Cheki hii ya Chris Rock ili msimshangae Mpoki

MTAZAMO

MTAZAMO

JF-Expert Member
Feb 8, 2011
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Chris Rock will be hosting the upcoming 2014 BET Awards.

As early as now, the 49-year-old comedian is reminding everyone that when it comes to his jokes on the said event, "no one is off limits."

BET confirmed that news that Rock will be hosting the award show, that specifically honors the achievements of African Americans, mainly in the music industry, Contact Music reported.

However, Rock is insistent that all attendees, regardless of age and status, should come prepared to the award show because his jokes may just be aimed at anyone.

The comedian told People Magazine, "Nobody is off limits. I'm sure I'll get some memo I'll ignore."

Rock hosted the 77th Academy Awards back in 2005 and is currently busy with his latest gig while simultaneously appearing on BET's 106 & Park show on the same day.

"To me you've got to get in that barbershop funny. You've got to know what's going on. Be aware. Get your timing. I don't change a lot. I try to pay attention to the show."

BET Awards will take place at the Nokia Theater in Los Angeles, California on Sunday, June 29.

Rock's emceeing of the show was also announced via BET's official Twitter account, where they wrote, "#BETAWARDS HOST IS... chrisrock!" The tweet came with an official promotional photograph of Rock.

In an official statement released Wednesday, Rock said, "I watch the BET Awards every year. It's one of my favorite award shows combining people from movies, sports, TV and music. Where else can you get Rick Ross and Michelle Obama in the same room?! The BET Awards is like a party where nothing is off limits. My peers have done the show now it's my turn."

Stephen Hill, president of music programming and specials at BET said, "We've been trying to make this happen for a VERY long while, and we're ecstatic that Chris Rock will be the host of the BET Awards for the first time."
 
"The comedian told People Magazine, "Nobody is off limits. I'm sure I'll get some memo I'll ignore."

Yaani watu wanaomba po in advance......muacheni Mpoki bana......
 
Rock ni noma kwa stand up comedy na vibomu vya papo kwa papo...ila tofauti na Mpoki na bongo kwa ujumla..kwa wenzetu US kuna uhuru unaovuka mipaka....kule hata muheshimiwa president anapigwa madongo, hawamuangalii usoni....na lugha za mother father kama kawa(labda kwenye award wataomba asitumie)
 
Cheki utani wake wa kibaguzi kama huu....hapa si mngeandamana....


"In my neighborhood, there are four Black people. Hundreds of houses, four Black people. Who are these Black people? Well, there's me, MaryJ. Blige, Jay-Z and Eddie Murphy. Only Black people in the whole neighborhood.So let's break it down, let's break it down: me, I'm a decent comedian. I'ma'ight. Mary J. Blige, one of the greatest R&B singers to ever walk the Earth. Jay-Z, one of the greatest rappers to ever live. Eddie Murphy, one of the funniest actors to ever, ever do it. Do you know what the White man who lives next door to me does for a living? He's a f**king dentist! He ain't the best dentist in the world…he ain't going to the Dental Hall of Fame…he don't get plaques for getting rid of plaque. He's just a yank-your-tooth-out dentist.See, the Black man gotta fly to get to somethin' the White man can walk to!"
 
Siku ya sherehe za uhuru wa Marekani akatweet hii....

"Happy white peoples independence day the slaves weren't free but I'm sure they enjoyed fireworks."
 
images
 
There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.-Chris Rock

"I always say there`s no more little girls, just boys with (br**sts). Girls act like boys nowadays. Teenage girls, they go after boys. They`re predatory just like boys. My goal is to keep my girls, girls."
If a woman tells you she`s twenty and looks sixteen, she`s twelve. If she tells you she`s twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she`s damn near fourty.

 Yeah, I love being famous. It`s almost like being white, y`know?

I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot

"Women would rule the world - if only they`d stop b*tchin` about each other."

CANT WAIT.....
 
People are starving all over the world. What do you mean, "Red meat will kill you"? Don't eat no red meat? No, don't eat no green meat. If you lucky enough to get your hands on a steak, bite the shit out of it.
 
You don't need no gun control. You know what you need? We need some bullet control. Man, we need to control the bullets, that's right. I think all bullets should cost $5000. $5000 for a bullet. You know why? ‘Cause if a bullet costs $5000, there'd be no more innocent bystanders.Every time someone gets shot, people will be like, "Damn, he must have did something. He put $50,000 worth of bullets in his ass!" Niggas will say "I would blow your ----ing head off…if I could afford it. I'm gonna get me another job, I'm gonna start saving some money, and then you're dead man. You better hope I can't get no bullets on layaway!
 
MTAZAMO said:
Cheki utani wake wa kibaguzi kama huu....hapa si mngeandamana....


