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Dear employee

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by amiride, Mar 31, 2012.

  1. a

    amiride JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Mar 31, 2012
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    Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown of economy, Management has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 40 years of age and above on early retirement. This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).

    Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to management to be eligible for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination). Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW programme (Scheme Covering Retired Early Workers). A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as Management deems appropriate.

    Persons who have been RAPED can only get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependants & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance).
    Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by Management.

    Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. Management has always prided itself on the amount of SHIT it gives employees. Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring to the attention of your Manager. They have been trained to give you all the SHIT you can get.
     
  2. Erickb52

    Erickb52 JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Mar 31, 2012
    Joined: Oct 31, 2010
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    Hahahaaa ubunifu sana umefanyika hapa....
    Big up sana
     
  3. P

    Praff Senior Member

    #3
    Mar 31, 2012
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    Creativity
     
  4. toghocho

    toghocho JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Mar 31, 2012
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    gooooooood!
     
  5. S

    Sheshejr JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Apr 1, 2012
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    Craaaaap!
     
  6. mtamanyali

    mtamanyali JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Apr 1, 2012
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    likeeeeeeeeee
     
  7. driller

    driller JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Apr 1, 2012
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    yaaaah watu wanaweza sana kucheza na maneno ndio maana siku hizi watu wa mistari mtaani wanazidi kama nzi kwenye kinyesi msituni..!
     
  8. T

    THK DJAYZZ JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Apr 1, 2012
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    Network Connected !

    Good to plan
     
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