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Dondoo za Mapenzi

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Lizzy, Jan 8, 2011.

  1. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Jan 8, 2011
    Joined: May 25, 2009
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    Mahsusi kwa watu wanaotarajia kuanzisha mahusiano thabiti na yenye malengo pamoja na wale ambao tayari wamo ndani ya mahusiano ya aina hiyo.



    KWA WATARAJIA

    1.Usidanganyike na muonekano wa nje au yale maongezi ya mwanzo.
    Kila mtu hua mstaarabu siku za mwanzo hata wale ambao sio.

    2.Usikimbilie kutangaza nia haraka.
    Siku zote ni rahisi mtu kua muwazi kwa rafiki yake kuliko kwa mtu ambae anajua anataka mahusiano nae kwa hofu ya kumpoteza.Tumieni muda wakutosha kufahamiana kama marafiki kabla hamjajiingiza kwenye uhusiano wa kimapenzi.

    3.Uliza maswali kuhusu vitu ambavyo ni muhimu sana kwako.
    Kwa mfano kama ni mtu wa familia au sio taka kujua mawazo yake kuhusu watoto hii itaepusha migongano isiyo ya lazima hapo baadae.

    4.Penda kujua malengo yake ya baadae.
    Hii itakuwezesha kugundua ni mtu wa aina gani...kama ni mpenda maendeleo,mtu wa starehe tu n.k.

    5.Kua muwazi.
    Hii inakwenda kwa pande zote...kuna vitu ambavyo ukimwambia mtu ni vidogo sana ila ukificha vinakua kwa vile tu ulifanya siri.

    6.Hakikisha uwezo wenu wa kuelewa unaendana.
    Hapa siongelei darasa ila mnavyokua sambamba kwenye maongezi ya kawaida tu yasiyo hitaji degree.

    7.Onyesha misimamo yako hata kama unaona ni migumu kueleweka.
    Ni vizuri mtu akikubali/taka kujiingiza kwenye mahusiano na wewe awe akijua atakua na mtu wa aina gani.K.m kama hupendi nguo fupi,mwanamke/mwanaume mnywaji wa pombe, mvuta sigara n.k sio unasubiri mpaka mue pamoja ndo muanze kuzozana.


    8.Hakikisha kuna vitu mnavyoshabihiana.
    Ni muhimu mkiwa na vitu mnavyoweza kufanya pamoja...iwe ni kuangalia movie ama kutembea nyakati za jioni inasaidia kuimarisha ukaribu wenu kuliko kila mtu kwenda na njia yake.



    KWA WALIOMO NDANI

    1.Mheshimu mwenzako.
    Heshima ni kitu kidogo sana kutoa ila kikubwa kwa anaepokea.Kua muangalifu unavyomwongelesha na kumfanyia mwenzako pindi muwapo na watu wengine.

    2.Kua muelewa na mvumilivu.
    K.m kama mlikua mmepanga ama kuahidiana kitu fulani alafu hakijafanyika usianze kwa lawama...ohh hunipendi..mara hunijali!Omba sababu na ukipewa elewa.Kama hakikufanyika leo kitafanyika kesho....dunia haikimbii!!

    3.Msome mwenzako.
    Ukijua tabia za mtu ni rahisi sana kumuelewa na kukidhi mahitaji yake.K.m ukijua mwenzi wako anahitaji nini pindi anapokasirika...nafasi ya kutuliza hasira ama kubembelezwa papo hapo itasaidia kutokuongezeana hasira kwa kumfanyia kile ambacho sicho anachohitaji.

    4.Kua mwepesi wa kuomba samahani.
    Usipende kujikweza...kujishusha kidogo kwenye mahusiano haimaanishi wewe ni duni.

    5.Kua msikilizaji zaidi ya muongeaji.
    Kuna wakati mwenzi wako anakua anahitaji kutoa yaliyomo moyoni mwake tu....iwe ni hasira ama furaha bila kuingiliwa na ushabiki ama upinzani kwahiyo soma alama za nyakati.

