakiwi kumuuliza mwenzake maswali?
     
  7. s

    sarikoki JF-Expert Member

    #7
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    Ndio maana nikasema watu wanayatumia kufanyia upuuzi... wanayatumia haya maneno kama kinga... lakini hamna utamaduni eti unamuuliza mwanandoa mwenzako sawali alafu analipuka na majiu kama hayo.
     
  8. kapistrano

    kapistrano JF-Expert Member

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    Nilivyo elewa mimi kwenye main topic amezungumzi kuna maneno huwa yanatumika vibaya that is my point na sikuwa na maana nyingine.
     
  9. Ruttashobolwa

    Ruttashobolwa JF-Expert Member

    #9
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    Kweli kabisa na tena mtu akishaa mbiwa una wivu utasikia ana sema me sina wivu nilikuwa nauliza tu! Wakati ni haki yake kuwa na doubt na mienendo ambayo ana itilia shaka!

     
  10. s

    sarikoki JF-Expert Member

    #10
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    Mkuu nimecheka sana....... tena anaomba na msamaa... mimi sina wivu dear..sorry kama nikuudhi. Mamaeee
     
  11. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

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    Ndio wale wale ambao wanaona mkewe ni kitu unachokimiliki na kwamba chenyewe hakina mawazo, wala mahitaji ambayo yaweza kuwa tofauti na yako kabisa!

    Miwivu tu, lione kwanza ndio maana uko insecure na hujiamini!
     
  12. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #12
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    Wivu is a natural human emotion. Kwa hiyo hakuna aibu kwenye kuona wivu. Ni nani asiyeona wivu?

    Ni kwamba jamii tu ime-stigmatize na kufanya watu waone ni kama kitu kibaya sana wakati sio kibaya kihivyo.
     
  13. Nyani Ngabu

    Nyani Ngabu Platinum Member

    #13
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    Kwa hiyo wewe mumeo hakumiliki?
     
  14. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

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    Hanimiliki aisee, mimi ni binadamu huru sana kama alivyo huyo 'mume wangu'.
     
  15. s

    sarikoki JF-Expert Member

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    Aug 27, 2012
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    Kaunga hata wewe?
     
  16. steveslove

    steveslove Senior Member

    #16
    Aug 27, 2012
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    Hayo maneno kaka uliyotaja hapo juu ni kwa wale wanaopendana kwa dhati pasipo wivu hamna penzi.
    Ndoa mke na mume ni wote kujiamini na palipo na kujiamini basi uaminifu upo cha msingi ni KUJIAMINI na sio kuweka "remarks" na kujiweke vitu visivyo na ukweli unaweza ukaona maziwa kumbe tui la nazi na nazi kuwa maziwa
    Mkijiamini wote mtaaminiana na hadi unaoa/olewa bila shaka ulijua wht kind of life unaanza
     
  17. Kaunga

    Kaunga JF-Expert Member

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    Si kihivyo!
    Lkn kuna watu wana kama kaugonjwa, yaani anakuwa obsessed na mtu mpaka kero. Yaani kama alivyosema the boss inakuwa kama anamiliki!

    Nami nina wivu, u can ask my man anajua; lkn sio ile yakumfuatilia mtu mpaka hapumui.

    Jibu langu kwa the boss ni more personal, maana akinipatia ya kuniattack huwa hanihurumii! LOL
     
  18. s

    sarikoki JF-Expert Member

    #18
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    Thats true... kuna watu wachache wanayatumia kama kinga ya kuwadhoofisha wenzao ili wafanye upuuzi...... na ukiona mwenzako ameanza kukucall names ujue something is wrong. Kuna mtu alisema binadamu anamabadiiko ya mara kwa mara na hayo mabadiliko yanapotokea huwa yanaathiri sana mahusiano, watu hatulijui hili. Na ndoa ni kama living organism inaitaji maboresho na marekebisho ya mara kwa mara. Kama wanandoa hawataliona hilo basi ndoa haiwezi kudumu. Point ya kwamba nilikuamini kabla ya kukuoa hivyo sihitaji kuoji chochote baada ya kukuoa, hilo ni NO!
    Narudia tena binadamu anabadilika sana katika uhai wake...lazima kukumbushana misingi tuliyojiwekea toka mwanzo.
     
  19. s

    sarikoki JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Aug 27, 2012
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    Nimekuelewa mamaa..but kama umenielewa point yangu ni kwamba kuna baadhi ya watu wanayatumia haya maneno kuwadhoofisha wenza wao ili kufanya upuuzi.. wana "misuse". Mfano Mr wako kachelewa kurudi nyumbani.. karudi night kali unamuuliza kwa upole what happened ,,yeye analipuka ooh acha wivu wewe... jiamini bwana. mbona unanifuatilia ivyo .etc.
     
  20. Meritta

    Meritta JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Aug 27, 2012
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    hapo nawe utakuwa umezidisha sasa
     
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