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Baba yangu ananikwaza!

Discussion in 'Mahusiano, mapenzi, urafiki' started by Annina, Dec 19, 2009.

  1. Annina

    Annina JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Dec 19, 2009
    Joined: Nov 15, 2009
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    Mama yangu alikutana na baba yangu wakiwa masomoni nje ya nchi, wakapendana, wakafunga ndoa - nikazaliwa. Baada ya muda mfupi wakashindwa kuelewana -wakatengana nikiwa na miezi kadhaa na hawakuwa na mawasiliano tena, mama akaolewa na baba aliyenilea na kupata wadogo zangu. Walipoona umri unafaa, wakaniambia juu ya hilo na nikapata hamu ya kumfahamu, nikafanikiwa kumpata kupitia ndugu zake.

    Nilisafiri kutoka tulipokuwa tunaishi mpaka kwake, nikafikia kwa ndugu yake ambae ndio tulikuwa na mawasiliano nae. ilipita wiki toka niwasili ndio tukaonana maana alikuwa busy hakuwa na muda wa kuja kuniona pale nilipofikia. Hakuonyesha furaha niliyoitarajia, nikarudi kwetu na hatukuwa na mawasiliano tena.

    Nikiwa chuo, nilipata barua kutoka kwake, akilalamika simjali na kwamba namthamini zaidi baba aliyenilea lakini nikae nikijua kuwa yeye ndio baba yangu na sitaweza kubadili hilo. Niliumia. Baadae akaanza kunipigia simu akinitaka nimsaidie kifedha, basically mawasiliano yetu yamejengwa katika utaratibu wa kumsaidia kiasi nikiona simu yake najua kinachofuata! Nimekuwa nikimsaidia kila ninapoweza na kwa uwezo nilio nao ingawa hathamini wala kujali hicho kidogo ninachoweza kumsaidia. Bado nasoma, so anataka tugawane pesa za ufadhili!

    Kwa kweli nina wakati mgumu, nashindwa kumshirikisha mama yangu sababu nitakuwa nakumbusha kilio matangani - mpaka leo bado ana hasira nae. Nimekuwa nikimsaidia kwa huruma kutokana na hali aliyonayo, amestaafu na hakujiandaa - ana maisha magumu. Lakini ananikwaza kwa jinsi anavyonilazimisha kumsaidia, ni kama vile ananidai! hana lugha ya upendo, hana subira - ananikwaza!

    Naomba mawazo yenu, nifanyeje maana naona tunakoelekea sio kuzuri.
     
  2. B

    Babuyao JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Dec 19, 2009
    Joined: Jun 6, 2009
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    Kwanza hongera kwa kumsaidia licha ya yale aliyokutendea. Inaumiza sana. Lakini umeonesha ukomavu na utu uzima katika hili. Umetimiza wajibu wako wa mtoto kwa mzazi wake.

    Pili, usiwe radhi kusukumwa kwa nguvu na yeye ili umsaidie kama yeye atakavyo. Unahitaji kumweleza kwa heshima, upendo na busara juu ya hilo: kwamba si vizuri kukulazimisha - kwani kwa sababu hujakataa kumsaidia ila lazima ufanye hivyo kulingana na uwezo wako na nafasi zako kiuchumi. Jaribu kumweleza hilo tu. Yale mengine huna sababu ya kuyaongea kwani yanaweza kuamusha mambo mengi na madonda mengi ya nyuma. Yatosha umwambie: "baba niko tayari kukusaidia, na nimekuwa nikifanya hivyo kwa moyo wote, lakini yafaa uwe na subira pale nafasi yangu inapokuwa hainiruhusu". Naamini atakuelewa! Pole sana.
     
  3. Annina

    Annina JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Dec 19, 2009
    Joined: Nov 15, 2009
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    Babuyao,
    Asante kwa kunipa moyo na kwa mawazo mazuri, nimekuwa nikijitahidi kumuelewesha juu ya hilo, hasa ukizingatia bado nipo masomoni kipato changu ni kidogo.

