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Age of Civilization in Nigeria

Discussion in 'Jokes/Utani + Udaku/Gossips' started by MaxShimba, Jun 17, 2009.

  1. MaxShimba

    MaxShimba JF-Expert Member

    #1
    Jun 17, 2009
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    Age of Civilization
    Three men went to see God, a British, an American, and a Nigerian.

    This is what happened when they got to the pearly gate.

    The British guy went in first:

    BRITISH MAN: Dear God, when will civilization get to London?
    GOD: In 100 years time.

    The British guy burst out crying, lamenting that he would not see civilization. But God consoled him saying that at least his great, great grandkids would get to see civilization. The British man got up, happy that at least someone in his generation would get to see civilization.

    The American went in next:

    AMERICAN GUY: Dear God, when will civilization come to my country?
    GOD: In 200 years time.

    The American started crying that he too would not get to see civilization. But like the British guy, he stopped crying when God told him that his great, great, great grandkids would see civilization.

    Then came the Nigerian guy's turn, here's what happened:

    NIGERIAN MAN: Papa God, I beg, na when obodo Nigeria go see civilization?

    Instead of replying the Nigerian man, God burst into tears.
    NIGERIAN MAN: Chei, Papa God, why you don dey cry so?
    and God replied.....
    GOD: Even I don't know when civilization will get to Nigeria.
    The Nigerian man then said.....
    NIGERIAN MAN: Why be say everything dey pafuka for obodo Nigeria so?
     
  2. MaxShimba

    MaxShimba JF-Expert Member

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    A Lagosian pastor and his driver died in a car crash and went to heaven. Both of them were welcomed. The angel on duty showed the driver a 3-storey duplex of pure gold and said "this is your mansion". He showed the pastor a small wooden shed and said "this is your dwelling place!"

    The pastor was confused. "I don't understand", he said. "Why should my driver get a golden duplex while all I get this wooden shed for eternity. I have been a faithful preacher for several years."

    The angel replied, "when you preached, people slept. But whenever your driver drove, people cried to God!"
     
  3. MaxShimba

    MaxShimba JF-Expert Member

    #3
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    A man brought his elderly father on visit to Lagos from the village for the first time. After dinner, the son asked the father:

    Son: "Father, should I bring you Coca-Cola?"
    Father: (not knowing what Coca-Cola means), "You can bring the Kola now, but as for the Coca, you can keep it till later".
     
  4. MaxShimba

    MaxShimba JF-Expert Member

    #4
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    And then this Nigerian Alfa went to the beer parlour around 3pm during the fast...after taking 3 bottles, the madam asked if he'll like to take more. ''Haba madam....you are bent on making me break my Ramadan abi?...God no go gree''
     
  5. MaxShimba

    MaxShimba JF-Expert Member

    #5
    Jun 20, 2009
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    He hehe ahha aaa, mshamba ni mshamba tu. Haya niwekee hiyo Coca kwa baadae.
     
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