# Have you ever thought like these guys?

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by Lekanjobe Kubinika, Jul 21, 2010.

1. ### Lekanjobe KubinikaJF-Expert Member

#1
Jul 21, 2010
Joined: Dec 6, 2006
Messages: 3,067
Trophy Points: 135
HR = )

After 2 years of selfless service, a man realized that he has not been promoted, no transfer, no salary increase and that the Company is not doing any thing about it. So he decided to walk up to his HR Manager one morning.
After exchanging greetings, he told his HR Manager his problem. The boss looked at him, laughed and asked him to sit down saying;

My friend, you have not worked here for even one day.

The man was surprised to hear this, but the manager went on to explain.

Manager:- How many days are there in a year?

Man:- 365 days and some times 366

Manager:- how many hours make up a day?

Man:- 24 hours

Manager:- How long do you work in a day?

Man:-
8 am to 4 pm i.e. 8 hours a day.

Manager:- So, what fraction of the day do you work in hours ?

Man:- (He did some arithmetic and said 8/24 hours i.e. 1/3(one third)

Manager:- That is nice of you! What is one-third of 366 days?

Man:- 122 (1/3x366 = 122 days)

Manager:- Do you come to work on weekends?

Man:- No sir

Manager:- How many days are there in a year that
are weekends?

Man:- 52 Fridays and 52 Saturdays equals to 104 days

Manager:- Thanks for that. If you remove 104 days from 122 days, how many days do you now have?

Man:- 18 days.

Manager:- OK! I do give you 2 weeks sick leave every year. Now remove that 14 days from the 18 days left. How many days do you have remaining?

Man:- 4 days

Manager:- Do you work on New Year day?

Man:- No sir!

Manager:- Do you come to work on workers day?

Man:- No sir!

Manager:- So how many days are left?

Man:- 2 days sir!

Manager:- Do you come to work on the (National holiday )?

Man:- No sir!

M anager:- So how many days are left?

Man:- 1 day sir!

Manager:- Do you work on Christmas day?

Man:- No sir!

Manager:- So how many days are left?

Man:- None sir!

Manager:- So, what are you claiming?

Man:- I have understood, Sir. I did not realize that I was stealing Company money all these days.

Moral : NEVER GO TO HR FOR HELP!!!

HR = HIGH RISK

And in the employee's opinion.....

H = HASBY ALLAH WA NE3MA EL WAKEEL

R = RABENA YEGAZEEKOM

Source not known - Yahoo forwarded messages​

2. ### NjaaJF-Expert Member

#2
Jul 21, 2010
Joined: Dec 6, 2009
Messages: 896
Trophy Points: 60
Lekanjobe!!! Umenichekesha sana leo, jamaa angeendelea angebakiwa na negative days, maana hapo ijumaa kuu, boxing day hazijawekwa! hahahhhahahah

3. M

### MukubwaSenior Member

#3
Jul 21, 2010
Joined: Aug 20, 2007
Messages: 119
Trophy Points: 35
Jamaa si angemwuliza mbona leo tuko ofisini hi siku imetoka wapi au inawekwa wapi kwenye hiyo hesabu?

4. ### KataviPlatinum Member

#4
Jul 21, 2010
Joined: Aug 31, 2009
Messages: 37,642
Trophy Points: 280
ahahahaaaaaah du jamaa kawa mpole.

5. L

### LubalukaJF-Expert Member

#5
Jul 22, 2010
Joined: May 18, 2009
Messages: 494
Trophy Points: 35
Nilivyo mbishi, sikubali kitu hapo !!!

6. ### PJJF-Expert Member

#6
Jul 22, 2010
Joined: Oct 10, 2007
Messages: 297
Trophy Points: 33
It seems that the guy is not an Engineer

7. ### Da WomanizerJF-Expert Member

#7
Jul 22, 2010
Joined: May 24, 2010
Messages: 1,559
Trophy Points: 135
Hizo hesabu labda uwapigie watu wa politics ndo utawakamata, lakini wahandisi huwapati hapo.

8. ### KidegeMember

#8
Jul 22, 2010
Joined: Jul 18, 2009
Messages: 87
Trophy Points: 13
Ni kweli Huyu hawezi kuwa Engineer Kabisa

9. ### Lekanjobe KubinikaJF-Expert Member

#9
Jul 23, 2010
Joined: Dec 6, 2006
Messages: 3,067
Trophy Points: 135
Si unajua tena HR wanavyokalia viti vya kuswing maofisini anapoongea nawe kwa uhakika huku akikukazia macho kwa ukali? Yawezekana ukawa umesahau hata madai yaliyokupeleka hapo, ukaanza kutengeneza mazingira ya kutofukuzwa kazi. Kuna watu wakikalia ofisi zao wanadhani hawataondoka humo milele, wala hawataki walioko chini yao wajue haki zao. Inapogundulika kwamba haki zimejulikana wanatafuta utata wa kutumia kuwadhibiti wasidaidai haki. Meneja mzuri ni yule anayetetea maslahi ya kampuni zaidi na wala sio kutetea maslahi ya wafanyakazi. Ndio asili ya kuzaliwa umoja wa wafanyakazi.

10. ### MakanyagaJF-Expert Member

#10
Jul 23, 2010
Joined: Sep 28, 2007
Messages: 2,341