    Nitazidi kumuelewesha, asante sana
     
  4. Serendipity

    Serendipity JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Dec 19, 2009
    Joined: Jan 24, 2009
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    Achana nae, kama alishindwa kukudhamini wakati akiwa nazo leo anashida ndo anakukumbuka! He is just a biological father, but not a parent to you!
     
  5. Annina

    Annina JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Dec 19, 2009
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    Nimewahi kupata wazo hilo pia, yaani simuelewi -kifupi ananinyanyasa mara ya pili!
     
  6. M

    Mtoto wa Kishua JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Dec 19, 2009
    Joined: Oct 15, 2009
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    Ok, Msaidie kwa uwezo wako , usizidishe mbaka ukawa uko broke sababu yake, sisi wakristu tuna sema mpede jirani yako kama unavyo jipenda wewe, so kama unajipenda hutapenda uteseke, so usi msaidie kupita kiwanga ukateseka, pia kama una mpenda msaidie pele uwezo ulio kuwa nao .
     
  7. PakaJimmy

    PakaJimmy JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Dec 19, 2009
    Joined: Apr 29, 2009
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    Pole sana Anina kwa yaliyokupata. Kweli baba ni baba, hana wa kulinganisha nae, lakini huyu babaako kidogo anakosa busara , hasa akiishiwa! Anakuwa hawezi kukumbuka mahusiano yenu toka siku za awali yalikuwaje, na hivyo ayajenge vipi ili kuziba yaliyotokea nyuma.

    Mimi nina incidence inayoelekeana na ya kwako, lakini naikabili kwa busara sana, maana vinginevyo huwa ndo kama hivi..

    Mchukulie kama mtu mzee, msaidie, lakini ikiwezekana mweleze kwa utaratibu ili asiwe anakulazimisha!
     
  8. M

    Mbunge wa CCM JF-Expert Member

    #8
    Dec 19, 2009
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    pole na tabia ya baba yako.

    kwa kuwa umeshamweleza na anaonekana mgumu kuelewa, naona ni uzee tu unamsumbua kwani wazee wengi umri ukifika mahali fulani wanakuwa na lawama sana. unapaswa kuvumilia na kumwomba Mungu

    lakini kama unamkumbuka yule ndugu yake aliyekusaidia kukutana nae, unaweza kumwomba naye akusaidie kumuelelwesha hali yako na kwamba unamsaidia kadiri uwezavyo

    pole na jipe moyo, jua unajaribiwa kiroho, yakupasa kushinda
     
  9. b

    bitimkongwe JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Dec 19, 2009
    Joined: Oct 21, 2009
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    Annina, siku moja lazima umeze mfupa na umueleze ukweli huyo baba ndipo atapofahamu. Ikiwa yeye alikusahau wakati wa shida na kwa juhudi zako mwenyewe ndio umeweza kuonana naye, ina maana sasa amekukumbuka kwa vile amekuweka kama kitega uchumi chake.

    Ni ngumu lakini naona amekugeuza DECI anataka kuvuna sehemu ambayo hakupanda wala kupalilia!

    Lazima umshirikishe mama yako katika hilo kwa vile akisikia nje hasira zitazidi.
     
  10. Saint Ivuga

    Saint Ivuga JF-Expert Member

    #10
    Dec 19, 2009
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    una uhakika huyo ndio baba yako?? go find our dad
     
  11. B

    Bulesi JF-Expert Member

    #11
    Dec 19, 2009
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    Huyu baba yako hata usimpomsaidia laana yake haiwezi kukupata kwani alikukimbia na ukalelewa na baba wa kambo ambae hasa ndio baba yako. Unafanya tu ubinadamu kumsaidia lakini hastahili msaada wako hata chembe; achana nae concentrate na masomo yako, huyo baba anaweza kukuvurugia masomo yako bure ukimfikiria mtu ambae hakuonyesha upendo kwako!!
     