    6.Onyesha kujali.
    Wakati mzuri kumwonyesha mwenzako unamjali ni pale anapokua na wakati mgumu...iwe ni kifedha..kiafya...kikazi na mengineyo.Sio lazima umpe pesa kama ndicho anachohitaji...ama kumpiga mtu ngumi kama ni swala la ugomvi....maneno mazuri ya faraja...kumuonyesha uko mapoja nae na kwamba unaumia anapoumia yeye inatosha kabisa kumpa mwenzako ahueni.

    7.Kua msiri.
    Jiheshimu wewe pamoja na mwenzi wako.Matatizo yenu ya ndani sio yakuanika nje kila anaepita aone.Inapotokea mmekosana sio mwenzako akitoka tu kwa hasira na wewe unachukua simu ama mguu huyo mpaka kwa shoga na shangazi wote wajue leo kwako kuna kauogomvi.Na sio hata mambo madogo tu utake msuluishwe na mtu wa nje...malizeni humo humo ndani kwenu.

    8.Wivu.
    Wivu ni mzuri katika kupendezesha mahusiano ila ni zaidi ya kero pale unapozidi.Kua na kiasi....

    9.Mpe nafasi yake.
    Kua pamoja ndani ya mahusiano haina maana mfuatane pamoja kila upande wa jiji...kumbuka yeye ana marafiki zake na wewe una wako na sio kila unachofanya lazima na yeye afanye!

    10.Imani.
    Iwapo mtu hajakupa sababu ya kutokumuamini..muamini.Inakera sana pale mtu anapoonyesha wasiwasi na wewe iwapo hujafanya chochote kusababisha hilo.Pia jiamini wewe mwenyewe kama wewe...unapendwa wewe...unathaminiwa wewe...sio hata salamu tu ikitolewa kwa mwingine unaanza kuwaka.

    11.Kua mkarimu.
    Kua mkarimu kwa ndugu na marafiki wa mwenzi wako.Sio lazima mdogo wake umlipie ada wewe...ama umpelekee mama yake gunia la mchele, kitendo cha wewe kumsukuma kufanya hivyo iwapo atakua anajiuliza afanye au la inatosha kuonyesha upo upande gani.

    12.Usiwe na kiburi.
    Kiburi hakijawahi kujenga popote.Kununa kwa muda mfupi kunaeleweka na kunakubalika iwapo umekorofishwa.Ila kususa chakula....kuhamishana chumbani na kunyimana unyumba havijengi bali vinabomoa.Ndo mwanzo wkutafutiwa msaidizi.

    13.Mwisho kabisa usisahau KUSHUKURU na KUTOA SIFA kila mara.
    Kumsifia na kumshukuru mwenzi wako kila mara itamfanya ajihisi anapendwa na itamfanya afurahie kua karibu na wewe tofauti na mtu ambae anatoa malalamiko tu.


    Nawakilisha!!
     
  2. Tangawizi

    Tangawizi JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Jan 8, 2011
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    Thanks. sasa hivi kama mtu atashindwa kwenye mapenzi akisingizia kukosa elimu hiyo shauri yake. Kuna shule hapa zinaweza hata kutoa Phd
     
  3. m

    mbongopopo JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Jan 9, 2011
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    mapenzi yana aina yake kwa kila watu
     
  4. Masanilo

    Masanilo JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Jan 9, 2011
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    nOT CoMpReHeSiVe eNoUgH something is missing!
     
  5. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jan 9, 2011
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    Go on then...help me out!!!
     
  6. Masanilo

    Masanilo JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Jan 9, 2011
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    Belief and trust in God is the key to all!
     
