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For those who are about to get married

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by ByaseL, Jun 18, 2009.

  1. B

    ByaseL JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Jun 18, 2009
    Joined: Nov 22, 2007
    Messages: 2,218
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    #CASE 1
    Getting married is like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what
    you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had
    ordered that.

    #CASE 2
    At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your
    wedding ring on the wrong finger??" The other replied, "Yes, I am. I
    married the wrong man."

    #CASE 3
    Before a man is married, he is incomplete. Then when he is married, he is
    finished.

    #CASE 4
    Marriage is an institution in which a man losses his bachelor's degree and
    the woman gets her master's status.

    #CASE 5
    A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get
    married??" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm
    still paying for it."

    #CASE 6
    Young son : "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa, a man
    doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
    Dad : "That happens in most countries son."

    #CASE 7
    Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until
    I got married, and then it was too late."


    #CASE 8
    A happy marriage is a matter of give and take; the husband gives and the
    wife takes

    #CASE 9
    When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year
    married man looks happy, we wonder why. Affair ?

    #CASE 10
    In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In
    the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year,
    they both speak and the neighbors listen.

    #CASE 11
    After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when
    I married you." And the Husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and
    didn't notice it."

    #CASE 12
    A man inserted an 'ad' in the classified : "Wife wanted". The next day, he
    received hundreds letters. They all said the same thing "You can have
    mine."

    #CASE 13
    When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one
    thing : either the car is new or his wife is new.

    #CASE 14
    A woman was telling her friend : "It is I who made my husband a
    millionaire. "
    "And what was he before you married him?" the friend asked. The woman
    replied, "A Billionaire. "
     
  2. GP

    GP JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jun 18, 2009
    Joined: Feb 5, 2009
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    yap yap yap
    ebwanaeeeeeeeeeeee
     
  3. l

    livingafrican Member

    #3
    Jun 18, 2009
    Joined: Jun 11, 2009
    Messages: 58
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    THe quotes are simply brilliant
     
  4. KIFARU

    KIFARU Senior Member

    #4
    Jun 19, 2009
    Joined: Apr 6, 2009
    Messages: 172
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    mkuu iko pouwa!!!! next level
     
  5. GP

    GP JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jun 19, 2009
    Joined: Feb 5, 2009
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    kweli kabisaaaaaaaaaaa [​IMG]
     
  6. R

    Rwabugiri JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Jun 21, 2009
    Joined: Jul 10, 2007
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    Labda kwako, kwagu tambalale lol!
     
  7. GP

    GP JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jun 22, 2009
    Joined: Feb 5, 2009
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    huo ndio ukweli!
    jaribu kwa mfano kuangalia ile asubuhi au jioni kwenye foleni ya magari, ukiona ndani ya gari kuna mwanamke na mwanaume wameuchuna hawaongei ujue hao ni MUME na MKE, ukiona wanaongea na kucheka ujue hao sio mume na mke!
     
  8. daughter

    daughter JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Jun 22, 2009
    Joined: Jun 22, 2009
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    ni ukweli mtupuuu
     
  9. S

    Sumuni Member

    #9
    Jun 22, 2009
    Joined: Feb 19, 2009
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    May be!
     
  10. K

    Kijunjwe Senior Member

    #10
    Jun 23, 2009
    Joined: Mar 3, 2007
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    am not married, so..................let me see if its true.
     
  11. Sipo

    Sipo JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Jun 23, 2009
    Joined: Jul 25, 2008
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    Duh!! Wakuu hii ndio yenyewe, haijakosewa hata kidogo. Ila Case one ni kiboko zaidi
     
  12. nkawa

    nkawa Senior Member

    #12
    Jun 23, 2009
    Joined: May 11, 2009
    Messages: 181
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    Other CASES ni mambo ya kufikirika tu......
    Kwangu tambarare kabisaa.....
    ila kuna kero moja kwangu sijui kwa wenzangu.....its a lovely morning mnatoka husband and wife kuelekea kazini alots of jokes kwenye gari, mara njiani jirani anaomba lift, then u have to change the topic or stay quiet all the way....
     
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