"In my neighborhood, there are four Black people. Hundreds of houses, four Black people. Who are these Black people? Well, there's me, MaryJ. Blige, Jay-Z and Eddie Murphy. Only Black people in the whole neighborhood.So let's break it down, let's break it down: me, I'm a decent comedian. I'ma'ight. Mary J. Blige, one of the greatest R&B singers to ever walk the Earth. Jay-Z, one of the greatest rappers to ever live. Eddie Murphy, one of the funniest actors to ever, ever do it. Do you know what the White man who lives next door to me does for a living? He's a f**king dentist! He ain't the best dentist in the world…he ain't going to the Dental Hall of Fame…he don't get plaques for getting rid of plaque. He's just a yank-your-tooth-out dentist.See, the Black man gotta fly to get to somethin' the White man can walk to!"
Click to expand...

huu utani ana wafanyia wanao kuja kutangaza mshindi au audience?
 
Ruttashobolwa said:
huu utani ana wafanyia wanao kuja kutangaza mshindi au audience?
Click to expand...

Mkuu amesema hivi mapema kabisa kabla ya tuzo za BET.......

"However, Rock is insistent that all attendees, regardless of age and status, should come prepared to the award show because his jokes may just be aimed at anyone."

Kama haitoshi kaongeza na hii......

"Nobody is off limits. I'm sure I'll get some memo I'll ignore."
 
MTAZAMO said:
Mkuu amesema hivi mapema kabisa kabla ya tuzo za BET.......

"However, Rock is insistent that all attendees, regardless of age and status, should come prepared to the award show because his jokes may just be aimed at anyone."

Kama haitoshi kaongeza na hii......

"Nobody is off limits. I'm sure I'll get some memo I'll ignore."
Click to expand...
Ok MTAZAMO
 
Last edited by a moderator:
MTAZAMO said:
Mkuu amesema hivi mapema kabisa kabla ya tuzo za BET.......

"However, Rock is insistent that all attendees, regardless of age and status, should come prepared to the award show because his jokes may just be aimed at anyone."

Kama haitoshi kaongeza na hii......

"Nobody is off limits. I'm sure I'll get some memo I'll ignore."
Click to expand...

Chriss is never boring

i like this very famous statement

'' just because he came doesn't mean you made him come"
 
nyabhingi said:
You don't need no gun control. You know what you need? We need some bullet control. Man, we need to control the bullets, that's right. I think all bullets should cost $5000. $5000 for a bullet. You know why? ‘Cause if a bullet costs $5000, there'd be no more innocent bystanders.Every time someone gets shot, people will be like, "Damn, he must have did something. He put $50,000 worth of bullets in his ass!" Niggas will say "I would blow your ----ing head off…if I could afford it. I'm gonna get me another job, I'm gonna start saving some money, and then you're dead man. You better hope I can't get no bullets on layaway!
Click to expand...

...people always say that there's no reason ever to hit a woman... SHIT! There are reasons to hit every body, just don't do it. There are reasons to push an old woman down a flight of stairs, just don't do it. Nobody is above ass-whupping...
CHRIS ROCK - BRING THE PAIN

... when you're single, you want to kill yourself, when you're married you want to kill you spouse. Better her than me...
CHRIS ROCK - NEVER SCARED

... a man is as faithful as his options...
... men lie all the time but women tell biggest lies. A man's lie is "I was at my friend's house..." A woman's lie is "It's your baby..."
CHRIS ROCK - BIGGER & BLACKER
 
MTAZAMO said:
Cheki utani wake wa kibaguzi kama huu....hapa si mngeandamana....


“In my neighborhood, there are four Black people. Hundreds of houses, four Black people. Who are these Black people? Well, there’s me, MaryJ. Blige, Jay-Z and Eddie Murphy. Only Black people in the whole neighborhood.So let’s break it down, let’s break it down: me, I’m a decent comedian. I’ma’ight. Mary J. Blige, one of the greatest R&B singers to ever walk the Earth. Jay-Z, one of the greatest rappers to ever live. Eddie Murphy, one of the funniest actors to ever, ever do it. Do you know what the White man who lives next door to me does for a living? He’s a f**king dentist! He ain’t the best dentist in the world…he ain’t going to the Dental Hall of Fame…he don’t get plaques for getting rid of plaque. He’s just a yank-your-tooth-out dentist.See, the Black man gotta fly to get to somethin’ the White man can walk to!”
Click to expand...

Na asilimia tisini ya comedy za Rock (hata comedian wengi weusi) yameegemea kwenye black people vs whites.

Hata ile tv comedy series ya Everybody hate chris imeegemea huko kwa asilimia kubwa.
 
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