  7. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Jan 9, 2011
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    Well you can't expect God to force your partner to stick around if you are not fulfilling your own duties!!Mada yangu inalenga baada ya kubarikiwa kwa kupewa huyo mpenzi!Mungu atawalinda na kuwabariki ila usitegemea atachukua na nafasi yako ampikie.. amliwaze..amheshimu..na kumfanyia mengineyo unayopaswa kumfanyia wewe mwenzi wako!
     
  8. Kinyau

    Kinyau JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Jan 9, 2011
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    As stated by Rev Masanilo,
    First Trust in God the source of all love and hapiness.

    second: Live a normall , natural life i.e be yourself and dont act things put in movies. Maisha halisi yana kukwazana na mapungufu madogomadogo. Maisha halisi si kila siku shopping Dubai , ni kuwa mbunifu katika hayo hayo yaliyo ndani ya uwezo wako na kuridhika nayo. Kujitahidi katika yote hasa kumfanya mwenzio azidi kukuamini kwa matendo , jali mafanikio ya mwenzio, mpe moyo na pia samehe , samehe na sema samahani.

    Maisha ni rahisi kama kila mtu anajua wajibu wake, mapenzi si kutegeana huyu anatanifanyia nini na atanipa nini, kwa walio katika ndoa, just give the very best , give your whole heart. With God it always works out.
     
  9. shiumiti

    shiumiti JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Jan 9, 2011
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    Thanks Lizzy...... Leo umetoa maoni mazuri sana hasa kwa wale wanaotafuta wapenzi humu jamvini..... BIG UP SANAAA!!!!!
     
  10. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Jan 9, 2011
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    Asantezz!
     
  11. Masanilo

    Masanilo JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Jan 9, 2011
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    Umesoma akili yangu!
     
  12. M

    Mapinduzi JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Jan 9, 2011
    Joined: Aug 23, 2008
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    "Kuwa msikilizaji zadi ya muongeaji"

    Nadhani hiki kipengele kinawahusu wawili walio katika mahusiano. Ukikitafakari kwa undani unapata jibu kwamba mkiwa kwenye mahusiano si vyema kuongea zaidi na mwezi wako. Na kama hvyo huwezi kusiliza zaidi. Mwisho wa siku nyumba inakuwa ya baridiiiiii halafu mnalalamika mtu akitafuta nyumba ndogo au kidumu.

    Ushauri, be yourself, kuanzia kwanzo wa uhusiano. Kama wewe ni wa kuongea sana ongea sana ili mwenzio ajue unaongea sana and if you can live with that.
     
  13. ENZO

    ENZO JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Jan 9, 2011
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    Can some1 make me a summary plz.
     
  14. Masanilo

    Masanilo JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Jan 9, 2011
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    Wavivu wa kusoma huwa hawafaidi mapenzi!
     
  15. ENZO

    ENZO JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Jan 9, 2011
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    kweli?
     
  16. Mzee Mwanakijiji

    Mzee Mwanakijiji Platinum Member

    #16
    Jan 9, 2011
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    Hizi dondoo zimezama sana; sijui kama ujumbe unafika lakini. Thanks Mama Mchungaji.
     
  17. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Jan 9, 2011
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    I think not!Asante wewe kwa kunisoma!
     
  18. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Jan 10, 2011
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    Kuna wakati mwenzi wako anakua anahitaji kutoa yaliyomo moyoni mwake tu....iwe ni hasira ama furaha bila kuingiliwa na ushabiki ama upinzani kwahiyo soma alama za nyakati.

    Ungesoma hapo vizuri ukaelewa hapo nilipobold ungeelewa nnachomaanisha!!!

     
  19. cartura

    cartura JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Jan 10, 2011
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    Very constructive dondooz...! Sehemu kubwa ya machungu na misuguano katika masuala ya mahusiano ingetoweka kama angalau 75% ya dondoo hizi zingewekwa into practice.
     
  20. Lizzy

    Lizzy JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Jan 10, 2011
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    Yeah tungepunguziana maumivu kwakweli!
     
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