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Alcohol warnings

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by Kimbweka, Feb 15, 2011.

  1. Kimbweka

    Kimbweka JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Feb 15, 2011
    Joined: Jul 16, 2009
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    Due to increasing products liability litigation, beer manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containers:
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an asshole.

    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember).
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter and more handsome than some really, really big guy named BOUNCER.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.
    WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.
     
  2. Masika

    Masika JF-Expert Member

    #2
    Feb 15, 2011
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    teh teh asnte
     
  3. Masikini_Jeuri

    Masikini_Jeuri JF-Expert Member

    #3
    Feb 15, 2011
    Joined: Jan 19, 2010
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    hiyo ya mwisho................utata kwa wanaume!
     
  4. M

    Mmwaminifu JF-Expert Member

    #4
    Feb 15, 2011
    Joined: Oct 15, 2010
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    Itabidi each alcohol bottle iwe na a big sheet yenye maelekezo yote hayo
     
  5. Goldman

    Goldman JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Feb 15, 2011
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    Aaah aaah lol am happy now
     
  6. P

    Proud Patriot JF-Expert Member

    #6
    Feb 15, 2011
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    #1 ! LMFAO...it's true coz we (drunkards) don't TALK to folks, we ADDRESS them!
     
  7. Husninyo

    Husninyo JF-Expert Member

    #7
    Feb 15, 2011
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    Heee! Hadi pregnancy.
     
  8. Katavi

    Katavi Platinum Member

    #8
    Feb 15, 2011
    Joined: Aug 31, 2009
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    Yes...
     
  9. Babu Lao

    Babu Lao JF-Expert Member

    #9
    Feb 15, 2011
    Joined: Nov 2, 2010
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    Mkuu yoote yameandikwa ila hili la mwisho utata kwa jinsia yetu!!!:twitch:
     
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