  12. Fidel80

    Fidel80 JF-Expert Member

    #12
    Dec 19, 2009
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    Wewe mchunie tu mm juzi kati hapa nilimsaidia Babu yangu hakuniomba bali nilimpa fedha ikawa kama ndo nuksi kila mala ananiomba omba fedha nikasema kumbe nimejipendekeza kwake wewe mchunie tu mwambie huna kitu kama alikusaidia kipindi unasoma mpe haki yake lakini kama alikuona hivi kama kinyago mgeuzie mgongo tu.
     
  13. Teamo

    Teamo JF-Expert Member

    #13
    Dec 19, 2009
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    ukiuza utumbo usiogope nzi
     
  14. Fidel80

    Fidel80 JF-Expert Member

    #14
    Dec 19, 2009
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    Haya bana lakini Chuda Raha
     
  15. Teamo

    Teamo JF-Expert Member

    #15
    Dec 19, 2009
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    chuda ndo chakula gani?
     
  16. Fidel80

    Fidel80 JF-Expert Member

    #16
    Dec 19, 2009
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    Nenda TA utaambiwa Chuda Raha
     
  17. Teamo

    Teamo JF-Expert Member

    #17
    Dec 19, 2009
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    SWALI LA MSINGI:chuda ndo chakula gani?
     
  18. Kaizer

    Kaizer JF-Expert Member

    #18
    Dec 19, 2009
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    Annina kweli hii hali ni tricky lakini kama walivosema wengine mweleweseh kiutaratibu kwamba sasa hivi wewe huna fedha ki hivyo, hadi hapo kitakapoeleweka so asikutegemee sana.

    Najua inauma sana kufikiria yaliyotokea mwanzoni na kwamba kwa sasa wewe ndo unaonekana wa maana tena upande wa fedha tu,

    Lakini ndo sehemu ya kuwa mkubwa hiyo, inabidi ukomae na uwe na hekima na busara za kumwelewesha nadhani ataelewa tu!
     
  19. Annina

    Annina JF-Expert Member

    #19
    Dec 19, 2009
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    Binti mkongwe,
    Nashukuru kwa mawazo yako, unafikiri ni vyema nimshirikishe mama yangu, tatizo ni kwamba sina pa kuanzia. Mama hajawahi kuzungumza chochote juu ya huyu mzazi mwenzie, hata kuambiwa niliambiwa na baba ingawa na yeye alikuwepo, kwa mtazamo wangu ni kwamba kwa mama huyu mzazi mwezie ha exist ndio maana nimesema naogopa kuangua kilio matangani maana nitakumbusha msiba ulioanza kusahaulika.
     
  20. Annina

    Annina JF-Expert Member

    #20
    Dec 19, 2009
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    Nashukuru sana kwa maoni yenu, ni kweli inaniuma sana maana mahusiano yetu ni ya mimi kutoa na yeye kupokea. Hatufahamiani, nina wasiwasi kama anakumbuka nilizaliwa lini. Kuna wakati alipata ajali akavunjika mguu. Nikagharamia matibabu yake MOI na kwa Dr. Bake, huu ndio ulikuwa mwanzo wa mfululizo wa madai (kama Fidel alivyosema). Nlipokuwa likizo nikaenda kumuona (hii ilikuwa mara ya pili mimi na yeye kuonana). Mke wake alinishukuru sana, yeye aliniambia nimnunulie suti kali kama anazovaa baba yangu ili na yeye awe kama akina Lowassa! Nilidhani anatania, baada ya hapo ikawa ni simu za kudai suti - nikamtumia 2, sasa anataka kila mwezi niwe namtumia pesa za matumizi -ukweli ananitia majaribuni maana sitaki kumuingiza mama na baba yangu kwenye tatizo ambalo walishaliepuka lakini pia naogopa hali hii ikiendelea naweza kumkosea Mungu.
     
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